


Still Life

by winter_socks



Category: Formula 1 RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe - Slavery, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-17
Updated: 2015-06-28
Packaged: 2018-03-01 21:41:34
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 23
Words: 57,504
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2788700
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/winter_socks/pseuds/winter_socks
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Kimi is Master in Charge of Lord Rosberg's body slaves. One day at the market, he finds a broken-down slave named Sebastian.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Kimi wandered up and down the rows of the marketplace, making notes as he went, stopping every now and then to more closely examine the merchandise. 

The slave market was held once a month in a large town that was several hours' ride from Lord Rosberg's estate, and as Master in Charge of his lordship's personal body slaves, it was an important part of Kimi's job to attend. 

Lord Rosberg kept an impressive stable of body slaves, usually somewhere between thirty and forty at any given time. His lordship liked to entertain, holding many gatherings for his group of friends where slaves were the chief entertainment, and he also liked variety. There was a steady turnover in the household and it was Kimi's responsibility to keep the slaves freshly stocked, always make sure there was some new toy for his lordship to enjoy breaking. Most slaves he'd tire of quickly, lasting no more than around six months, sometimes even less, but others he'd keep around for a few years.

They all were sold eventually though, and that was a part of the job Kimi definitely didn't enjoy. Of course there were some slaves who were more trouble than they were worth and he was always happy to see the back of them, but there were others who Kimi couldn't help becoming somewhat attached to. He'd learned early on to never develop any kind of personal relationship with the slaves, as it never led to anything but trouble, but he was also only human.

He stopped in front of one of the slaves he'd brought here for sale today. Jev was standing naked, shackled loosely at the wrists and ankles, chains attached to a wooden post in front of him. Nailed to the post was a brief dossier which listed his name, age, health status and various other pertinent facts. Kimi nodded slightly at him, knowing it wouldn't be proper to speak, and Jev nodded back, smiling a little.

He seemed apprehensive, nervously shifting from foot to foot in the hot sun. Kimi couldn't blame him for being tense, but Jev would probably be okay. Kimi still remembered the day he'd bought Jev. He'd been young and headstrong, so difficult to break that Kimi wasn't sure he was worth the effort. But he'd been so beautiful that Lord Rosberg had relished the challenge of bringing him to heel. Three years of hard use meant Jev was no longer as beautiful as in those days, but he was still passably handsome. And now also well-trained and compliant, enough so that he'd make a solid mid-range purchase for someone today, not too expensive but expensive enough that he should be reasonably well-cared for by his next owner.

Kimi glanced down to the end of the row, where the truly broken-down slaves were kept. At least Jev wasn't there, Kimi thought, among those poor fuckers. He strolled along to have a closer look. There would be nothing his lordship would be even remotely interested in owning in this section, but sometimes Kimi liked to remind himself of exactly how abominable the trade was. It was easy to become hardened to the horrors of this life, and while Kimi protected himself, kept his emotions in check, he somehow needed to know he could still feel pity for these poor wretches, that he had some empathy remaining inside him.

Many of the men here were obviously once good-looking in their prime, but they were now aging, wasted. Most were covered in scars from beatings and floggings, and their bones showed painfully through their emaciated, half-starved bodies. Their eyes were uniformly either terrified, wide with fear, or blank, as if their minds were completely gone after so much pain.

The only buyer who would be interested in these slaves was the owner of the local workhouse. He'd buy them for a pittance and then simply work them to death, uncaring of their suffering. Slaves weren't human, they were nothing but animals, everyone said, but Kimi knew differently. It was only sheer good fortune that had let him be born a free man, after all.

He'd never told anyone, but Kimi's parents had been freed slaves. They'd had a kindly master who'd taken a shine to them and granted them freedom on his death bed, also bequeathing to them a small cottage on a tiny patch of land in the woods near his estate. It was an isolated place, and they'd always barely made ends meet, but to Kimi, his childhood had been paradise. He hunted and fished, helped his father in the garden, and his mother had taught him reading, writing, and how to do sums.

But then when he was thirteen, his parents both suddenly died, taken by the plague that was ravaging the entire realm at that time. Kimi had packed up his belongings and made his way into the world. It hadn't been easy, but eventually he'd ended up at the Rosberg estate as a stable boy. Lord Rosberg's father had been in charge then, and he'd somehow noticed Kimi's capacity for industry, promoting him to a job in the kitchen.

He'd worked his way up over the years, and though other servants had come and gone, Kimi's stubborn nature and tenacity served him well because now, in his mid-thirties, he was Master in Charge of body slaves. It was a prestigious and trusted position, as Kimi often handled large sums of the current Lord Rosberg's money. He had status in the household, but he mostly kept to himself and his work, preferring not to get involved in politics. He'd always had a gruff, almost brusque persona, and he cultivated that, finding it advantageous to be regarded as someone short-tempered, a man who had no patience for fools.

Sometimes he was lonely, but he pushed the feeling away. A warm room, a full belly and a comfortable life were all he truly required, and he knew he was damn lucky considering where he'd started. Every now and then he'd daydream about going back to that little place in the woods, living a quiet, peaceful life but he'd soon bring himself back down to earth, irritated at himself for such fancies.

Like now, as he dragged his thoughts back to the present, looking around at the market. Kimi was standing in front of one of the more wrecked-looking slaves. The man's age was difficult to guess, but his dossier listed him as being twenty seven. He had dulled blonde hair that showed a hint of wave, and a body that had clearly once been lean and muscled but was now wasted with hunger. He was not especially badly scarred, but bore the signs of a recent and severe beating, bruises and cuts all over his body, including a huge purple-yellowed mark over one of his kidneys. Kimi winced just looking at it. 

The man was slightly hunched over, almost swaying with weakness, obviously finding it difficult to remain upright. But all slaves had to stand at the market or face being lashed by the whips of the traders. The man briefly glanced up, his eyes meeting Kimi's before he looked back down, and Kimi suddenly felt something unknown stir deep inside him, some strange, long-buried feeling.

It was as if he _recognized_ this man, and he knew that was impossible, but he couldn't shake the conviction. There was something about his eyes, Kimi thought. They were a clear, cloudless blue, as empty as the sky and they made Kimi feel lost in the strangest, most unfamiliar way.

Kimi looked down at the dossier again, read the man's name. _Sebastian_ , it said, and Kimi murmured the word to himself softly.

The man didn't respond. Flies were settling on the worst of his wounds and he was breathing shallowly through his mouth, his almost concave chest rising and falling visibly. He was obviously not long for this world, and the thought of his death caused Kimi's throat to tighten uncomfortably. 

He frowned, made a conscious effort to compose himself. The market was no place for such wistful, childish thoughts, and Kimi liked to believe he was a practical man with no time for irrationalities. 

He checked the notations he'd made. There were several promising-looking young men in the higher class section that he was sure Lord Rosberg would find most satisfactory. Kimi turned, ready to make his way back and start bargaining, but he paused for a second. He could have sworn someone called his name, but when he looked over his shoulder, there was no one there, only the broken-down blue-eyed slave, still staring down at the ground.

Kimi shook his head and moved on.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kimi makes a few deals. This chapter has some Mark/Jev.

Kimi walked on, trying to put the blue-eyed slave out of his mind. He noticed that someone was standing in front of Jev, sizing him up, and he sidled over, curious as to who it was. 

He recognized the man, he was sure, and yes, Kimi thought as he neared, it was Mark, Mark Webber. He worked for Viscount Coulthard, who owned a smaller estate around a day's ride from Lord Rosberg's property. 

Viscount Coulthard would be an excellent owner for Jev, Kimi was sure. The man was renowned for his loyalty to his staff, though he didn't tolerate fools. Jev as he had been, capricious and headstrong, would have made a bad match with Viscount Coulthard's requirements, but now, as a calmer and more well-trained slave, Jev would fit in perfectly.

And Kimi knew that Viscount Coulthard wasn't one to buy and sell slaves on a whim. If Jev found a place there, and did his job well, he'd be there for life. Viscount Coulthard only kept two or three body slaves, and when they became too old for that type of work he was known to use them as household staff. Despite the problems he'd caused in his early days, Kimi was fond of Jev, and knowing that he wouldn't be used up and spit out like most body slaves would give him a little peace of mind.

Kimi was aware it was inappropriate that he cared at all, but he tried not to think about that right now, casually wandering over to where Jev was tethered. "Hello," Kimi said, holding out his hand to Mark, which the other man took in his own and shook firmly.

"Afternoon," Mark said, and gestured towards Jev. "One of yours?" 

"Yes," Kimi replied.

"Any good?"

"Very good."

Mark nodded, seeming impressed. Kimi had a reputation as being a man of very few words, which meant that when he did speak, people trusted what he said. 

"Yours always are," said Mark. "You look after them, I know."

Kimi didn't say anything, watching as Mark looked Jev up and down carefully, walking in a circle around him. "Can he get it up?" Mark asked.

Kimi had heard that Viscount Coulthard liked to be fucked by his body slaves, unlike his own employer, Lord Rosberg, who was one hundred percent pure top. Jev had learned to tolerate being fucked, but Kimi knew he'd never really enjoyed it, so he'd find it easier somewhere that wasn't an issue. "He always performed on cue," Kimi said.

"Hmm," Mark mused. "He's got a nice cock but I need to see what it can do." He took a small vial of oil out of his pocket, unfastening the stopper and dribbling some on to his palm before taking Jev's cock in his hand, stroking it. He wasn't being rough, Kimi could see, using a slow but efficient motion. Jev looked at Kimi, his face almost panicked, but Kimi nodded at him encouragingly. He checked that Mark wasn't looking, then mouthed _He's okay_ at Jev, who seemed to relax a bit at the reassurance.

Kimi watched as Jev closed his eyes, obviously concentrating as his cock hardened under Mark's touch. "Good lad," Mark said quietly as his movements increased in speed. His other hand brushed down over Jev's side, stopping to squeeze at his ass. Jev flinched for a second, but then stilled himself. "Aren't you a good lad, then?" Mark repeated. 

Jev began to breathe more deeply, and Kimi was surprised to realize that Mark was actually going to let him come. It was an unusual approach, but perhaps it was what Viscount Coulthard required. A few of the other sellers and buyers stopped to watch, one or two of them not so subtly rubbing themselves through their breeches as Jev shot off into Mark's waiting palm. Kimi exhaled, not realizing he'd been holding his breath, hoping that Jev would pass this test, and it appeared he had.

Mark didn't clean himself off but instead held his hand up to Jev's lips. Jev obediently licked off his own come, then passively accepted two of Mark's fingers being pushed into his open mouth. Mark moved them in and out, and Jev sucked and licked with as much enthusiasm as he could, even managing a artificial-sounding moan.

Kimi knew it was nothing but a performance, and he was sure that Mark knew that as well, but being able to make a show of things was an important part of being a body slave. A slave always had to make his owner feel like he was the greatest lover in the world. An owner could have a tiny cock and no idea what to do with it or a big dick and the skills to match - it didn't matter. It was a slave's job to make him feel like a god regardless.

Sometimes Kimi admired them, knowing that he could never fake it the way they did. He had little patience for flattery and pretense, but then he supposed that in the same situation as the slaves, given no choice, he'd find some way to make it work. He'd do enough to survive, at least. Kimi was good at surviving. 

"I think he'll fit the bill," Mark said, moving back and nodding firmly. He wiped his hand off on a kerchief, and said, "Sold."

They shook hands again. The actual purchase was always made through an intermediary, but Mark was a man of his word. "I'll tell the trader to give you a discount," said Kimi.

"Thanks, mate," Mark replied gratefully. "Don't tell your boss, eh?"

Kimi allowed himself a small smirk. "I'm sure Lord Rosberg would be happy to help out a friend such as Viscount Coulthard."

Mark laughed. "Not bloody likely." It was true, of course. Lord Rosberg had no time for nobles of any lesser birth or wealth than his own, preferring only to associate with those he deemed his peers. Mark clapped Kimi on the back. "I'll see you at the tavern in a while, yeah?" he said. "Buy you an ale?" 

Kimi nodded, moving on. It was market day tradition that all the sellers and buyers had an ale or two in the town's tavern after finishing their business for the day. Kimi found the small talk and gossip somewhat tiresome, but he did enjoy a drink.

But first things first, he thought as he checked his notes. He'd already made a few purchases, but there were two slaves he wanted to examine further. They were shackled together, apparently being sold as a pair. The first seemed younger, and had a distinctively arrogant air about him which Kimi had no doubt Lord Rosberg would revel in taming. His hair was light brown and his face was a touch angular but he had full, pillowy lips that looked like they were made for sucking cock. 

The other had tanned, olive skin and seemed slightly more humble, though he had no reason to be as he really was extremely pretty, with black, silky-looking hair and dark, moody eyes. He was taller than Kimi, but his head was bowed, so he looked up at Kimi almost shyly through his long eyelashes, the chains that bound him clinking as he shifted awkwardly. 

Both of them were well-muscled, relatively unscarred and they each had good-sized cocks. Kimi inspected their dossiers - Max and Carlos, aged seventeen and twenty. Not bad.

The trader approached Kimi. "We're selling these two together," he said. "The younger one's practically a virgin."

"Hmm," Kimi said, not having to make any effort to sound unimpressed. He preferred to buy individual slaves where possible, as it was easier to fulfil Lord Rosberg's requirements. Any slaves sold as a pair or group were bound to involve compromises for the buyer, but these two seemed good value. Still, Kimi wavered.

"I'll throw in that wreck over there," the trader said, gesturing towards the end of the row.

"What?" Kimi asked, not understanding.

"The half-dead thing over there I saw you looking at." The trader pointed at the blue-eyed slave and Kimi had to consciously restrain himself from scowling, at once annoyed and embarrassed that anyone had seen him looking at such a run-down piece of merchandise. And yet, when he thought of the slave's eyes, the way he'd looked at him, his chest once more felt tight. _Yes,_ he unthinkingly wanted to say. _Yes, I'll take him,_ but he stopped himself.

The trader was still talking. "I know he's not going to last long, but give him a few days' rest and a feed and you'll get a couple of months' shit-shovelling out of him," he said.

Kimi took a breath. "Where's he from?"

"No idea." The trader shook his head. "Came in as part of a job lot I bought yesterday." He smiled at Kimi ingratiatingly. "You're a good customer, so I'm happy to let you have him as part of the deal."

The guy obviously was just looking for someone to take the ruined slave off his hands, likely mostly not wanting to have to deal with the fuss of a dead body. Kimi knew he should say no, he _wanted_ to say no, but somehow he couldn't. He just couldn't. "Fine," he snapped. The trader shook his hand, grinning like he'd just successfully swindled someone, and, Kimi thought ruefully, he probably had. "My driver will collect them later," Kimi said, counting out the notes to pay the trader his fee. 

He had no idea why he was doing this, except that somehow he knew that he had to. Something about that slave had touched him, made him _feel_ in a way he hadn't experienced in a long time. Kimi sighed to himself as he headed for the tavern, already dreading the trip back to the estate. Yes, he'd done well with his other purchases - five healthy, strong young men that Lord Rosberg would delight in corrupting. Yet there was going to be hell to pay when his lordship saw the broken-down slave among those fresh faces.

But Kimi would deal with it. He'd figure something out, he always did. But now it was time for a well-earned ale. He walked on, glancing back over his shoulder. The trader was attaching a 'sold' sign to the post that stood in front of blue-eyed slave. The slave raised his head a little, and Kimi could have sworn that he looked in his direction, but he was sure he was just imagining things.

What had been his name? Kimi thought for a second, then remembered.

_Sebastian._


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kimi takes Sebastian home.

Kimi sat at the front of the cart next to the driver, checking over his shoulder every so often to make sure the slaves were behaving. They were firmly shackled at the wrists and ankles which meant there was almost no chance of escape, but Kimi always liked to nip trouble in the bud before it started, so he kept a close watch.

The other five sat reasonably quietly, whispering amongst themselves a little, but the blue-eyed slave, Sebastian, was hunched in the corner of the cart. His knees were bent up, his arms wrapped around them and his head low. The other slaves were staring at him, obviously wondering what the hell he was doing here, so different to the rest of them.

Kimi watched as one of them reached out, giving Sebastian a shove, laughing as he flinched away, drawing his arms around himself even tighter. "Hey!" Kimi said, loud and sharp and the offending slave looked up at him guiltily. Probably expecting a lash from the whip, Kimi thought, and he was lucky he didn't get one. It was the slave with the full lips, Max, and though he lowered his eyes in a pretense of apology, he didn't seem sorry. That one was going to be difficult, Kimi could see.

He turned back to face the road in front of them, staring down at the horses at they ambled along. The sun was low in the sky, but they'd make it home before dark.

When they at last pulled into the courtyard it was still light, but only just. Kimi felt exhausted, but there was more work to do. A few of his staff were waiting ready for them, and he directed them to start unloading the new slaves.

Lord Rosberg wandered out the main entrance of the castle, walking over followed by his personal guard and a few of his current favorite body slaves. He always liked to look over the new purchases, and Kimi hoped he'd be pleased enough with what he saw that he wouldn't notice Sebastian lurking in the corner of the cart in the dimming light.

Kimi nodded to his men, and as they unloaded each slave, they presented him before Lord Rosberg for inspection. His lordship sized them up one by one, looking them up and down, feeling their muscles, examining their cocks. He dismissed each one with a slap on the ass, beckoning for the next.

He seemed well satisfied with the first three, which made Kimi feel relieved. Max and Carlos were brought before him together, and his lordship's eyes widened as he smiled. "Oh my," he said. "Are these two a pair?"

"They were sold like that, yes," Kimi said.

"Ooh," Lord Rosberg purred. He licked his lips as his eyes raked over their young bodies, entranced at the sight. "Have them cleaned up and brought to my chambers immediately," he said.

Kimi gestured at two of his staff, who led Max and Carlos off to the bathhouses. He was distracted for a second, not realizing that his men were dragging Sebastian off the cart. Shit, Kimi thought when he saw them. He'd meant to tell them to leave him there until Lord Rosberg was gone. They weren't being deliberately rough, but Sebastian was so weak that he was bumped and bustled, his body hitting the edge of the cart with a sickening thud as he staggered within their grasp. As soon as they let him go, positioned in front of his lordship, Sebastian fell to his knees, breathing heavily.

Lord Rosberg sneered, stepping back like he was physically repulsed. "What on _earth_ is this?" he said, the disgust in his voice almost tangible.

Kimi gritted his jaw, ready to be as defiant as he dared. "He's for me," he said firmly.

His lordship stared at Kimi incredulously. "And what are you going to do with him?"

"I need some help with my accounting," he said. "He can count and read, and he didn't cost anything."

"And you didn't think to ask my permission before you made this decision?" Lord Rosberg was icily furious.

Kimi stayed calm, not reacting. "I'm sorry, your lordship, I should have consulted you first, but I took the opportunity for a bargain."

Lord Rosberg regarded him carefully for a full minute, his silence deadly, and Kimi counted the seconds down, almost able to see the wheels turning in his boss' head. He was probably going to let this go, Kimi knew, but he couldn't be seen to be lax with discipline, not in front of everyone like this. Finally he said, "Fine, but until he can work his keep will be coming out of your wages, understood?"

"Yes, my lord," Kimi said, bowing his head respectfully as his lordship stalked off. He'd forget about Sebastian as soon as he had Max and Carlos in his chambers, Kimi was certain.

Lord Rosberg made no secret of the fact that he didn't particularly like Kimi, but he trusted him implicitly, and that was all that mattered. His lordship was a good man at heart, Kimi believed, but he'd been unhealthily indulged in his youth and as a result was still often childish and spoiled in his manner.

And he was easily led, sometimes dangerously so. There had been a period a few years ago where his lordship had been spending a lot of time with Lord Hamilton, and Kimi shuddered to remember those days. Lord Hamilton had a cruel, spiteful streak and he'd encouraged Lord Rosberg's baser instincts in very undesirable ways. Slaves had been used in ways that Kimi found disturbing, injuries and trauma becoming commonplace. Kimi had watched and waited for as long as he could bear to and had finally reached the point where he was going to try and talk to Lord Rosberg, attempt to get him to see that such treatment wasn't acceptable. But luckily, there ended up being no need, as his lordship and Lord Hamilton had some kind of falling out.

Lord Hamilton had left in the middle of the night, taking his entourage with him, and hadn't been seen again. To Kimi's relief, things had soon returned to normal.

"You need some help?" someone asked, and Kimi came back to reality. Dan, one of the household slaves, was standing next to him, smiling.

"Yeah," Kimi said, "I do."

Dan looked down at Sebastian, who had now collapsed on to the ground. "He's in a bad way," he said, shaking his head. "Where do you want him?"

Kimi thought for a moment. There was no way he could put Sebastian in the slave's quarters in the state he was in, but there wasn't anywhere else that would be suitable. Except for one place. Kimi sighed. "We better put him in my room," he said. Why was he even doing this? He couldn't remember.

He leaned over, unlocking and removing Sebastian's shackles, tossing them in the back of the cart as the driver led the horses away. Dan bent down and scooped Sebastian up like he was nothing, and yes, Dan was a very strong young man, but it showed how little Sebastian weighed. "You okay to carry him?" Kimi asked.

"Yeah," Dan replied, "there's nothing of him, seriously." He looked at Kimi curiously. "What _are_ you going to do with him?"

Kimi laughed a little. "Fucked if I know," he said.

They made their way around to the servants' entrance. Dan was usually good-natured and talkative, but this evening he had something on his mind, Kimi could tell. It wasn't until they were making their way upstairs that he finally asked, quietly, "What happened with Jev?"

Kimi knew Dan and Jev had been close, but perhaps they'd been even closer than he suspected. "Viscount Coulthard bought him," he said.

"That's good, right? He's a good guy, isn't he?" Dan said hopefully.

"Yeah," Kimi replied, "he's a good guy. Jev will be okay there."

Dan grinned at Kimi. "I bet you put in a word for him, didn't you?"

"No," said Kimi, trying to sound as annoyed as he could, but there was no fooling Dan.

"Awww," he said, "you're such a softy, aren't you?" He laughed. "Behind that grumpy exterior you're all gooey like melted butter, I know you are."

"Bullshit," Kimi snapped, but he was smiling. He wouldn't talk to any of the other slaves like that, but Dan was different. Kimi had known Dan almost his whole life, as he was the son of two of the household slaves and had grown up working on the estate.

He'd become decidedly handsome as he got older, and for a while, Lord Rosberg had considered taking him as a body slave. But after a week or two, Dan had been sent back to household duties. His lordship had muttered something to Kimi about Dan's nose being too big, but Kimi guessed it was likely that he found Dan's boundless enthusiasm more than a little off-putting. His lordship enjoyed playing at a dance of seduction and coercion when it came to his body slaves, and someone as eager as Dan wouldn't be his style at all.

They finally made it to Kimi's quarters, and Dan laid Sebastian down on the end of Kimi's bed where he curled up in the fetal position, his eyes closed.

"Tell the kitchen to send up some food," Kimi said.

Dan nodded. "I'll go see Rob and Felipe, bring something up myself," he said. Rob and Felipe were the chief cooks, famous for their amazing beef stew. "Good luck," Dan added as he left the room.

"Thanks." Kimi looked at Sebastian, wondering what he'd gotten himself into. Nothing good, he thought, but it was done and so all Kimi could do was deal with the consequences of his decision. 

He rolled up his sleeves. There was a fresh pitcher of hot water on the washstand and he poured some out into a basin, carrying it over to the table. "Okay," he said, more to himself than anyone else, and grabbed Sebastian's arm, draping it over his shoulders, helping him up. 

"Leave me alone," Sebastian muttered weakly. Kimi realized it was the first time he'd heard him speak. His voice was unexpectedly cultured, like he'd been educated. 

"Not yet," Kimi said. He put Sebastian down in an upright wooden chair, where he slumped over. Kimi wet a cloth in the basin, and set to washing the ingrained dirt from Sebastian's skin. Kimi wondered how long it had been since he'd been given the chance to bathe himself, but it was obviously quite some time. And cleaning him now wasn't an easy task, as the man was so covered in bruises that Kimi had to be extremely gentle. Careful as he was, he still made Sebastian wince in pain as he skimmed over the purpling marks. 

It was only a makeshift job, but after he'd removed the dirt as best he could, Kimi emptied the basin and refilled it with clean water, which he used to bathe Sebastian's many wounds. Most weren't as bad as Kimi had thought, the problem being more how filthy they were, but a few were quite deep. He applied a salve to the worst of them, fingers smoothing the healing balm over angry-looking cuts. 

It was strange, he thought, to be touching another person like this, with kindness and care. Kimi couldn't remember the last time he'd last laid hands on someone beyond a business-like shaking of hands or pat on the back. And yes, sometimes that was lonely, but it was his life. No one ever seemed to truly understand him, and so he'd decided long ago he was better off on his own.

"You should let me die," Sebastian murmured.

"What?" Kimi said, not really listening.

Sebastian spoke again, louder this time. "It would be easier if you just let me die."

"Yes," Kimi replied. "It probably would." Because, if he was honest, it would be. But Kimi was never one for taking the easy way. 

Sebastian lifted his head, looked at Kimi, and once again, Kimi found himself frozen under the man's extraordinary gaze. He was crouched in front of Sebastian, between his legs, and they stared at each other. Sebastian's eyes were clear, their depths seemingly endless and unfathomable. Kimi felt that odd, unanchored feeling creeping over him once more, and this time, he didn't fight it.

"Hey," Dan said, as he opened the door, carrying two steaming bowls of stew. Kimi leaped up, suddenly uncomfortable, but Dan didn't seem to notice. "Rob and Felipe send their regards," he said cheerily, placing the bowls on the table. "You need anything else?"

"We're fine," said Kimi.

"Cool," Dan replied, waving as he exited the room. "See you in the morning!" 

Kimi threw a blanket over Sebastian's shoulders, turning him to face the table. He pushed both bowls of stew over to him. Sebastian took a shaky breath. For a few minutes he didn't do anything, just stared at the food. Kimi didn't speak, not wanting to force things. Eventually, Sebastian picked up the spoon and began to eat, slowly at first but then faster. After he made short work of one bowl, he looked at Kimi questioningly. 

"I'm not hungry," Kimi said.

Sebastian nodded, and started on the second portion. While he was eating, Kimi got up. There was a spare straw pallet stored under the bed, and he pulled it out, dragging it over to a corner of the room. He piled it with extra blankets, unsure if the warmth of the fire would be enough given Sebastian's physical state.

When Sebastian had finished his food, Kimi helped him to his feet, led him over to the pallet. He collapsed down on to it, and Kimi covered him with the blankets.

Fuck, he thought. What the fuck was he doing? But he was too tired to dwell on it. He should go and check that Max and Carlos had been delivered to Lord Rosberg's chambers with no problems, but all he wanted to do was sleep. So he decided that for once he'd let someone else take care of things. If there'd been any issues, one of his staff would have informed him, he knew. He undressed himself, getting into his own bed. He was just starting to drift off when Sebastian spoke.

"Why did you tell your master I could count and read?" he asked.

"I don't know," Kimi said, because he really didn't.

"I can," said Sebastian.

"What?"

"I can count and read."

Kimi turned on to his side, pulling the covers more tightly around him. "Well," he said, "maybe you won't be completely useless then."

He was almost asleep when he heard Sebastian say softly, "Maybe not."


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The next morning. Kimi is mixed up, Sebastian is ill.

Kimi woke early the next morning, as usual. For a moment he lay in bed feeling disconcerted, knowing there was something different about his surroundings that he couldn't quite put his finger on, but then he remembered. _Sebastian_.

He slipped quietly out of his bed and tiptoed over to the pallet where Sebastian was sleeping. The man wasn't even visible, curled up tightly under the pile of blankets, covered completely. Kimi couldn't tell if he was breathing, and for one panicked second he thought Sebastian might have died during the night, but no, Kimi could see the blankets gently rising and falling a miniscule amount.

Kimi exhaled with relief, and hastily threw on some clothes. 

He headed down to the stables as he generally did first thing in the morning. His job as Master of of Body Slaves mostly involved sitting behind a desk and he had come to find that without some kind of physical labor he tended to feel frustrated and closed-in. He didn't enjoy pointless exercise, so he'd get up before the sun and help the stable slaves shovel out the horses' stalls. Lord Rosberg kept a large stable of carriage horses and hunting mounts, so there was plenty of work. It had taken a while for Kimi to stop being regarded with no small amount of suspicion by the slaves but they'd eventually realized Kimi wasn't spying on them or keeping tabs on their work and they relaxed around him. 

Kimi liked the simplicity of it, the fact that there was a beginning and an end to the work and that he could switch off, not have to worry about politics and people and his lordship's whims and fancies. Kimi started at the estate as a stable boy, and if he was honest, sometimes he missed those days, how straightforward everything seemed. But then he'd think about how frightened he'd been and how much he'd missed his parents at first and realize that life was never so uncomplicated.

He hung up his shovel after finishing his self-allotted amount of stalls, stopping to pet some of the stable dogs before he left. They were unfriendly looking beasts that served as guard dogs but they were familiar enough with Kimi that they were enthusiastic as puppies when he petted them. One threw itself on its back and Kimi bent over, smiling to himself as he rubbed the animal's stomach. He finally stood up, nodding at the stable workers as he walked away. They nodded back casually. Kimi always liked people who didn't feel the need to speak unnecessarily.

Kimi's position in the household meant he couldn't stink of horse shit all day, so he'd go straight to the bathhouses every morning. At this time of day there were very few people there, and Kimi enjoyed the peace and quiet. 

There was anteroom outside for changing, where Kimi took off his clothes, stashing them on one of shelves there for that purpose. He wandered into the main bathhouse, a large open, circular room with a stone floor. There were pitchers of hot water being kept warm on the stove in the middle of the room, but today Kimi chose the cold water. 

He poured the water over his himself, gasping at the sudden, icy shock of it but it wasn't an unpleasant feeling. He shook his head, water flinging out from his hair, and then picked up a cloth, soaping it up and washing himself down thoroughly.

Sebastian drifted into his thoughts and to his embarrassment, Kimi felt his cock starting to harden. It had been so strange last night, touching Sebastian like that, the way it had made Kimi feel. Long-buried desires stirred inside him, things he had tried to forget.

It was those eyes, Kimi thought. He couldn't fucking get them out of his head, and it was driving him crazy. He glanced over his shoulder, but there was no one else around. May as well take care of things, he decided. There was no privacy in his room anymore, after all.

He attempted to put Sebastian firmly out of his mind. Not that the man would ever know that Kimi might have jerked off thinking about him, but somehow it felt as if it would be a violation or breach of trust to imagine Sebastian even in fantasy. And it wasn't like Sebastian was exactly attractive right now, the state he was in.

But he'd been obviously been handsome at some point and however hard Kimi tried, those were the images that crept into his head. Sebastian as he might have once been, with a strong, well-muscled body and silky blonde hair, his blue eyes shining with happiness as he grinned at Kimi.

Kimi stroked himself slowly, his soap slick hand sliding his foreskin back and forth over the head of his cock as he moaned as quietly as he could. He imagined being on his knees in front of this other, healthier version of Sebastian, taking his cock in his mouth, sucking it softly, feeling it harden and grow larger at his attentions. 

Kimi would look up at this other Sebastian and smile as he slid his lips down over him, watch as he threw his head back in pleasure. His hands would be in Kimi's hair, pulling gently as Kimi moved up and down on his cock. And when he came, Kimi would swallow every last drop, milking him until there was nothing left.

Kimi's come spattered on to the floor of the bathhouse. As he opened his eyes, he was immediately flooded with an overwhelming guilt. 

It wasn't fair to think about a slave in that way. Sebastian was Lord Rosberg's property, unable to either consent or refuse. If Kimi wanted him, he could have him in any way he chose. Sebastian would have zero say in the matter. But the thought of fucking someone unable to say 'no' was something Kimi found utterly repellent, the polar opposite of sexy. His job meant he could have any slave he cared to, as long as Lord Rosberg wasn't using him, but Kimi had never once taken advantage of that and he had no interest in ever doing so.

He emptied a second pitcher of cold water over himself, rinsing his body off and using his toes to scrub away his come from the floor, pushing what remained of it into the drain. He felt like he was trying to wash away the evidence and maybe that was more truthful than he wanted to believe.

He went into the other room, drying himself quickly with a towel and pulling on his clothes. They still stunk of the stables but he'd change as soon as he got back.

He took the long route back to his room, going past Lord Rosberg's chambers. One of his lordship's personal bodyguards was outside the door, and the man stood smartly to attention when Kimi approached him. 

"The two new slaves still in there?" Kimi asked him.

He nodded, answering, "They were at it all night."

"No problems?"

The guard smirked. "Sounds like everyone's been enjoying themselves."

"Good," Kimi said. "Thanks," he told the man, then walked away, thinking to himself. Max and Carlos would be exhausted by now, but Kimi knew Lord Rosberg would probably keep them in there for the rest of the day. His lordship always loved the novelty of fresh slaves and liked to use them fairly harshly at first, which could be a bit too much for some. Max, Kimi wasn't so worried about, that kid looked like he could take pretty much anything and still manage an insolent sneer afterwards, but Carlos had seemed more sensitive.

Kimi decided that if his lordship hadn't asked for anyone else by lunch time, he'd send in some extras unasked, just to make sure the new slaves got a break.

He continued back to his room, opening the door to find Sebastian still fast asleep, curled up in his bed exactly as Kimi had left him. 

Dan had obviously been in, as there was hot water on the washstand and two bowls of porridge sitting on the table. Kimi changed into some clean clothes, knowing the first thing he needed to do was attend to some practicalities. He pulled back the blankets covering Sebastian and shook his shoulder as carefully as he could. "Wake up," Kimi said, and Sebastian opened his eyes. They were wide with terror and panic for a few seconds but then he seemed to recognize Kimi and relax a little.

"Do you need to…?" Kimi didn't finish the question, hoping he wouldn't have to spell it out, and it seemed he didn't, as Sebastian nodded.

"Okay," Kimi said, helping Sebastian out of bed and over to a screen which sheltered another corner of the room. Behind was a chair fitted with a chamber pot which Kimi kept for emergencies. He himself mostly preferred to use the garderobe at the end of the hall outside, but he doubted Sebastian could make it that far.

Sebastian staggered along beside him, and Kimi sat him down on the chair then retreated quickly, leaving him behind the screen to give him some privacy. He gulped down some porridge as he waited, not wanting to hover but trying to be ready if Sebastian needed help.

"Oh god," he heard Sebastian say, and was about to ask _What?_ in reply, but the sudden stench that filled the room was answer enough. Great, Kimi thought, peering around the screen.

Sebastian was sitting there, looking distressed and humiliated. "I'm sorry," he said, "I'm so sorry." 

"It's fine," Kimi replied. "It happens."

"I'm sorry," Sebastian said again. He cowered as Kimi approached him, obviously thinking he would be punished. "I couldn't help it," he babbled hurriedly, "I didn't mean to."

"I said it's _fine._ " 

Sebastian flinched away as Kimi reached for him, staring down at the ground and mumbling _sorry_ over and over again. "It's okay," Kimi said, slowly helping him up off the chair and yeah, that was a proper mess. The chamber pot was overflowing and Sebastian's legs and ass were soiled and dirty. "It's my fault," Kimi said, "I shouldn't have let you eat that much last night, I should have thought."

"Sorry," Sebastian repeated in a whisper as Kimi laid him down on his bed, stomach down. He wasn't in quite as bad a state as Kimi had first thought, but it was bad enough. He poured some hot water out into a basin and grabbed a cloth.

"Stop saying sorry," he said, as he washed the back of Sebastian's legs. He rinsed out the cloth and tried to start on his ass, but Sebastian immediately shifted out of reach, practically jumping away like he'd been burned. Kimi tried again and Sebastian moved away yet again, his legs kicking up weakly, even though Kimi was being as gentle as he could be. 

Last night when he'd washed Sebastian he'd been more concerned with the obvious dirt and wounds, and he'd only done the most cursory scrub around his cock and ass. But today, this was going to be a problem.

"You need to be still," he ordered, but Sebastian still squirmed away at the touch of the cloth. Kimi could tell he wasn't being deliberately disobedient, more that he couldn't help himself, any touch of his ass provoking an instinctive response, probably related to some past trauma. Kimi guessed that this was a slave who'd been very, very badly treated by his owners. God knew Lord Rosberg occasionally had his moments, especially during the days when Lord Hamilton had been around, but nothing like this. This kind of reaction was probably the result of sustained and ongoing abuse. Kimi shuddered to even contemplate what this man might have had to endure.

But Kimi had no other option. He couldn't leave Sebastian like this, he was wasted enough that any illness or infection would be the end of him. Kimi steeled himself, knowing that this wouldn't be pleasant for either of them, but it had to be done. He put one hand firmly in the small of Sebastian's back, avoiding the bruises there as best he could, and then pressed one knee down on Sebastian's legs, holding him in place. "I'm not going to hurt you," Kimi said, as calming as he could manage. "I promise I won't ever hurt you." 

Sebastian struggled weakly as Kimi washed him, making quiet, high-pitched noises that sounded like restrained crying. When Kimi parted his buttocks to wipe down between them, he let out several heartbreakingly wracking sobs. 

"Done," Kimi said, releasing Sebastian and covering him back up with the blankets. Sebastian didn't move or say anything, still breathing heavily. Kimi stood up, taking the basin and the chamber pot outside, down the hall into the garderobe where he emptied and rinsed them, trying not to think about the effort he was going to for this man. The guy was only a slave, Kimi told himself, but he knew there was more to it than that.

He reentered the room, leaving the door open to air things out, and washed his hands. Sebastian had rolled over on to his back, lying there with his eyes closed, his cheeks sunken and pale. He looked possibly even worse than he did yesterday. Kimi was furious with himself that he'd allowed a starving man to eat such rich, overpowering food, but it hadn't occurred to him that it wouldn't be okay. He had just wanted Sebastian to eat, get better, but it wasn't going to be so simple.

Kimi looked at the remaining bowl of porridge still sitting on the table and emptied out most of it, mixing what remained with some water to make a thin, gruel-type substance. He carried it over to Sebastian, lifting his head and raising the bowl to his lips. Sebastian didn't open his eyes, but shook his head, his mouth firmly closed.

"Just a little," Kimi coaxed, and finally Sebastian took a few sips, swallowing them down with a pained expression on his face. "Okay," said Kimi. There wasn't anything else he could do for now and he needed to be getting on with his work for the day. "I'll come back and check on you at lunch, yeah?"

He put the chamber pot next to the bed just in case, and prepared to leave.

"Why are you doing this?" Sebastian asked faintly.

"Someone has to take care of you," Kimi said, trying not to snap, feeling suddenly defensive. He knew he had no reason to be and that he shouldn't be taking this out on Sebastian, but he couldn't help it. He genuinely had no idea why he _was_ doing this and being confronted with the thought made him uncomfortable in ways he found very difficult to deal with.

"I'm a slave," Sebastian said, sounding sad and confused. "No one is supposed to take care of me."

"You talk too much," Kimi said harshly. "I'll be back later," he added, and stalked off out of the room.


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Life goes on, Kimi takes care of things. Also contains some Nico/Max/Carlos/Mitch/Kevin. And sorry, I said Seb was going to actually be up and about in this one but that got pushed to the next chapter. :(

Kimi stamped off downstairs, trying to calm himself. He wasn't ever the kind of man to scream and shout when he got upset, and sometimes he had to be careful that things didn't build up inside him, anger and despair eating away at him until he could hardly bear it. The only person he ever took his feelings out on was himself, and he knew that wasn't good, but what else was there to do?

He forced himself to breathe deeply, and by the time he got to the kitchen, he felt somewhat better. Rob looked up as he entered, wiping his hands on the dishcloth hanging from his belt. "Hey," he said, smiling when he saw Kimi. "I hear you've got a guest?

"Something like that," Kimi replied. 

Rob laughed. "So, what can I do for you?"

Kimi sighed. "The guest's in a bad way."

"Starved?" Rob asked, shaking his head. "If Dan had bothered to tell me that last night I wouldn't have made you that stew."

Felipe was standing at the stove, and he chimed in, "Bet that did not go down so well, yes?"

"It really didn't," said Kimi ruefully.

"Ouch," Rob said. "I'll do you some simple meals for a few days, yeah? Build him up gradually?"

"Are you sure it's not too much trouble?" Kimi felt bad making extra work for Rob and Felipe.

"Nah," reassured Rob. "No trouble at all. The plain stuff is easy."

"All his food is plain," Felipe said, grinning cheekily. "Plain and boring."

"Oi," said Rob, swatting Felipe on the ass with the dishcloth. "We can't all be spicy like you, Phillip."

Felipe only laughed, his eyes sparkling as he turned back to the stove.

"Thanks," Kimi said, allowing himself a small smile. It was hard not to be charmed by Rob and Felipe's affection for one another. "I'll come down at lunch," he offered, "save you sending it up."

"No problem," Rob sang out as Kimi exited the kitchen.

He headed straight for his work room, which adjoined the dormitory where all the body slaves were housed. Lord Rosberg preferred them not to mix with the rest of the household staff, and though that convention wasn't always adhered to, the body slaves still had their own separate eating area and a large walled courtyard where they took their exercise and liked to sun themselves in good weather.

Kimi nodded in greeting at the guards standing at the door and glanced into the dormitory, checking on the state of things. He was careful not to let the slaves see him, wanting to get a true picture of what the mood was today. It seemed quite calm, a few groups sitting around playing cards, and the sounds of a ball game coming from the courtyard. Kimi did his best to make sure the slaves were provided with amusements to occupy them. The only problems they ever had with discipline were generally caused by boredom, as when the slaves weren't being used, they had nothing to do but wait around. It sometimes led to spats and squabbles over hierarchy, which Kimi liked to nip in the bud as much as possible. 

Lord Rosberg didn't help with that, as he never bothered to hide it when he took a fancy to particular slaves but then he picked up and dropped favorites so fast that no one ever really managed to turn his attention to their advantage.

One of Kimi's staff, Heikki, was waiting for him in the work room. "Morning," Kimi said. "He still hasn't requested anyone else yet?"

"Haven't heard anything," Heikki answered.

"Okay," Kimi said. He had other tasks to be getting on with, updating his records after yesterday's visit to the market. There were budgets to plan and ledgers to be gone over so Kimi settled down to work.

After a few hours he paused, stretching his arms up and rubbing the back of his neck. He looked out the window and noted that the sun was almost at its zenith in the sky with still no word from his lordship. He thought for a moment then called for Heikki, who came into the room, an inquiring expression on his face. "Go and get Kevin and Mitch ready," Kimi said. Heikki nodded and hurried off.

Ten minutes or so later he re-entered with Kevin and Mitch in tow. They had been stripped naked, their smooth skin freshly oiled and shining, bodies taut and muscular. Kimi checked them over, making sure they were in a proper condition to be presented to his lordship.

"This will be a long session," he told the two of them. "You good for that?"

"Yes, sir," they both murmured. Kevin wore his usual mild expression and Mitch had the haughty, high-cheekboned look that was his trademark. Kimi knew Lord Rosberg loved nothing better than to fuck that look off Mitch's face, which meant he was frequently used.

"I'll take them up," Kimi said to Heikki. 

There were more than a few slaves he wouldn't escort anywhere without at least an extra guard, just in case, but Kevin and Mitch were good, ambitious workers who knew what they were doing. They followed Kimi up to his lordship's chambers quietly and with no trouble.

When they reached the door, the guard outside stepped in front of threshold, barring their way. "He gave orders he doesn't want to be disturbed," the man said uncertainly.

"It's okay," Kimi told him. "I'll deal with his lordship." 

The guard moved aside, holding up one hand. "On your head, then," he said, as Kimi rapped firmly on the door.

There was no answer. "My lord?" Kimi called out.

"What?" a breathless voice snapped back from inside, and Kimi opened the door carefully, peering inside.

Lord Rosberg's chambers were huge, with a fireplace bigger than in the kitchen and a table large enough for banqueting. There were several specially built restraining devices dotted about the room, one in the shape of a St. Andrew's cross, others that were fashioned as benches. Various crops, whips and paddles decorated the walls, as well as a wide selection of toys that were neatly displayed. Polished wooden plugs and dildoes, intricately made clamps... Kimi never envied the staff who had to keep everything clean, as it couldn't be an easy job.

The whole area was dominated by an enormous bed, covered in a wealth of silk sheets and draperies. His lordship was currently reclining there, leaning back on a pile of pillows with his legs spread wide. Max was on his hands and knees between them, sucking on his lordship's cock with some vigor. Lord Rosberg had one hand in the boy's hair, guiding him roughly up and down. "What do you want?" he asked impatiently.

"I'm sorry, my lord," Kimi said, entering the room with Kevin and Mitch following behind him, "but I thought you might want some extra help with the new slaves."

"Hmm," Lord Rosberg mused, looking the two of them up and down greedily, not even pausing in his thrusts up into Max's mouth. "Yes, they'll do." 

He mused a few moments, then snapped his fingers at Kevin. "You," he said, "I want to watch you eat this boy's ass." Kevin nodded obediently, quickly climbing on the bed behind Max, hands resting on his hips for balance as he leaned in to lick him. Max immediately shoved his hips back roughly into Kevin's face, and Lord Rosberg hissed with delight. "He needs taming this one," he said. He smiled greedily at Kevin. "And he's full of my come, so lick it out like a good boy, swallow it all down." He watched for a minute, then gestured at Mitch. "Come over here and let me kiss you, pretty." Mitch clambered on to the bed, stretching out beside his lordship, who stroked his chest, running his tongue over Mitch's lips.

Kimi noticed that Carlos was asleep at the far end of the bed, his ass still reddened from what looked like a thorough spanking. "Wake that boy up," Lord Rosberg said to Kimi, waving in Carlos' direction. "Tell him to get over here and suck this one's cock."

Kimi tapped Carlos on the arm, and he startled awake, seeming as if he didn't know where he was for a second before saw Kimi, recognition dawning on his face. Kimi noticed his lips were dry and parched-looking, and he frowned. There was some water by the bed and he filled a mug, handing it to Carlos, who drank deeply.

"I'm _waiting_ ," Lord Rosberg grumbled.

"I'm just giving him some water," Kimi said calmly. "If they're not in good condition…"

"They can't perform, yes, yes," Lord Rosberg interrupted, rolling his eyes. "I know, you never stop saying that."

"Because it's true," replied Kimi. He nodded at Carlos who crawled across the bed, awaiting his orders with a resigned sigh. 

"Here, boy," his lordship said, pulling on Mitch's half-hard cock. "Suck this for me." Carlos leaned over Mitch's crotch and opened his mouth, his head bobbing up and down almost mechanically.

"Should I have some food sent up?" Kimi asked. "It's almost lunch time."

"Fine," Lord Rosberg said. "The Duke of Button will be visiting later this afternoon," he added, distractedly. He seemed unable to choose between licking Mitch's face and intently watching the other slaves perform. "I'll keep these four but we'll need some more entertainment. Another five, perhaps?"

"How about six?" Kimi replied. The Duke of Button was one of the more pleasant of his lordship's friends, but the man's near-insatiable appetite was well-known.

"That's good." Lord Rosberg waved one hand dismissively at Kimi, who bowed and then left the chambers.

He made his way back to the kitchen, letting Rob and Felipe know his lordship and the slaves would be requiring sustenance. The two of them were flat out at this time of day, but Rob had two bowls of soup set out warming ready for Kimi, one thick with vegetables and meat and another that was an almost clear broth. "Thanks," Kimi said, picking up the bowls and heading up to his room.

He steeled himself as he approached, feeling some trepidation about what he would find if Sebastian had been sick again. But when he opened the door, the room was quiet and clean, Sebastian still fast asleep.

Kimi gulped down his own soup, then shook Sebastian awake. He moaned in protest at Kimi's touch, burying his face under the blankets, but Kimi was insistent. He pulled the covers back and grabbed a few extra pillows from his own bed, propping Sebastian up a little. "Eat," he said, ignoring Sebastian's muttered complaints and lifting a spoonful of broth to his lips. He swallowed it down with a grimace, his eyes barely even open as Kimi offered him another spoonful. 

He managed about half the bowl before he refused any more, and Kimi decided that would do for today. "You'll feel better soon," he told Sebastian, not sure who he was trying to reassure but Sebastian didn't reply, huddling back into the bed.

Kimi stared at him helplessly, feeling as if there must be something he could do, but he knew that what Sebastian need most right now was rest. The best thing Kimi could do was to leave him alone. 

On his way back to his work room, Kimi ran into the estate manager, Toto. Herr Wolff, as most the of the staff addressed him, was a fair but formidable presence around the castle and the only person Kimi knew who had even the slightest influence over Lord Rosberg. His lordship genuinely took Toto's opinion and guidance to heart, which was very unusual. Kimi often quietly thought that Herr Wolff should possibly exercise that influence more often than he did, but the man seemed mostly content to let his lordship have his head.

Kimi was also aware that Toto never quite trusted him, which was probably reasonable. All the other staff were directly under Toto's charge, but the personal nature of Kimi's job meant that he was the one exception to that rule and answered only to Lord Rosberg. A more political man than Kimi could use that to undermine Toto's position, but Kimi wasn't interested in such trivialities.

He nodded in greeting as they passed each other, prepared to keep walking, but Toto stopped and said, "Can I talk to you?" 

Kimi groaned inwardly, but replied, "Of course."

"I hear you bought yourself an assistant, is that correct?"

Kimi knew that as someone to be used for household rather than body slave purposes, Sebastian's purchase technically should have authorized by Toto. "The trader threw him in as a bonus with some others," Kimi said. "I know I should have consulted you, I'm sorry. It was impulsive of me." 

" _Impulsive?_ " Toto mused, looking at Kimi carefully. "That's not like you."

"Sorry," Kimi repeated, uncomfortable under such scrutiny.

"Just check with me next time, yes?"

"Okay," said Kimi, walking away, unwilling to discuss things any further.

It seemed as if Sebastian had brought him nothing but aggravation, he thought. The rational part of his brain said _get rid of him_ but Kimi knew somewhere deep in his bones that that wasn't even an option. 

It was too late to second guess himself. Everyone had always told him he was too stubborn but Kimi sometimes couldn't see why that was such a bad thing. Like everything else, he'd see this through to the end.


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Duke of Button arrives, Kimi and Sebastian have a misunderstanding. (I couldn't resist a bit of Jenson and Kimi interaction, so there's some Nico/Jenson/various people, but the rest is all Kimi and Seb.)

Kimi went back to work, checking over his current roster of slaves, deciding who would be suitable for his lordship and the Duke of Button. Marcus, definitely, as the Duke liked his blondes. He was especially fond of Kevin, but Marcus was another favorite. Then Dany, perhaps, and Charles?

He had a few slaves brought in for inspection before he made his final choice. Marcus, Dany, Charles, Stoffel, Alex and Pierre. They were taken off to the bathhouse to be cleaned up, their bodies then oiled till they shone, as per his lordship's exacting specifications. Heikki and some of the guards took them upstairs and a short while after, Kimi heard the sounds of the Duke of Button's carriage pulling up in the main courtyard. 

A few hours later, Kimi was finished for the evening, but he decided to check on things in Lord Rosberg's chambers one last time. 

"Come in," the Duke called when Kimi knocked on the door. His lordship seemed to be buried somewhere in a tangle of writhing bodies on his bed, and the Duke of Button was sprawled in a large armchair nearby. Mitch and Alex were on their knees in front of him, sucking and licking his cock, while Marcus and Kevin were perched on the arms on the chair either side of him, taking it in turns to be kissed and nipped at by the Duke.

Kimi could remember a time when he would have felt awkward and embarrassed around such displays but now he didn't give it a second thought. He was always on alert for mistreatment of any kind, but if everything was in order in that regard, he barely paid attention to whatever else was going on.

"Hey, Kimi," the Duke said, pulling away from Kevin's kiss.

"Your grace," Kimi replied, bowing. "I wanted to ask if the two of you needed anything before I retired for the night."

"That's very kind of you," the Duke said, smiling. "Dinner's on its way, isn't it, Nico?" he called out.

"Yes," his lordship answered, voice muffled by whatever it was he was doing.

"And we ordered more wine, didn't we?"

"We did."

"So we're all set, you see." The Duke grinned at him slyly. "What about you, Kimi, do you need anything?"

"I'm fine, your grace," Kimi said. The Duke of Button always seemed to take Kimi's impassive exterior as something of a challenge, and took pleasure in needling him. He meant no harm, Kimi knew, and there was nothing malicious in his intentions, but it was still annoying. 

"Are you sure?" the Duke asked, with exaggeratedly faked sincerity. "Are you sure you wouldn't like one of these pretty boys to suck your cock? Because I have to tell you, I'd really like to watch you get your dick sucked. I think that would be very entertaining."

"Thank you, but no," Kimi said, trying not to show his irritation, knowing it would only egg the man on.

"Do you think Kimi's noisy in bed, Nico?" the Duke asked. "Or do you think he's still the strong, silent type even when he's got his dick up some sweet thing's ass?"

"I'm sure he's far too uptight to get his dick up anyone's ass."

"I don't know," said the Duke. He shifted his hips, spreading his legs wider as Mitch and Alex licked him, smiling up at Kimi with a dirty look on his face. "I think he'd be a wild one if you could get him to let go." 

"For fuck's sake," Lord Rosberg growled. "Could you please not make me think about my staff's sexual habits while I'm trying to enjoy myself?"

"Sorry, darling," the Duke said contritely.

"Well," Kimi said, praying the conversation was over. "If you don't need anything else, I'll be going. If you could make sure everyone gets enough rest and water."

The Duke laughed fondly. "You're such a mother hen," he said.

"He's boring, is what he is," Lord Rosberg stated, getting up off the bed and walking across the room, slowly stroking his cock as he observed Mitch and Alex at work on their knees in front of Jenson. He snapped his fingers in the direction of the bed, and Pierre hastily shuffled over. Lord Rosberg gestured at him to turn around and he obeyed, his lordship licking his fingers before pressing them into the boy's ass, working them in and out as he watched the scene before him. "Kimi's never been any fun," his lordship added absently.

"Aw," the Duke replied, turning back to Kevin and caressing his face tenderly. "But that's why your boys are so good, because he's so serious about looking after them."

"Maybe," said Lord Rosberg, shrugging. "That will be all." He waved his hand dismissively and Kimi turned to leave the chambers.

"Sleep well, Kimi," the Duke called out from behind him. "Think of me when you're having a silent wank tonight, won't you?" Kimi closed the door, wincing.

It had been a long day, and he still had to take care of Sebastian when got back to his room but he found himself smiling as he made his way down through the endless hallways of the castle. Sebastian wasn't exactly company, but somehow the thought of going back to a room that for the first time in what felt like forever wouldn't be cold and empty made Kimi's heart feel just a little lighter. 

===

Time passed, and Kimi soon fell into a daily routine. Stables, bathhouse, help Sebastian eat, work, check on Sebastian at lunch time, more work, then dinner, helping Sebastian bathe, and sleep. He'd assumed he'd eventually begin to resent the imposition on his time and privacy, but curiously, he found it wasn't so bad, always having someone else around. Sebastian didn't speak much, which suited Kimi fine, but him just _being_ there was kind of nice. In the past, Kimi had always stayed in his work room as late as possible, but now he often found himself heading up early to check on Sebastian, and not because he had to. He _wanted_ to. 

Taking care of Sebastian gave a purpose and structure to Kimi's days which he was surprised to realize had been lacking. Yes, it was part of Kimi's job to care for others, but it was just that - a job. Looking after Sebastian wasn't something he was compelled to do, it was something he chose to do, and somehow that made all the difference.

And Sebastian's health was gradually, steadily improving. After a day or two he was able to be helped out of bed to once again sit at the table to eat, wrapped in one of his blankets, and he could stand upright long enough for Kimi to wash him, which made life easier. After the incident with the chamber pot, Kimi was very careful to only skirt lightly over his ass and cock, not wanting to upset him. Even with such a faint touch, he would always flinch away, but his reaction was never as severe as the first time.

One evening, just over a week after Sebastian had arrived, Kimi was preparing the hot water, when Sebastian offered, "I think I can bathe myself tonight, if that would help you?"

"Okay," Kimi said. "But tell me if you start to feel faint or anything, yes?"

Sebastian nodded, and picked up the basin of water, placing it in front of the fire and wetting the cloth.

Kimi sat down at the table, wanting to be close by if Sebastian needed any assistance. He'd brought some of his ledgers up to work on tonight so he opened one and picked up his pen, dipping it in the inkstand.

Neither of them spoke as Sebastian stood in front of the fire, washing himself over with the cloth, casually and unashamedly naked. Body slaves were so accustomed to being without clothes that it became second nature to them, Kimi knew.

He did his best to concentrate on the ledgers in front of him, but it was hard to resist a few sideways glances at Sebastian. When Kimi had bathed him, it had been easier to stay clinical, concentrating on one body part at a time, assessing Sebastian's health and the state of his injuries. 

But this was different, Kimi thought. So very different. Sebastian ran the washcloth slowly, almost sensually up and down his arms, over his shoulders. Water dripped down his back in rivulets, and Kimi could hear him breathe as he bent over to rinse the cloth in the basin beside him.

The man was still painfully thin, but his bruises were now mostly faded, wounds healing. The gray, ashen pallor was gone from his skin and had replaced by a healthier-looking sheen. The light of the fire flickered softly, casting a rosy glow over his body, the shadows dipping and weaving on his skin.

Focus, Kimi told himself, trying desperately to quell the stirring he felt inside his breeches. 

But then at last Sebastian was done. He dried himself off and then wrapped up in his usual blanket, wandering across the room to peer over Kimi's shoulder at the ledger. Kimi kept working, not saying anything, but then Sebastian leaned over, pointing to one of the numbers. "That should be five hundred and thirty _two_ ," he said.

Kimi quickly recalculated the column of figures in his head, and to his surprise, Sebastian's correction was right. He looked at the man curiously. "Where did you learn that?" he asked. Sebastian had said he could count, but the accounts were far more complicated than the simple arithmetic Kimi had expected he'd meant he was able to do. Spotting a mistake like that was not something someone with minimal skills would be capable of. 

"Nowhere," Sebastian replied, the word strained, bordering on defensive as he turned away.

It was obviously something he didn't want to talk about and Kimi had no interest in pushing things. "Well, if you're feeling better," he mused instead, "maybe you can start some work. Okay?"

Sebastian turned back to face him. "Okay," he agreed, his voice quiet. His mouth was suddenly thin and tight, his jaw tense. Kimi saw his shoulders rise and fall as he took a deep breath, dropping the blanket that covered him on to the floor. He walked towards where Kimi was seated, then kneeled down beside him.

He looked up at Kimi's face and for a second Kimi couldn't bring himself to meet the gaze, certain that he would once again fall into that endless ocean of blue that was Sebastian's eyes, but when he finally looked back, it wasn't even remotely the same. There was nothing there. Nothing at all.

Instead of the of the unnerving depths Kimi had seen there previously, Sebastian's eyes were closed off and shuttered. There was a blank, anguished look on his face as he began to rub one hand mechanically up and down Kimi's thigh. 

A brief moment passed where Kimi couldn't quite understand what was happening, his brain somehow unable to put the pieces together, but then Sebastian reached out and began to unlace the front of Kimi's breeches.

And _fuck_ , Kimi thought, leaping up backwards, almost knocking over the chair in his haste. "What… what are you doing?" he stammered.

"I'm sorry, master," Sebastian said quickly, standing up, his head bowed. "If that's not what you require, then something else, just tell me, I can do whatever you want, I swear."

"I don't want anything," Kimi exclaimed. "Why would you think that's what I wanted? Why would you do that?"

Sebastian stared at him. "You said I would be starting work…?" His voice trailed away in confusion.

"I meant the books," said Kimi. "Helping with the accounts. You're not my body slave."

"I'm not?" The expression of naked and unabashed _relief_ on Sebastian's face was almost painful to see.

"No!"

"I saw you looking at me…" Sebastian said. "When I was bathing before and I just thought..."

"Well, I'm sorry," Kimi replied. "I shouldn't have been looking at you." He shook his head, irritated with himself for having so little self-control. "That wasn't right."

"It doesn't matter."

"Yes, it does," said Kimi. "And I'll get you some clothes in the morning." If Sebastian was going to be up and about more, he couldn't just wander around with a bed cover draped over him like he'd been doing up until now. No wonder the poor guy had gotten the wrong idea. It wasn't fair or proper for him to be naked all the time and Kimi was angry it hadn't occurred to him before. 

He inhaled slowly, knowing he needed to calm the now somewhat fraught atmosphere in the room, so he sat back down on his chair, pulling another up beside him. "Come on," he said, gently. "You can watch me work, learn the system we use."

Sebastian nodded quietly, picking his blanket back up and wrapping it around himself as he sat down next to Kimi.

"And don't call me 'master'," Kimi said.

"What should I call you?"

"You're supposed to call me 'sir'." Kimi hated that word, but he was aware that it was necessary in some situations. The world was a hierarchy, and however unfair that might be, Kimi couldn't change it. It didn't matter to him in the slightest how Sebastian addressed him, but it wasn't up to him to decide.

"Sir," said Sebastian. "Okay." 

Kimi went on with his work, adding up and recording the columns of numbers as Sebastian watched intently, frowning with concentration. The room was silent apart from the flickering crackle of the fire and the scratch of Kimi's pen as he noted the figures.

He had paused for a moment when Sebastian asked in a subdued voice, "Do you use your master's slaves?"

"What?"

"For your pleasure," said Sebastian. "If that's not why you bought me." He was staring down at the ledger, not looking at Kimi at he spoke. "I imagine you have your pick of the best of them."

"No, I don't," Kimi replied. "I would never sleep with any of the slaves. I…" He shook his head helplessly. "I wouldn't ever do that."

Sebastian nodded as if he understood. "I know some people don't like being with slaves," he said. "We're not clean, we've been with so many others."

"No," said Kimi, "that's got nothing to do with it." He felt foolish trying to explain it, knowing that his views were so alien to how most people thought that they could barely comprehend them. "I just wouldn't want to be with someone who didn't really want to be with me."

"So you have someone else?" Sebastian said. "A free man?"

"No," Kimi answered. 

"Then what do you do?" Sebastian asked curiously.

"I don't do anything." Kimi shrugged, feeling strangely embarrassed. Talking about and dealing with sexual matters was part of his everyday life, but this wasn't the same thing at all. This was personal and as a result it felt far more intimate. "I… do myself," he said. "When I need to." He was blushing, he could feel it, and he looked away. "Could we get on with this work?"

"Sorry, sir," Sebastian replied.

They'd finished up for the night and Kimi was undressing for bed when Sebastian next spoke. "Can I ask you one more question, sir?" he asked hesitantly.

"If you must," Kimi said, impatiently. _As long as it's not about my fucking sex life_ , he wanted to add, but bit his tongue.

"What's your name?"

"What?" Kimi replied, surprised.

"Your name," Sebastian said. "If that would be okay with you, I'd like to know your name."

"Oh," said Kimi. "It's Kimi."

Sebastian nodded, obviously repeating the word to himself in his head, though he didn't say it out loud. "Thank you," he said.

"You're welcome," Kimi answered. "Now can we please stop talking?"

Sebastian smiled the very smallest of smiles. "Of course, sir," he said.


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Seb gets dressed (at last!), meets Dan, and continues to improve. This one's a bit short but the next chapter should be longer if all goes according to plan!! 
> 
> *** Also, just a quick note that I had 'Mark' as in Mark Arnall in a minor role as one of Kimi's staff in the last few chapters, but I realized that was probably quite confusing because of Mark Webber's part in the story so Kimi's second in command will now be Heikki Huovinen.***

The next morning on his way back from the bathhouse, Kimi stopped by his work room and picked up a few of his old ledgers and record books. If he was up to it, Sebastian could study them, get a good handle on the accounts and systems. There was a linen store room nearby, and Kimi went in, grabbed some breeches and underwear for Sebastian. He lingered a little over the choice of shirt, trying to think what would go well with Sebastian's eyes and coloring, and eventually chose blue, with red piping at the hems.

By the time he got back up to his room, Sebastian was stirring in his bed. "I brought you clothes," Kimi said. 

Sebastian sat up, yawning, then crawled out from under the covers. He stretched his arms over his head, wincing, then wandered over, looking through Kimi's selection of garments. 

"I'll get you some more tomorrow if those are okay," Kimi said. "And some boots, I forgot boots."

Sebastian nodded and pulled on the underwear, then the breeches. Kimi concentrated very hard on _not_ looking at his body, not wanting any repeat of last night's misunderstanding. He turned away, staring up at the ceiling until he was sure Sebastian was fully clothed. When, out of the corner of his eye, he saw Sebastian tug the shirt over his head and tuck it in, he exhaled with relief and turned back around.

The clothes were ill-fitting, but then Kimi doubted anything would be the right size for Sebastian, emaciated as he still was. The shirt was more like a shapeless sack, and even laced as tight as possible the breeches hung loosely off Sebastian's hips, but they seemed as if they'd stay up, at least. And most importantly, Sebastian appeared to be slightly more comfortable, as if he was more certain of himself now he was properly dressed. 

"These are fine, thank you very much, sir," Sebastian said. His face was pale, eyes soft with sleep, and he sat down, leafing through one of the record books Kimi had brought up.

The door suddenly swung open, and Dan raced through, calling out, "Sorry, I know I'm late." He bustled into the room, precariously balancing a pitcher of hot water and two bowls of porridge in his arms. He set everything down on the table, almost spilling the water in the process, but he managed to keep everything upright. He stepped away, holding up his hands in the hope that nothing more would fall. "Phew," he said dramatically, then leaped back with almost comedic surprise at the sight of Sebastian.

"Holy shit!" he exclaimed, looking Sebastian up and down. "Dude! You don't even look like the same person!" He rushed over, holding out his hand. "I'm Dan," he said, grabbing Sebastian's hand and pumping it up and down eagerly. "It's so good to finally meet you."

"Sebastian," Sebastian said, his features stuck somewhere between horrified and bemused. Dan's personality often had that effect on people, in Kimi's experience.

"Oh, wow," Dan said. "I'd thought you were a goner for sure. I brought you up here, you were like… nothing, just a bag of bones."

"Well, thank you…" Sebastian started but Dan only kept talking.

"And then all week you've just been this lump in the corner over there," he went on, gesturing at Sebastian's bed. "But look at you now!" He grinned, glancing over at Kimi for a second. "I can see the big guy here has been taking care of you real well, yeah?"

"Ah, yes," Sebastian said uncertainly.

Dan narrowed his eyes and looked sternly at Sebastian, his face suddenly serious as he pointed one forefinger firmly in Sebastian's direction. "You have any complaints about the way he's treating you, you come see me, all right?"

Sebastian stared back at him, his mouth hanging open with disbelief. "I…" he stuttered.

Kimi could see Dan was holding his breath, his shoulders moving with barely contained laughter until he finally cracked, his face splitting with that huge, irresistible smile. "Nah, man, I'm just shitting you," he laughed, practically dancing over to punch Sebastian gently on the bicep. 

"Oh," Sebastian said, rubbing his arm. "Well."

"And you won't have any complaints about this guy, I know," Dan said. "He's the best."

"Don't you have something else to be doing?" Kimi asked mildly, sitting down at the table and pulling one of the bowls of porridge over in front of him. He pushed the other towards Sebastian, who was wide-eyed with confusion. 

"Yep," Dan said, breezing out of the room. "See you, guys," he called out from the hallway.

Sebastian watched him leave, then looked at Kimi, incredulous. "Is he a slave?"

Kimi nodded, swallowing a mouthful of porridge. "Yes."

"Do all the slaves talk to you like that?"

Kimi huffed out an amused breath. "Definitely not," he said. "But Dan is… Dan. He's different. I've known him since he was a kid."

"He's certainly… _different."_ Sebastian didn't say anything for a minute or two, obviously thinking. "So you've worked here a long time then, sir?" he asked finally.

"Since I was thirteen," said Kimi. "I started as a stable boy."

"And this is Lord Rosberg's estate, yes?"

"It is," Kimi answered. He couldn't for the life of him remember ever actually mentioning his lordship's name in front of Sebastian, but then he probably picked it up from someone when he'd arrived, perhaps one of the other slaves. "Why?" asked Kimi.

"No reason," Sebastian said, eating his porridge. "I've just heard people talk of Lord Rosberg."

"Yeah?" said Kimi. "What did they say?"

"Nothing." Sebastian shrugged and stared down at his bowl.

Kimi knew Sebastian was trying to be tactful, but there was no need. "Usually the talk is that he's spoiled and lazy."

"And is he?"

"Yes, he is," Kimi answered. He swallowed another spoonful of porridge, chewing it thoughtfully before he went on. "But he's not a bad man."

"No?"

"Well," Kimi said, thinking of how Lord Rosberg had been when under Lord Hamilton's influence, "mostly he's not. Sometimes..." He didn't finish the thought, not wanting to recall those days. He scraped up the last of his porridge then stood up, pushing back his chair. "Read through those books today," he said. "But don't overdo it, okay? Make sure you rest."

"Yes, sir," Sebastian replied.

===

After about another week, Sebastian was strong enough to start coming downstairs for a few hours every morning. Kimi had set up a small table in the corner of the work room for him, and he sat there quietly, updating the ledgers, his pen scratching away on the thick paper.

He never said a word unless first spoken to and shrunk down into his chair as though he was trying to make himself invisible when anyone but Kimi was in the room. He seemed especially on edge whenever Lord Rosberg paid one of his infrequent visits, but then Kimi supposed that made sense. Lord Rosberg was an overwhelming personality at the best of times, and on the rare occasions he deigned to appear in the work room and dormitory he was generally on his most condescending behavior. 'Spot inspections', he liked to call the visits, but Kimi knew perfectly well he was just sniffing around for fresh meat, trying to reacquaint himself with the current roster of slaves and reminding himself of any former favorites he had since forgotten about.

He hadn't spoken of Sebastian again since his arrival, and Kimi was fairly sure he'd forgotten the incident. His lordship's attention span was not one of his finer qualities, and he never seemed to notice Sebastian lurking in the corner with his books. Which, Kimi thought, was probably best for everyone.

He got the distinct impression that, despite his seeming timidity, Sebastian never actually missed a single detail of what went on. He was always _listening_ , Kimi could tell, soaking up each conversation that occurred in the room, observing every last nuance of the atmosphere. He never commented on any of it, and Kimi sometimes wondered what he was thinking, though he never asked.

And while Sebastian was more than willing to work the same hours as everyone else, Kimi insisted that he still take the afternoons off. Every day at lunch time he'd walk Sebastian back upstairs, just to make sure. Sebastian would sometimes look at him sideways as they made their way through the corridors. "I know the way," he said. "I can actually make it up the stairs by myself."

"I know," Kimi replied, and Sebastian didn't say anything, but Kimi could see the corner of his mouth quirk up, the movement so slight it was almost imperceptible. And yet, Kimi noticed.

Their routine was to take their meal together with minimal talk, and then Kimi would leave Sebastian alone in their room with strict instructions to rest, and go downstairs to finish off his day.

Kimi couldn't remember when he'd started thinking of it as _their_ room, but that was how he regarded it now, and he was self-aware enough to realize that fact meant he was in dangerous territory. He'd shielded his heart so carefully and for so long that it had become second nature, yet here he was. And while he knew he'd never take advantage of a slave, whatever the circumstances, he hadn't ever thought to consider what it might mean to become _friends_ with one.

That was something he hadn't even conceived of as _possible_.

When he came back down to the work room, Heikki was standing at Sebastian's desk, flicking through the ledgers he'd been working on. Like Kimi, Heikki tended not to speak unless he had something to say, so when he did speak Kimi always took note. "This guy's good," Heikki remarked as Kimi sat down. "Better than me."

"Better than both of us," Kimi said.

"I thought he was a bargain?" Heikki asked. "Surely he wouldn't have been so cheap if the traders had known he had these skills."

"They didn't know."

"So you didn't know either?" said Heikki. "When you bought him?"

"No," Kimi said. "I didn't."

"A happy coincidence, then."

"I suppose so."

Heikki looked at Kimi, a careful, guarded expression on his face. "And he's sleeping in your room, isn't he?"

"He was too sick to go in with the others when he arrived."

"Hmm," Heikki mused. "But he's not sick anymore?"

"He's better than he was, yes."

"But he's still in your room."

_Just come out and fucking say it_ , Kimi thought, but he knew perfectly well that Heikki was diplomatic to a fault, so he pre-empted the unspoken question, saying, "I'm not using him, if that's what you're asking."

"No," Heikki replied. "That wasn't what I was asking."

"Good."

"You know," Heikki said, "when I first started working here, someone told me not to get too attached. 'Care enough to do your job well, but absolutely no more,' I think they said. 'Know your limits.'"

"I told you that," Kimi said.

"You did," Heikki replied evenly."And it was good advice."

"Yes." Kimi suddenly felt the need to look away before he added, "It _was_ good advice."

Perhaps it was advice he needed to take.


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sebastian helps Kimi at the stables, and they go to the bathhouse together.

A few mornings later Kimi was making his way back upstairs as usual. He'd nearly reached the door to the room when he stopped, puzzled. He could swear he heard voices coming from within. _Odd,_ he thought, and paused before he showed himself, listening carefully. He could hear Dan talking and laughing, and when he peered around the corner, making sure he remained unseen, he saw him sitting at the table facing Sebastian, gesturing wildly as he spoke.

Dan's back was towards the door, so Kimi had a good view of Sebastian's face. He was smiling a little, and when Dan reached the punchline of whatever story he was telling, Sebastian laughed. It wasn't a belly laugh, nothing like Dan's hearty guffaw at his own joke, as it was hesitant and tentative, but warmth flooded through Kimi at the sound of it.

Sebastian suddenly noticed him lurking outside the door and for a moment he seemed uneasy, as if he'd been caught doing something he shouldn't. He looked questioningly at Kimi, who nodded reassuringly.

"Hey," Kim greeted the two of them, entering the room.

"Oops," Dan said, standing up with a guilty expression. "Sorry, just having a bit of a yarn with Seb here."

"Do you ever do any work?" Kimi asked gruffly, playing up his grumpiness in that way he knew Dan liked.

"Nope," he replied happily. "Not if I can help it."

Kimi shook his head. "You're so lazy."

Dan clutched his chest theatrically. "Oh wow, I'm hurt. I'm like, wounded."

"Good."

Dan laughed as he headed for the door. "Don't mess with the Iceman, Seb," he said, as he walked out, grinning. "Watch yourself, dude."

"Iceman?" Sebastian asked when Dan was gone.

"It's his joke," Kimi answered. "He says I like to pretend I'm cold as ice, that nothing gets to me."

"You're not cold," said Sebastian. He looked up at Kimi almost shyly, his eyes shining. It had been nearly a month since Sebastian had arrived and the change in him was remarkable. His hair was no longer dull and dirty, but softly tousled waves of yellow-golden blonde. He was still thin, but had lost that starved, desperate look, and there was now a healthy, ruddy glow in his cheeks. Even his mouth looked different, his lips now fuller, so red that you could swear they were stained but Kimi knew better.

Kimi lately often found himself thinking about that mouth, what it would feel like pressed close against his own, whether Sebastian's lips would open, if his tongue would slide soft into Kimi's mouth… _No._ Kimi stopped himself, banishing the images from his mind. He wasn't going to indulge himself by going down that road, even only in his imagination. 

Sebastian was a slave, a person who worked for him and nothing more.

Kimi changed out of his stable-smelling clothes, then sat down at the table, eating breakfast with Sebastian. Neither of them spoke for a while, but then Sebastian said, "Where do you go in the mornings?"

Kimi sighed to himself. His life used to be a lot more peaceful than this, but somehow he didn't really mind. "You ask a lot of questions," he pointed out.

"Sorry, sir," Sebastian said. "I was just curious."

Kimi got the distinct feeling that Sebastian wouldn't give up, and that he may as well answer. "To the bathhouse."

Sebastian looked at him skeptically. "Nowhere else?"

"The stables."

Sebastian nodded. "Do you keep your own horses?"

"No." 

"Then why do you go there?"

"I work, I help clean out the stalls," Kimi said, knowing Sebastian wouldn't understand.

"That's part of your job?" Sebastian asked, disbelieving. "You have to do it?"

"I don't have to, I want to."

Sebastian stared at him as if he was insane. _"Why?"_

"I just…" Kimi wasn't even sure how to explain it to a slave, that he did work he didn't need to do, for no other reason than because he chose to. "I sit at a desk all day, if I didn't do some kind of exercise I'd go crazy."

"Oh," said Sebastian, clearly trying to digest this information. After a minute, he spoke again. "Would you like me to help you?"

"It's exercise," Kimi said. "It's not my job, I don't need any help."

"It might build up my strength?"

"It's fine," Kimi said firmly.

Sebastian looked down at the table. "Maybe I'd like to help you, sir," he said softly.

"Just concentrate on your own work," Kimi replied, trying to sound kind, but he could hear his own impatience bleeding through into the words. He knew Sebastian meant well but Kimi's efforts to stay professional, keep the man at a proper distance weren't made easy by Sebastian's eagerness to be of assistance.

And if he was honest, Kimi wasn't really used to people wanting to be around him too much. He could be difficult, he knew that. He was sure that Sebastian was just grateful, trying to make himself indispensable enough that he wouldn't be sent back to the market, but it was still unsettling.

"Yes, sir," Sebastian said.

===

The next morning Kimi was down in the stables, shovelling out one of the stalls, enjoying the mindlessness of the task, the way his mind stopped running for once, forgetting all the stresses of life as felt his body work. The muscles in his back and arms were warm with exertion and he soon fell into a rhythm.

He felt himself shiver involuntarily. He could feel something, he was certain, someone's gaze… He turned quickly, unnerved at the sensation and saw a pair of blue eyes peering with nervous determination over the stall divide. For a split second Kimi felt unsteady, something _almost_ coming together in his mind. There was a memory there, he was sure, some lost recollection from his past, but before he could think any further, Sebastian stepped out from behind the divider. He was smiling sheepishly but Kimi could see the stubborn set to his jaw. There was no getting rid of the man, it seemed.

Kimi made a show of sighing loudly with exasperation, but deep down he knew he was happy to see Sebastian. He was _always_ happy to see Sebastian. Perhaps the problem was that he was trying too hard, Kimi thought. If he could just relax, not focus so intensely on keeping Sebastian at arm's length then maybe he wouldn't be so fixated. There was a spare shovel in the corner of the stall and he picked it up, wordlessly handing it to Sebastian. 

Sebastian tested the weight of it in his hands, then copied Kimi's grip on his own shovel. He observed as Kimi scooped up a shovelful of soiled straw and tipped it into the waiting barrow, then stepped forward, ready to take his turn. Kimi backed away enough to give him room, trying not to smile as Sebastian awkwardly pushed his shovel into the straw, managing to get a small amount to rest on the blade of it, which he transferred into the barrow with trembling arms.

"Are you sure it's not too much for you?" Kimi asked, but Sebastian shook his head.

They found a complementary tempo, with Kimi scraping up three of four shovelfuls before he would stand back and let Sebastian clumsily pick up a token amount.

The barrow was soon filled, and Kimi rested his shovel up against the side of the stall. He grabbed the handles of the barrow and turned, wheeling it out into the stableyard. It bounced over the cobblestones as he pushed it in front of him.

He could feel Sebastian walking close behind him, still holding his shovel. He stood watching as Kimi tipped the barrow up, dumping the contents on to the muck heap with practised ease. They then headed back to the stalls and began the whole process over again.

Sebastian threw another tiny scoop into the barrow. Kimi looked at him. "You know, you're not very good at this," he said.

"I've never cleaned out a stable before," Sebastian told him.

"Seriously?"

"I've always been a body slave."

"You never had to shovel up after the horses when you were a kid?" 

"No," Sebastian replied.

"Lucky you," Kimi said, but didn't think anything further of it as they kept working. 

Every time he wheeled the barrow over to the heap, Sebastian would tag along like a shadow. Kimi could see the stable workers giving them strange looks but no one said anything, and Kimi didn't feel the need to explain. 

"That's enough," he finally said. He hadn't finished his usual allotment of stalls but Sebastian was slowing him down so much that they'd be here all day if he tried for the normal number. And he didn't want Sebastian to overstrain himself now that he was at last becoming stronger.

"You coming to the bathhouse?" he asked.

"If you don't mind, sir," Sebastian said. He sniffed his clothes. "I kind of smell."

"Occupational hazard," Kimi muttered. He strode off out of the stableyard, Sebastian hurrying along beside him.

The bathhouse was deserted when they arrived, and Kimi went straight into the anteroom without pausing. He tugged his shirt off over his head, but Sebastian hesitated.

"I can undress here?" he asked, looking around cautiously. "There's no separate area for slaves?"

"Slaves are allowed in here if they're accompanied by someone," Kimi explained. "So as long as you're with me, you're okay."

Sebastian nodded and began to take off his clothes.

Kimi glanced over at him, trying to be subtle, but he was curious to see how Sebastian looked. He hadn't seen the man properly naked in a while, as Sebastian had taken to bathing in the afternoons when he was alone, but Kimi was pleased to see now that he was continuing to put on weight. The bruises and wounds were healed, a few replaced by scars, and his skin was smooth and fleshy. Hair the same golden color as on his head peppered his body, a trail of it leading down to the thicker thatch where his cock was nestled.

Kimi concentrated on undressing, but he couldn't help noticing that Sebastian was also indulging in a few sideways glances, eyes stealthily roaming up and down Kimi's body with a skittish, wavering gaze. Kimi supposed that Sebastian had never really seen him without clothes before, as though he changed in their room, he was always quick about it, never wanting to linger enough to make Sebastian uncomfortable.

They entered the main room, and Kimi picked up a pitcher of water from next to the stove, carrying it over to one of the bathing areas. Sebastian did the same, carefully balancing the heavy container in both hands as he walked across the room to stand next to Kimi. 

Kimi poured the water over himself, emptying it straight out on to his head, and the force meant some splashed on to Sebastian's legs. He jumped back, surprised. "That's freezing," he said.

Kimi only shrugged. "I like it cold."

"No wonder Dan calls you the Iceman," Sebastian said, smiling. He lifted his own pitcher, arms shaking as he struggled to raise it high enough. 

"Here," Kimi said. He took the jug from Sebastian's hands, tilting it up and pouring the contents slowly over Sebastian's body. Sebastian stepped right into the stream of warmed water, closing his eyes as it ran down over him. Kimi somewhat guiltily took the opportunity to stare, watching as rivulets of water circled Sebastian's nipples, sliding down over his stomach towards his cock.

Kimi had seen it plenty of times before, but this felt different. For a minute he let his mind wander, picturing what it must look like hard, what it would feel like inside him, but he quickly snapped back to reality when Sebastian opened his eyes and ran one hand through his wet, darkened hair. "Thanks," he said.

They both set about washing themselves, soaping up cloths and scrubbing at their bodies. After a few minutes, Sebastian asked tentatively, "Do you want me to wash your back, sir?" 

Kimi frowned at him. "That kind of thing isn't your job," he replied. "I thought I made that clear?"

"I understand that it's not my job," Sebastian said. "I know that, sir. I'm just…" he paused, as though he couldn't think of the word, but then went on. "I'm _offering_ to do it."

Kimi knew he should say no, maintain the boundaries he'd so scrupulously tried to enforce between them, but he suddenly weakened. He knew it wouldn't lead to anything else, so what could it hurt?

"Fine," he said, and turned around. 

Nothing happened for a moment, but then Sebastian started to gently rub the washcloth over Kimi's back. At first, his movements were halting and uncertain but then he began to apply more pressure, finding a rhythm as he massaged the soap over Kimi's skin in slow, deep circles. 

Kimi exhaled, closing his eyes and relaxing into the feeling of it. He remembered the first time he'd bathed Sebastian, how he'd thought about the fact that it had been so very long since he'd touched someone with any kind of tenderness or care, but it wasn't until now that he realized it had been even longer since anyone had touched _him_ in that way.

He drifted away a little, allowing himself to enjoy the sensation, and… _shit_ , he thought, looking down at himself. He hadn't been thinking, and now he was half-hard and growing.

He focused, willing his cock to deflate at least a bit before he turned to face Sebastian, but there was no hiding it. Best not to make a big deal of it, he decided as Sebastian ceased washing his back. "All done," he said. Kimi took a deep breath and turned back around. Sebastian's gaze was immediately drawn downwards. "Oh," he said softly.

He stared silently, his eyes wide. But strangely, they weren't filled with the blank, empty terror that Kimi had seen that night when Sebastian had kneeled beside him, thinking he was required to service Kimi. Yes, he seemed frightened, his body rigid with apprehension, but there was also a curiosity in his gaze, the faintest hint of interest. 

"It's nothing," Kimi said abruptly. "Turn around, I'll wash you."

Sebastian looked up at him, very obviously hesitating, and Kimi could guess why. Even though he'd never given Sebastian any reason not to trust him, old habits and trauma had to die hard, and turning his back on a guy with an erection probably wasn't something Sebastian was used to doing without reservations.

But at last he shuffled on his feet, facing away from Kimi, who began to scrub at his back. The muscles there were tight and hard under Kimi's hand, but, as he went on, he could feel them relax, starting to loosen. Sebastian leaned back just slightly into the touch, his shoulders falling as his tension began to ease.

Kimi was careful to mostly concentrate on Sebastian's upper back, not wanting to trigger any adverse reaction by going lower. He felt as if he'd be happy to just stand here forever in the quiet, still room, listening to the slick sounds of the soap and Sebastian's hushed breaths in and out, but finally he stopped.

"Thank you, sir," Sebastian said.

"You're welcome," Kimi replied. He rinsed himself off with another jug of water, the cold pretty effectively killing what remained of his hard on, and again helped Sebastian with his own pitcher.

They dried themselves and dressed in the anteroom in silence, until Kimi asked, "Are you okay? That wasn't too much for you?" He knew what he meant, but he didn't want Sebastian to misinterpret his words, so he added. "All that shovelling is hard work, I know."

"No," Sebastian said. "It's good." He nodded, stating firmly, "I'm fine."

"Good," said Kimi.


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kimi goes to the market, Dan gets a surprise.

Sebastian was certainly a lot more stubborn that Kimi would have ever given him credit for, as from then on he followed Kimi down to the stables every morning. His shovelling technique still left an awful lot to be desired, but he seemed to be becoming stronger. Getting outside every day was probably doing him good as well, Kimi thought.

He also continued to offer to wash Kimi's back every morning at the bathhouse and Kimi, weak as he was, continued to let him. But at least now he was prepared for the reaction it caused in him, and could mostly stop himself getting hard when Sebastian touched him.

The only bad thing about Sebastian helping every morning was that Kimi now had no time alone whatsoever, no privacy at all. He'd had to start jerking off in bed late at night when he was sure Sebastian was asleep, which wasn't exactly ideal, but he managed.

A few days later, they'd made their way back upstairs as usual and Kimi was changing his clothes. He rummaged through the cupboard, picking out his cleanest, least-worn pair of breeches and his best shirt.

"Dressed up today, sir?" Sebastian asked, watching as Kimi laced up the breeches.

"I'm going out," Kimi replied. "Market day."

"Will you be selling anyone?" Sebastian's voice was oddly faint and strained, but Kimi didn't think anything of it.

"Yeah, a few," said Kimi. He looked up and saw that Sebastian was white as a sheet, the color almost completely drained from his face. For a second Kimi couldn't work out why, but then he realized what he'd said. Sebastian had no way of knowing if Kimi meant _he_ was being sold on.

"Oh no," he said. "Not you. Some of the others. Don't worry, I won't let that happen if I can help it."

Sebastian let out a relieved breath. "Sorry," he said. "I just... wasn't sure."

"No, these are all body slaves." Kimi pulled on his boots and then sat up. "His lordship always needs fresh amusement," he said, as sarcastically as he dared.

Sebastian put one hand on his hip, lifted the other in a dismissive wave. His upper lip curled in a condescending sneer. "Kimi," he said in a note-perfect imitation of Lord Rosberg's usual haughty tone, "I need some new boys, why do we have no new boys? Fetch me someone pretty I haven't used in a while, won't you?"

Kimi barked out a startled laugh. "Ha!" he said. "You should do that for Dan, he'd love it."

Sebastian grinned back at him, all trace of his lordship gone from his face. "You know," he said, "Dan does a pretty good impersonation of you."

"Yeah, I've heard him," Kimi said, smiling. "And it's not that good."

"You do have a very…" Sebastian gave him a sly look. "A very _distinctive_ voice."

"I've always talked like that," Kimi replied. "It's helpful, it intimidates people." He stood up, tucking in his shirt and smoothing down the front of it. "What?" he asked, realizing Sebastian was still looking at him.

"It's just…" Sebastian shook his head. "I've never heard you laugh before. I don't think I've ever even seen you smile."

Kimi shrugged. "Not much to smile about in this life, I guess."

"Maybe not, sir." Sebastian gave Kimi an appraising glance, then went over to the cupboard. Hanging on the handle was a red kerchief that Kimi never wore, and Sebastian picked it up. He walked behind Kimi, looping the cloth around his neck and knotting it at the back. Kimi didn't like to protest, so he stood there, waiting patiently as Sebastian moved around to face him, straightening the kerchief until it was sitting to his satisfaction. 

"Doesn't it bother you?" he asked quietly, serious now.

"Doesn't what bother me?"

"You just seem…" Sebastian frowned. "The way you treat slaves, it's different to anyone I've ever met. And taking them to the market, selling them…" He didn't finish, but Kimi knew exactly what he was saying.

Kimi shifted the kerchief, moving it from side to side. It felt a little extraneous to his usual practical style, and he wasn't sure he liked that. He knew he was avoiding Sebastian's question, but there was no easy answer. "Yes," he finally said. "It bothers me. I deal with it, but I don't like it at all."

"Then why do you do it?"

"It's my job."

"But you're free," Sebastian told him, "you don't have to do that, you could do whatever you want."

"Even free men have to eat," Kimi pointed out. 

"But you have a choice."

"Perhaps." Kimi wasn't interested in deabting the matter. He had more of a choice than a slave like Sebastian, of course he did, but that certainly didn't mean he could do whatever he wanted. He fussed with the kerchief again and thought about taking it off, but he didn't want to hurt Sebastian's feelings. "If I'm not going to be around today," he said, "maybe you should stay up here." Kimi didn't want Sebastian coming to Lord Rosberg's attention if he could help it.

"Okay," Sebastian said. "I don't mind."

"I'll send Dan up," Kimi said, "and I'll be back this evening." Leaving Sebastian alone somehow made him feel uneasy. The guy was a grown man, and yes, he was no longer so weak and sickly but Kimi knew he was still vulnerable. He hovered for a minute, finally telling himself he was being stupid and leaving the room. "I'll see you tonight, then," he said.

"Bye, sir," Sebastian called out from behind him, and Kimi had to force himself to keep walking, not go back.

And all the way into the market, Kimi couldn't stop thinking, wondering what Sebastian was doing, if he was okay. Kimi sat beside the driver at the front of the cart, idly watching the countryside go by. They made their way through some of the nearby villages, and Kimi remembered what Sebastian had said about being free. The people who lived here were free, but as far as Kimi could tell, their existences were mostly ones of grinding poverty. The houses were roughly built and seemed in need of serious repair, the streets muddy. But maybe he was too quick to judge, Kimi thought, as he looked closer. He could see a few tiny but productive-looking vegetable patches at the rear of some of the houses, one or two cows. There were a few children playing outside and they appeared reasonably well-fed, their patched clothes fairly clean.

Perhaps it was possible to make a life outside of the protection of someone like his lordship, but Kimi had his doubts. He sat back in his seat, thinking about Sebastian.

===

When they finally arrived, Kimi surveyed the market, trying to get a feel for who was available today. He suddenly noticed Mark, Viscount Coulthard's man, the one who had bought Jev. Kimi looked around quickly, but he couldn't spot Jev tethered anywhere. And yet Viscount Coulthard didn't keep enough body slaves that they needed to be replaced every month, so Mark being back again today probably wasn't a good sign for Jev's chances.

"Hey," Mark said as he approached Kimi, holding out his hand. 

"Morning," Kimi replied, shaking Mark's hand firmly. 

"That's some fancy neckwear you've got happening there," said Mark, giving Kimi's kerchief an amused look.

Kimi had forgotten he was even wearing it. He pulled at it embarrassedly, trying not to feel awkward. "So how's that slave you bought from us last month been going?" he asked, changing the subject.

"Oh, he's great," Mark said. "No, he's a good little worker that one. It's not easy with my boss, you know." He smiled ruefully. "You need someone who's enough of a top for him the bedroom but won't give you attitude outside of it. Not easy to get, but Jev's been a real find for us."

"Good," Kimi said, relieved. "That's good to hear."

"Actually that's what I wanted to talk to you about," Mark said. "Viscount Coulthard's taken quite the shine to Jev, and the kid's been getting in his ear about one of your other slaves…" Mark pulled some notes out of his pocket, checking them. "Dan?"

Kimi narrowed his eyes warily. "Dan's not a body slave," he said.

"Oh yeah, I get that," Mark replied. "We'd be interested in him as straight up a household slave."

"Really?" asked Kimi. "Viscount Coulthard thinks that much of Jev? He'd just buy Dan on Jev's say so?"

"Mate, in the current state of play, whatever makes Jev happy makes the boss happy," said Mark.

"But he'd go that far?"

Mark laughed. "Right now I reckon he'd go to the ends of the earth and back to make sure he got Jev's dick up his arse on a regular basis."

Kimi still wasn't convinced. "I'm pretty sure Dan and Jev were more than friends," he said. "That wouldn't bother the Viscount?"

"Nah," said Mark. "He knows that, doesn't care. And he's prepared to pay."

Mark named a figure that made Kimi's eyes widen. It had to be at least five times what a common household slave like Dan was worth. "Well," he said, trying not to react too obviously, because that really was a _huge_ amount of money, "I'm not in charge of the household slaves, so I'll have to talk to Herr Wolff when I get back tonight, see what he thinks." He'd have to talk to Dan too, but he wasn't going to tell Mark that.

"No worries," Mark said. "Just send word when you've decided, yeah?" They shook hands on the proposed deal. "See you in the tavern later?" asked Mark.

"Of course," Kimi replied. As Mark walked away, he untied the kerchief and stuffed it in his pocket.

===

When Kimi got home that evening, he went straight upstairs, where he found Sebastian and Dan chatting. "Sorry," Dan said, standing up. "I was just going."

"No," Kim told him. "Sit down, I need to talk to you."

Dan smiled nervously. "That sounds kind of ominous," he said, but sat back down. 

Sebastian seemed to sense that this was serious, and he stood up, moving aside in the pretence of giving them privacy.

Kimi took a deep breath and said to Dan, "Today at the market, someone made an offer on you."

"On me?" There was an edge of fear in Dan's voice. "Am I… for sale? Have I done something wrong?"

"No, no," Kimi reassured him. "Nothing like that. It's Viscount Coulthard, the man who bought Jev last month. He's interested in you. And not as a body slave," Kimi hastened to add. "Just as a normal household slave."

"What?" Dan said, confused. "How does he even know about me?"

"Apparently Jev's been telling him about you."

"And now he wants to buy me?"

"Yes," said Kimi.

"And I'd get to be with Jev again? For real?" The desperate hope in Dan's voice could have broken Kimi's heart.

"Well, I'll have to talk to Herr Wolff first, and get his approval, but for the money they're offering for you, I don't think he'll refuse."

"Then yes." Dan nodded quickly. "Yes, I want to go."

"Think about it, Dan," Kimi told him. "Don't just say yes. Jev's a body slave, and in Viscount Coulthard's household that's something very different to here." Kimi looked at Dan seriously. "You need to understand that. The Viscount keeps very few slaves and from what I was told, he has an extremely close relationship with Jev." Kimi felt harsh having to point out the realities, but he knew Dan could be starry-eyed about things. "For the time being you'll probably have to come second to Jev's duties with the Viscount. That won't be easy."

"I don't care," Dan said passionately. "I don't care, I just… I just want to be with him. He's my best friend and I don't care about the rest of it."

"Okay," Kimi said. "Then I'll talk to Herr Wolff."

"Thank you so much."

"Thank me when Herr Wolff says 'yes'," Kimi warned.

"I will, but can I give you a hug now?" Dan said, grinning from ear to ear.

Kimi rolled his eyes. "No, you can't."

"Always the iceman." Dan laughed, and jumped up out of his seat. "Well, I have to give someone a hug, so I'm going to hug Seb."

Kimi had almost forgotten Sebastian was still in the room. He was standing to one side, smiling, and Dan rushed up to him, sweeping him up into an enthusiastic hug. Kimi noticed that he flinched just slightly as Dan wrapped his arms around him, but then relaxed fully into the embrace, hugging Dan back tightly. "Congratulations," he said, patting Dan gently on the back.

"Thanks, Seb," Dan said, stepping away. "That means a lot."

"Okay," Kimi said. "I saw a light in Herr Wolff's work room when I came up, so I'll go and see him now."

Dan trailed after him as he headed downstairs. Kimi stopped him at the end of the hallway that led to Toto's room. "Stay here," he said. "I don't want you eavesdropping, okay? I don't know what I might have to say."

"No problem," Dan said. The words belied the look on his face, which was almost sick with anticipation.

"Sit tight," Kimi told him. "I shouldn't be long."

He walked down the hall and knocked at Herr Wolff's door, which was slightly ajar."Come in," he called, and Kimi entered the room.

Toto looked up from his work. "Good evening, Kimi," he said. "What can I do for you?"

"Evening," Kimi said and briefly explained the situation, outlining the offer without as yet mentioning the price. 

"Which one's Dan?" Toto said, thinking. "Oh, the one who's always smiling?"

"That's him," Kimi replied.

"But he's just an ordinary slave, surely?" asked Toto, puzzled. "What does the Viscount want with some random house slave?"

Kimi shrugged, trying to seem casual about the whole deal. "He bought one of our body slaves last month and the guy's been talking him up. It's a very good offer."

Kimi told him the figure, but lowballed it a little, down to around two thirds of the actual number Mark had told him.

Toto whistled softly even at that. "Well, if he wants him that badly, I might add another five hundred, see if he bites."

Another five hundred brought the price to almost exactly what the Viscount was offering. "I'm certain he'll agree to that," Kimi said.

"More fool him then," Toto replied. "But I'll accept that. The boy will have to finish out the month here, but I'll draw up a bill of sale in the morning."

"Thanks," said Kimi.

"You're welcome." Toto went back to his work. "If you can get a price like that every time, you can sell the whole household if you like."

Kimi strode back up the hall to where Dan was waiting, practically vibrating with anxiety. "What happened?" he asked.

"He says you have to finish out the month, but yes, you can go."

Kimi had expected Dan to be overjoyed, but instead his face screwed up like a small child and he suddenly burst into tears, his shoulders heaving with panting sobs. "Okay," he said shakily, "I really am going to have to hug you now."

This time Kimi didn't protest as Dan grabbed him, clinging to him like a limpet, his face pressed up against Kimi's shoulder as he wept breathlessly. Kimi rubbed his back, waiting for him to finish. The poor kid was overwhelmed, and Kimi couldn't blame him.

"I'm sorry," Dan said, pulling away, wiping his nose on his sleeve and sniffing. "I'm just… I miss him _so_ much and I never thought I'd see him again."

"It's okay," Kimi said. "I understand." He pulled the kerchief out of his pocket and handed it to Dan, who blew his nose on it loudly. He offered it back to Kimi, who shook his head. "Keep it."

"I don't know how to thank you," Dan said. "I really don't." 

"You deserve to be happy," Kimi said.

Dan shrugged bashfully. "Maybe," he said. "I hope so." He looked at Kimi. "You deserve to be happy too, you know."

Kimi smiled at him, wanting to be kind. "I think I'm too old for that."

"Well, yeah," Dan said, smiling back, "you are pretty ancient."

"Thanks."

"But Seb…" said Dan thoughtfully. "Seb really likes you."

"No he doesn't," Kimi said.

"Yeah, he does."

"It's just because I looked after him."

"No," Dan said, "it's more than that."

"So what if it is?"

"So maybe you should melt that ice a bit, let someone in."

"Sebastian's a slave," said Kimi.

"I'm a slave."

"That's not the same thing."

"But we're friends, aren't we?" Dan grinned. "I mean, I know you like to pretend we're not, but we are."

"I guess."

"So why can't you be friends with Seb?"

"Because you're not just talking about being friends, and it wouldn't be right."

Dan shook his head. "You're too hard on yourself, dude. No one's perfect and _everyone_ gets lonely." He elbowed Kimi gently in the ribs. "Even you."

"Whatever," Kimi said and Dan laughed.

"See you in the morning," he said, walking off.

When Kimi arrived back upstairs, Sebastian was pacing up and down the room nervously. "What did Herr Wolff say?" he asked as soon as he saw Kimi.

"He agreed to the terms," Kimi answered. "Dan will be here for a few more weeks, and then he'll go to Viscount Coulthard's."

"That's amazing for him," Sebastian said. He stopped, staring down at the floor for a second. "I'm going to miss him."

"Yeah, me too."

Sebastian looked up at Kimi, his eyes deep and earnest. "That was a good thing you did, sir."

"It's not a big deal."

"No," Sebastian stated. "It _is."_

"It's nothing," Kimi said.

He saw Sebastian open his mouth, about to say something else, no doubt ready to contradict Kimi again, but then he seemed to change his mind and stayed silent.

They ate dinner quietly and then turned in early. Kimi lay on his side, facing away from the corner where Sebastian slept. It had been a long, stressful day and he needed some relief. He waited, counting to a hundred in his head until he heard Sebastian's breathing even out and deepen with sleep.

 _Finally_ , Kimi thought, and took hold of his cock, stroking it roughly. He wasn't in the mood to take his time so he got himself off as fast as possible, barely even thinking of anything, just concentrating on the physical sensations until he came, release washing over him. He cleaned himself up with a cloth he'd left ready by the bed, then turned over, shifting around until he was perfectly comfortable and ready for sleep. He exhaled contentedly.

"Good night, sir," Sebastian suddenly said.

Kimi froze, unable to speak. He swallowed hard, trying desperately to find his voice, hoping to sound as normal as he could.

"Good night, Sebastian," he said.


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lord Rosberg finally notices Sebastian.

The next morning, the two of them followed their usual routine and nothing appeared amiss. Sebastian didn't say anything about hearing Kimi the previous night and he didn't hesitate to touch Kimi when they were together in the bathhouse, so perhaps it wasn't such a big deal as Kimi feared. Least said, soonest mended, Kimi's mother had always said, and he decided to follow that advice and not broach the subject. He was embarrassed that Sebastian had caught him, yes, but he was more concerned about making Sebastian feel uncomfortable and as long as that hadn't seemed to happen, he'd prefer to let things go.

Lord Rosberg was entertaining Count Hulkenberg and several of his friends as guests for a few days, so Kimi and all the staff and slaves were kept busy. The Count was not a man of excessive tastes but his cock was so large that it was sometimes too much for the less experienced of the slaves and Kimi had to keep a close eye on their well-being, making sure no one was used too harshly. 

Another group of slaves were brought back downstairs after their time in his lordship's chambers, and Kimi checked them over quickly. They seemed exhausted but otherwise fine, and Kimi sent them off to the bathhouse to be cleaned up. He noticed Max, one of the slaves he'd bought at the same time as Sebastian, walking with his usual swagger. He'd had an attitude problem right from the start, that one. Lord Rosberg usually very quickly took slaves like Max in hand, taking great pleasure in breaking their defiant natures, but he didn't seem to be trying too hard with Max as he was still troublingly arrogant. But he was yet to cause any problems, so Kimi only watched him closely.

And life was gradually beginning to settle into what felt like a good rhythm. Sebastian was now spending full days downstairs working, and he and Kimi would always walk back upstairs together after they were finished for the evening. They still took their meals in their room, often talking as they ate, and Kimi was surprised to find he enjoyed the relief from silence. He'd never been one for unnecessary words, but felt comfortable around Sebastian, enough that he could relax and let down his guard just a bit. They rarely discussed anything of any importance, mostly only making idle small talk, but it was nice.

Kimi knew he had to always be careful about any deeper feelings or hint of physical interest but still, he was finding himself more and more at ease around Sebastian, and it wasn't such a bad thing.

When Count Hulkenberg finally left early one morning, Kimi heaved a sigh of relief. It would be days before they could catch up on all the work they'd gotten behind on, but at least now they had some breathing room.

Lord Rosberg, of course, had other ideas as later that afternoon he wandered casually into the work room. He was barefoot, wearing loosely laced breeches that hung off his narrow hips and a cream silken shirt open across his chest. "My lord," Kimi said, acknowledging him, but his lordship only nodded dismissively, walking over to lean backwards against the front of Kimi's table, lounging there like an artist's model striking a pose.

"I'm bored," he announced. "Do we have anyone new?"

"I believe you and the Count went through the entire roster during his stay," Kimi replied.

Lord Rosberg smiled. "We certainly did enjoy ourselves," he said wistfully. He scanned the room off-handedly, and suddenly his attention was drawn to Sebastian, sitting working quietly at his table in the corner. _Fuck_ , thought Kimi. He knew his lordship would have to notice Sebastian eventually, but he'd been hoping to put that moment off for as long as possible. "Oh _my_ ," said his lordship, standing up. He walked slowly towards Sebastian's desk like a hunter stalking its prey. "Who's this? He's new, surely?"

"He's my assistant," Kimi answered. He kept his voice steady even as his blood ran cold as ice with dread. He knew that if he overreacted in any way it was highly possible that his lordship would take Sebastian merely out of petty spite, just to teach Kimi a lesson. And Kimi wasn't going to let that happen. 

"Assistant?" Lord Rosberg asked. "This isn't that broken down thing you showed up with last month?"

"Yes," Kimi replied simply.

"My goodness," said his lordship. "Well, well, didn't you clean up nicely?"

Kimi could see Sebastian staring fixedly down at his work, his shoulders hunched and head lowered, almost shrinking in on himself as Lord Rosberg approached him, step by step. "Is he a good assistant, then?" he queried.

"He's very good." Kimi was also aware that Heikki was in the room, and though he was pretending to focus on the books he was working on, Kimi knew him well enough to be able to tell he was observing closely.

" _Very_ good," his lordship echoed. "That's pleasing to hear, because I'm always in need of some very good assistance." He looked Sebastian up and down lasciviously and then grabbed his wrist roughly, dragging Sebastian's hand towards him, putting it on his crotch and rubbing it over himself. He slowly moved his hips against Sebastian's palm, grinding up with a soft grunt. Sebastian didn't struggle or resist in any way, not even removing his wide-eyed gaze from the work in front of him, but Kimi could see his chest rising and falling with panicked breaths.

"Please don't do that," Kimi said evenly.

"Why not?" Lord Rosberg said. "Look at him, he likes it."

"He doesn't like it and he's not a body slave."

His lordship leered at Sebastian suggestively. "Well, maybe he needs a promotion."

"Fine," said Kimi. "Take him." He heard Sebastian gasp softly before he went on. "But replacing someone with his skills will use up my entire purchase allowance for the next three…" Kimi tilted his head, pretending to think. "Maybe even four months." He looked back down at the inventory lists on his desk. "So when you get sick of him, there'll be no one new for you. Not for quite some time. Unless, of course," Kimi added, shrugging, "you're prepared to increase your spending by a very significant amount." He knew that would hit home, as his lordship loved money almost as much as he loved fucking.

"Oh," said Lord Rosberg disdainfully. He released Sebastian's wrist, looking down at him with a faint sneer. "Well, I suppose he's a bit old, isn't he?" He wandered back across the room to stand in front of Kimi's desk, running one fingertip along the edge, up and down. "You never did like sharing, did you, Kimi?" he said, lightly, but there was an undertone of venom to the words that Kimi recognized all too well. 

He looked up, meeting his lordship's gaze calmly. "He's not mine to share," he said. "I'm not fucking him."

"Of course you're not." Lord Rosberg smiled, his eyes hard and bitter. "That wouldn't be _right_ , would it?"

"No, it wouldn't." Kimi didn't look away, knowing that if he wanted to protect Sebastian, he needed to not be the one who backed down. Lord Rosberg had always been someone who could instinctively sense even the slightest weakness, and Kimi wasn't going to cede to him here.

"Fine," his lordship said at last. He turned, stalking out the door. "Pick someone," he said, not looking back. "Send them up, I don't care who."

The air was heavy with tension as he exited and neither Heikki, Sebastian or Kimi spoke for a minute, but then Sebastian leapt to his feet, rushing out of the room. Kimi followed almost immediately. He could _feel_ Heikki watching and judging him, but he didn't care.

He walked down the hall and found Sebastian in the stairwell around the corner at the end. His weight was back against the stone wall as he bent over, his hands resting on his thighs, breathing in and out rapidly with a harsh whining sound, as if he couldn't get enough air no matter how hard he tried.

Kimi didn't say anything and didn't touch him. He stood next to Sebastian, leaning against the wall with his hands behind him, waiting for Sebastian to start to calm. Eventually his breathing began to slow a little, but he was still gasping as he spoke. 

"Sorry, I can't… it's just…" He gulped in a breath. "I can't help it, I can't."

"It's okay," said Kimi. "Take your time." He stood patiently, and after some time, Sebastian became more composed.

"Thank you," he said quietly, his voice shaky and weak. "For what you said."

"It's nothing." Kimi thought for a minute about what he was going to say next, whether it was too harsh, but perhaps it was something they both needed to hear. "I'll do anything I can to prevent him from taking you," he said carefully, "but if it comes down to it, and he really makes up his mind..." Kimi stared down at the ground, hardly able to bear the idea, but he went on. "I won't be able to stop him, you know that."

Sebastian nodded. "I know."

He turned to face Kimi, standing in front of him. His face was still pale, but he was standing straighter now, his shoulders back. He'd filled out so much in the time he'd been here, and the exercise every morning meant his body was starting to broaden and firm with muscle. He looked at Kimi, his unwavering gaze making Kimi feel as if he was pinned back against the wall, unable to move as Sebastian began to lean in.

Kimi held his breath. He could have sworn the ground was shifting underneath him like a wave, everything narrowing down to the one moment when Sebastian's lips finally touched his. They were full and soft, and Kimi instinctively closed his eyes, keeping his hands laced as tight as he could behind his back, somehow knowing for certain that if he touched Sebastian, that would be the end of him. If he started, he wouldn't be able to stop, not now. 

Neither of them made any attempt to deepen the kiss but there was no need. It was perfect exactly as it was and Kimi never wanted it to end, but finally Sebastian pulled away. His lips were even redder than usual, and Kimi couldn't stop staring.

"Maybe you should go upstairs for the afternoon, get some rest," he said hoarsely.

"Maybe I should," Sebastian replied. He seemed almost on edge, not as if he regretted what had happened, but more that he'd perhaps surprised himself with his reaction. He bowed his head and said, "Thank you, sir," before walking away. Kimi stood unmoving, watching him leave, waiting until Sebastian was out of sight before he let out a breath.

He knew this was real, that they both felt it, but there was no way Kimi could act on that feeling, especially not now. He'd protected Sebastian, saved him from the attentions of Lord Rosberg and Sebastian was overwhelmed with gratitude, that was all. Kimi guessed he was the first person in a very long time who'd made Sebastian feel even remotely safe, and that had to be fucking with the man's head, making him want Kimi in ways that weren't right for either of them. 

Kimi was aware he was trying to rationalize something that was by its very nature irrational, but he had stop himself somehow. 

He went back into the work room, sat down at his desk.

"Are you sure you know what you're doing?" Heikki asked him. The words were casual, but his tone was deadly serious.

_No_ , Kimi wanted to say, _I don't know what the fuck I'm doing_ , but instead he replied, "I'm not doing anything."

"Not yet," said Heikki.

"Not ever," Kimi said firmly. He couldn't let this happen. He couldn't betray Sebastian's trust by taking advantage of him, however much he wanted it.

He couldn't.


	11. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Events are conspiring to bring Kimi and Sebastian closer and closer. Kimi keeps trying to resist but for how much longer? (Hint: not much longer after this.) Warning for an assault between two minor characters.
> 
> And sorry for being a bit slow with the update this time. :(

Kimi found himself lingering at his work that evening, even though he what he wanted more than anything was to go upstairs and see Sebastian. He could still feel Sebastian's mouth against his own, the taste of it, how soft it had been. The kiss may have been relatively chaste, but Kimi's lips still burned with it. At last, he knew he couldn't delay any longer and closed his books for the night.

Sebastian didn't say anything when Kimi entered the room, only smiling his usual quiet smile. Kimi would generally just nod in reply but tonight he smiled back. This was _home_ , he realized. For the first time since he'd left his parents' house, he'd found somewhere he truly belonged and that place was by Sebastian's side. And there was no chance Kimi was going to jeopardize that with any foolish actions. "I think I'll turn in early tonight," he said, and Sebastian didn't argue.

Days passed, and on the surface, their life continued on almost exactly as before, yet Kimi could feel the tension between them growing inexorably, minute by minute, hour by hour. What had happened hung in the air between them like something tangible, coloring their every interaction. And it wasn't only the kiss but also the encounter with Lord Rosberg. Even if they hadn't so far directly spoken of it, the two of them had drawn closer. Kimi protecting Sebastian from his lordship's attentions had somehow bound them together in a way that couldn't be undone.

Kimi kept thinking of the fact that he was due to take Dan to Viscount Coulthard's estate in a few days' time. It was against the law for a slave to travel alone and normally Kimi would send one of his staff or a guard to accompany someone who had been sold, but he felt he owed it to Dan to make sure he got safely to his new home and confirm that everything there was as it should be.

The Viscount's estate was a day's travel in distance, which meant that Kimi would have to be away overnight, and he was reluctant to leave Sebastian here by himself, especially now that Lord Rosberg had taken notice of him. But he couldn't decide if asking Sebastian to join him on the trip was asking for trouble. They would be alone together in a way they'd never been before and Kimi wasn't so sure he could resist temptation.

Early one morning they were in the stables, working as usual. Sebastian's skills had improved vastly over the past few weeks and he and Kimi had become an efficient team. Sebastian filled the barrow with one last shovelful of dirty straw and then wheeled it over to the muck heap as Kimi waited. When Sebastian returned, Kimi said, "I'll be going to Viscount Coulthard's with Dan soon."

Sebastian nodded. "I talked to him about leaving."

"Yeah," said Kimi, "I was just wondering if you'd like to come with us?" He tried not to sound too hopeful, adding, "So you can see the procedure for a transaction, the practical side of what you do with the books."

"Okay," Sebastian replied. "I'd like that, sir."

"Good." Kimi felt relieved. He was sure he could control himself if he had to, and at least he wouldn't be spending a sleepless night thinking about what could possibly happen if his lordship decided Sebastian needed to be his new toy.

They finished up at the stables and made their way to the bathhouse, as was their established routine. But today something was different. The bathhouse was almost always deserted this early in the day, but this morning there was a noise coming from inside the main room, a distressed sound of muffled sobbing. Kimi held up a hand for Sebastian to be silent, and he nodded, understanding. Kimi carefully peered around the corner of the doorway.

He saw Max, his breeches hanging low off his ass as he roughly fucked someone bent over a low, dividing wall. For a moment Kimi couldn't tell who it was, but as the two of them shifted he could see it was Pierre. The slaves were technically forbidden from associating with one another in a physical way, but provided it didn't affect their work Kimi would often turn a blind eye to any friendships that sprung up between them. Yet it was obvious there was nothing friendly about this encounter. Max had one hand clamped tight over Pierre's mouth, stifling his cries, and the other was pulling Pierre's arm viciously up behind his back. The boy was struggling desperately, but Max had him pinned tightly enough that he couldn't escape as he fucked into him with sharp thrusts of his hips.

Kimi didn't hesitate, marching over and grabbing a handful of Max's hair, dragging him backwards violently. Max yelled out in pain, then lifted his fists defensively, obviously wavering on whether or not to strike out with a punch. "Go on," Kimi told him. "Try it."

Max's hands fell to his sides, an arrogant, sullen look on his face.

"What the _fuck_ do you think you're doing?" Kimi growled, his hand still in Max's hair, yanking on it as hard as he could for emphasis.

Max winced at the pain, scowling. "It's nothing," he said boldly. "Lord Rosberg lets me fuck him all the time."

"And you think that means you have permission to take him whenever you want?"

"It doesn't matter." Max shrugged.

"Doesn't it?" Kimi snapped. "How about we go and ask his lordship for his opinion on that?"

"No!" said Max, suddenly panicked. "Please don't tell him, I won't do it again."

Kimi snorted in disgust. This kid really was a cowardly little shit. "Fine," he said, pulling on Max's hair one more time before he let him go. "Get back to the dormitory now and we'll discuss any consequences later."

Max ran his hand through his hair, giving Kimi a defiant, angry look as pulled up his pants and stalked off. 

Kimi watched him leave, shaking his head, then kneeled down beside Pierre, who had collapsed on to the floor, his knees drawn up to his chest.

"Are you okay?" Kimi asked him gently.

Pierre nodded tearfully. "Sorry," he said, "I tried to stop him but he grabbed me and…"

"It's all right." Kimi thought for a second, remembering what Max had said. "Is that true?" he questioned. "That Lord Rosberg gets him to fuck you a lot?"

"He gets Max to fuck everyone a lot," Pierre replied. "He likes that he's rough with us."

"How rough?" Kimi asked suspiciously. His lordship had better not be letting Max get carried away.

"He mostly just pretends when Lord Rosberg's watching, makes a show of it." Pierre shook his head and added quietly, "Not like today. He wasn't pretending today."

Kimi's jaw clenched with rage. Yes, he'd been keeping a close eye on Max's behavior, but he should have been more aware that something like this could happen.

"I know it shouldn't matter," Pierre said, sounding almost ashamed, "when he's fucked me for his lordship so many times, but here it's… it's _different_."

"Of course it's different," Kim told him. "What happens with his lordship is your work, and Max has no right to use you outside of that." 

He held out his hand. "Can you get up?" Pierre nodded and took hold of Kimi's hand, grimacing as he got to his feet. He straightened up his clothes with trembling hands. "Come on," Kimi said, briefly touching Pierre's shoulder and guiding him out of the room. He suddenly realized he'd forgotten about Sebastian, and glanced backwards. Sebastian was following along behind them, the nervous, fearful expression on his face enough to make Kimi's heart sink but right now he knew he needed to focus on Pierre.

There was a small infirmary off the work room, set up with a couple of beds and supplies of various medicines. It wasn't used too frequently as the slaves were generally healthy, though Kimi often remembered with a shudder how much time he'd spent in here during Lord Hamilton's stay. But today he didn't think about that, leading Pierre inside.

"Do you need me to check you?" Kimi asked. "Are you sure he didn't tear you?"

Pierre shook his head. "No, I'm just sore."

"Okay." Kimi rummaged around on a nearby bench until he found a jar of the antiseptic salve they always used on the slaves when they'd been taken roughly. He opened it, held it out to Pierre. "You want to put it on yourself?" he said.

"Yes please," Pierre replied in a subdued voice. He dipped two fingers into the jar and then reached behind himself, hand down the back of his breeches, hissing in a breath as he applied the salve.

"How about you rest in here for a while?" Kimi knew full well that Max would be skulking around the dormitory with a chip on his shoulder and he didn't want to send Pierre back in there until things had settled down.

"Thank you, sir," Pierre said, curling up on one of the beds with a sigh.

"I'll be outside," Kimi told him. "Tell me if you need anything."

He closed the door of the infirmary behind him. Sebastian was sitting at his desk in the work room, eyes wide. "If you want to go back upstairs to wash and change, you can," Kimi told him.

"I'm fine," Sebastian replied.

"Okay," said Kimi. He sat down in his chair, tried to get on with some work. He'd have to go and speak to Lord Rosberg later, but his lordship wouldn't be up and about for some time yet, and Kimi didn't want to leave Pierre unattended.

When Heikki came in, Kimi explained what had occurred, and Heikki shook his head. "That kid's been trouble from the start. Are you going to talk to his lordship?"

"I think I have to," said Kimi.

"Are you going to tell him exactly what happened?"

"No, not yet."

"Make sure he gets the message, though?" said Heikki, and Kimi nodded.

When he got word that his lordship had emerged from his chambers, Kimi left Heikki with instructions to keep an eye on Pierre, then quickly went upstairs and changed his clothes. 

He found Lord Rosberg out on his archery range, practicing with his bows. His lordship enjoyed hunting and was quite skilled at it, though he mostly found it too much effort and tended to settle for more indoor pursuits.

"My lord," Kimi said as he approached him. He nodded at the two guards who were standing nearby, and they backed away discreetly.

"I'm busy," Lord Rosberg said impatiently.

"Apologies, my lord, but I needed to talk to you about one of the slaves, Max."

"Who?" his lordship asked, not even looking at Kimi.

"He's a body slave," Kimi explained. "Big lips, attitude problem."

"Oh, _him_ ," replied Lord Rosberg, smiling smugly. "What about him?"

"Have you been getting him to fuck the other slaves a lot?"

"Yes, what of it?"

"I thought you were going to take him in hand, calm him down," said Kimi.

"Well, I will." His lordship shrugged. "Eventually. Why?"

"It's just that I've noticed a few things, with the way he's treating the other slaves, as if he has some kind of authority over them."

Lord Rosberg turned to face Kimi, his eyes narrowed. "What has he done?"

"Nothing, as far as I know," Kimi lied. He'd give Max one chance, and the kid had better make the most of it. "Nothing yet, anyway, but I get the impression that it's only a matter of time, and I'd prefer not to have any disruptions."

"Fine," his lordship said, sighing. "I'll deal with him."

"Thank you, my lord," Kimi said, bowing before he walked away.

He checked on Pierre a few more times throughout the day, but he seemed to be sleeping peacefully, and when Lord Rosberg requested some slaves to be sent up later that afternoon, Kimi made certain Max was among them. Hopefully his lordship would take what Kimi said on board and curb some of his arrogance.

When Pierre finally emerged from the infirmary, rubbing at his eyes, it was almost evening. The boy seemed at least superficially recovered from his ordeal, and Kimi sent him back into the main dormitory, asking one of guards to summon him immediately if there was any sign of distress or unrest.

It had been a stressful day, so Kimi packed up his work a little early and Sebastian, as always, tagged along beside him as he headed back upstairs. Sebastian was much quieter than normal that evening up in their room, and though Kimi didn't really want to talk about things, he knew he had to say something about what they'd witnessed. "Sorry," he said awkwardly. "About this morning. I'm sorry you had to see that."

"It wasn't your fault," Sebastian replied. He wandered over to his bed in the corner and crouched down, rearranging the blankets, shaking them out. "I've never seen you like that," he said. "I've never seen you get angry."

"Sorry," Kimi repeated. "It was just that kid…" He didn't say the words, not wanting to upset Sebastian. "I won't stand for that kind of thing."

"No," Sebastian said, turning to look at Kimi. "You were amazing."

"It's just my job," replied Kimi.

===

The next morning at the bathhouse, Kimi entered the main washing area carefully, wary of more surprises. But the place was empty, and it was just him and Sebastian. Exactly how Kimi liked it.

The two of them went through their usual routine, and Kimi felt himself relaxing into the predictability of it. Sebastian gestured for him to turn around so he could wash his back, and Kimi complied, as always taking a breath and focusing enough that he could stop himself from getting aroused. He waited for the feel of the rough cloth scrubbing against his skin, but it never came. Instead, this morning, there were soft hands that traced unhurried, indulgent circles across the muscles in Kimi's back. He gasped as clever fingers pressed into every spot that held tension, loosening and releasing in a sensuous massage.

It went on and on, and Kimi held his breath to stop himself from moaning with the pleasure of it, willing himself not to get hard, but it was too late. _Fuck_ , he thought.

A gentle kiss touched the nape of his neck, and then something brushed up against his ass. Kimi turned around quickly, shocked to see Sebastian standing there, his cock jutting out from his body, hard and proud. Kimi stared down at it, swallowing nervously. Of course he'd seen Sebastian's cock more times than he could count now, but he'd never, ever seen it even the slightest bit aroused. He'd imagined it endlessly, but those dreams were nothing compared to the reality, as it was even more magnificent than he'd pictured; long and thick and so perfect-looking that Kimi had to physically stop himself from reaching out to touch it.

"Please," Sebastian said, the word like a caress. "I want to. I trust you."

"Maybe you shouldn't trust me," Kimi replied, breathing hard with the effort to control himself.

"Maybe you should trust yourself," Sebastian whispered, moving closer.

Kimi jumped back. "No," he said. " _No."_ He rushed out of the room, quickly pulling on his clothes without even bothering to dry himself, hurrying outside, not looking back.

"No," he said again, repeating the word over and over as he strode away as fast as he could, even though there was no one to hear it but himself.


	12. Chapter 12

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kimi is still being stubborn, and Sebastian has a few things to say about that.

Kimi went straight to the work room and started on his tasks for the day, trying desperately to put Sebastian out of his mind. His clothes were uncomfortable against his still-damp skin, but he concentrated as best he could. He wasn't sure how much time passed until Sebastian entered the room, but when he did, he simply sat down at his table, picking up his work without a word.

Kimi stole a few sideways glances at him, and was relieved to see he didn't look upset. But there was something in the set of his jaw, Kimi observed, a resolute tenacity that gave Kimi the very distinct feeling that absolutely nothing had been resolved, and that Sebastian wasn't going to let this go without a fight.

He sighed internally, unsure he was strong enough for such a battle.

When Heikki came in, he didn't say anything, but stood for a second, looking back and forth between the two of them suspiciously. The tension in the air was unmissable, and Heikki wasn't one not to notice such things. Kimi only stared down at his desk, and he could see Sebastian doing the same. Heikki raised his eyebrows, but obviously decided not to ask, getting on with his own work.

Around lunch time his lordship sent down the slaves he'd had with him overnight. Kimi watched them file past as they made their way back into the dormitory, and he was pleased to see Max had lost most of his usual swagger. The boy seemed exhausted, as if he'd been very thoroughly used, and he gave Kimi a filthy, pissed-off look as he passed by, but Kimi didn't respond.

The day went on, Sebastian never losing that stubborn air, as if he was just biding his time. By evening, Kimi had to face the fact that he couldn't delay the inevitable. He walked upstairs and Sebastian followed him silently.

But the very second the door to their room was closed, he folded his arms, looking squarely at Kimi, and said, "Why not?"

It wasn't as if Kimi could pretend he didn't know what Sebastian was talking about. "Because you're a slave," he said.

Sebastian stood there, expectant, as if that wasn't a real answer. "Look," Kimi went on, "I know it's not easy but these kind of things, between someone who has more power than the other, they don't work out. They can't ever be fair."

"You sound as if you're talking from experience," Sebastian commented.

"I am," Kimi said, "and believe me, it's not worth it." He looked at Sebastian's face, the determination and strength in those eyes. Kimi would give almost anything to see no harm came to this man ever again. "I don't want to hurt you," he said.

"That's bullshit."

"Excuse me?" Kimi said, astonished, hardly able to believe what Sebastian had just said.

"That's a bullshit excuse and you know it," Sebastian replied angrily. "You're _afraid_ , you're afraid of what you're feeling."

"What I'm feeling doesn't matter." Kimi tried to stay as calm as he could. "You're a _slave_."

"I'm a _person_ ," Sebastian almost shouted, his face pale. "Just because I'm a slave doesn't mean I don't get to have feelings. I know what I want, Kimi."

" _Sir_ ," Kimi said, hating himself as he said the word. It wasn't an instinctive correction, but something he spoke deliberately with the full knowledge of exactly how cruel he was being. But perhaps this was what they needed.

"What?" asked Sebastian, not understanding.

"You're supposed to call me _sir_ ," Kimi repeated.

Sebastian's eyes were at once cold with fury. "Oh, and you'd like that wouldn't you, _sir_?"

"No, actually, I don't like it," Kimi snapped. "I don't like it at all but it's the way things are."

"It's the way things are because it's the way you choose for them to be."

"Do you think I have even the slightest bit of control over the way things are? Because I don't, Seb, I don't have control over one goddamn fucking thing in this life."

"I thought you were different, but you're just the same as all the others." Sebastian shook his head, the expression on his face one of pure disgust. "You act like you care, like you think slaves are the same as everyone else but you can't even get over yourself enough to think of me as a human being." His voice rose as he continued. "You're the big hero saving that boy yesterday and yet tomorrow you won't even _blink_ when you send him upstairs with all the others to be _raped_ for his lordship's amusement."

Kimi recoiled at the words, the feeling like a punch to the gut. "I did the best I can for him, I do the best I can for every last one of them," he said, almost hoarse with rage. "What the fuck do you think I should do? Leave and let someone who doesn't give two shits about them take over? Let them be beaten and flogged and treated like cattle? I can't fucking change what happens to them, I can only make their lives not so bad."

Sebastian looked at him. "Well, maybe that's not enough," he said.

"Maybe it isn't, but it's all I can do."

Sebastian didn't say anything, but strode over to his bed in the corner of the room and started gathering up his few clothes, wrapping them up in a blanket to form a bundle. He stood up, heading for the door of the room.

"Where are you going?" Kim asked impatiently. 

"Downstairs," Sebastian answered. "Where I should be. Where I belong, with all the other slaves."

"Fine." Kimi shrugged. "I don't give a shit what you do."

"Yes, you've made that quite clear." Sebastian paused in the doorway, hesitating as he said, his voice formal and strained, "Thank you for everything."

Kimi nodded, wanting to stop him, wanting to say anything that would fix this, but he felt paralyzed, almost as if he was outside himself, watching this happen to someone else. "Don't go to our section, will you?" he said. "Make sure you go to the household slaves' quarters, yeah?"

"I will," Sebastian replied, and walked out.

For a minute or two, Kimi only stood there, staring at the door. He could feel himself swaying slightly, his head spinning as if he might pass out, so he sat down. He didn't feel sad or lonely or lost; he didn't feel anything. He was numb, emptied out as if there was nothing left inside him.

What he needed was a drink, he decided. He thought of ringing down to the kitchen, but he knew they'd likely send up Dan, and Dan was the last… no, the _second_ last person Kimi wanted to deal with right now, so he walked downstairs himself. 

Rob and Felipe and their helpers were busy with dinner, so no one noticed him slip into the pantry and fetch himself two large jugs of the strongest ale, which he carried carefully back up to… _his_ room he supposed it once again was. The air felt cold, even though the fire was crackling in the grate. Kimi set the ale down on the table. He looked across at Sebastian's bed in the corner, and walked over, bending down to pick up and fold the bedding that Sebastian had left there. It still smelled of him, and for a moment Kimi held one of the blankets to his face, breathing in deeply. But there was nothing to be gained from being weak, he told himself, stacking the blankets in a pile and then dragging the now-bare pallet across the room and kicking it back under his bed.

He sat down at the table, poured out a mug of ale. Kimi had always enjoyed a drink, but these days he rarely partook unless it was some special occasion or he was out at the market, so it only took a few mugs before he began to feel light-headed. The feeling itself wasn't unpleasant, but the maudlin thoughts that accompanied it weren't so good.

He couldn't stop picturing Sebastian's face, how disappointed and bitter he'd looked. Kimi wanted to believe that maybe it wasn't _just_ him Sebastian was angry at, that some of his fury was more general, but he knew that wasn't true. Yes, the guy was justifiably frustrated at the system they lived under, the one that meant he was treated as nothing but property, but Kimi was the person he'd directed his outrage at, and deservedly so. He wondered how long Sebastian had been bottling all that up? His whole life, probably, Kimi thought.

Perhaps it had helped him, to express those feelings to someone in a position of power over him. Kimi could only hope so. But the worst thing was that Sebastian was right. Not just about being afraid of his feelings, but that what Kimi did in his work every day was utterly reprehensible. And yet, what he'd told Sebastian was also the the truth. He _did_ do his best for the slaves and he knew for a fact that they were mostly treated better than the vast majority of body slaves in the kingdom.

But those were just excuses, weren't they? Kimi kept drinking, mug after mug of ale until there was nothing left.

He staggered over to his bed and collapsed down on to it, face first, not even bothering to undress. Sleep overtook him, and he fell into the forgetfulness of it gratefully.

He was startled awake the next morning by a sudden crash, and sat up quickly. Bile rose in his mouth, and his head was thick with nausea. He squinted across the room, and saw Dan, slamming Kimi's breakfast bowl down on the table.

"Oh," Kimi murmured, lying back down, desperately hoping it would stop him from being sick. "Morning."

"Yeah," Dan said, his usual jovial manner completely absent. "Why is Seb down in the slave's quarters?"

Kimi winced, rubbing his eyes. "We just thought it would be better."

"Better for who?" Dan asked, and when Kimi didn't answer, he shook his head. "You know, you can be a real dick sometimes."

"Just as well you're leaving tomorrow, then," Kimi answered grumpily. "You won't have to put up with me anymore."

"Can't wait," Dan replied. "And Seb's going to work with me today, help me finish off everything." He held up his hands and said in an exaggeratedly deferential tone, "I mean, if that's all right with you?"

"I really don't care," Kimi said.

"Great, then." Dan stomped out, slamming the door behind him.

Kimi got out of bed as slowly as he could, trying to ignore the throbbing in his head. By the time he washed and changed his clothes, then swallowed a few mouthfuls of porridge, he'd started to feel slightly less foul. 

It was still relatively early, but he knew he'd only start feeling lost again if he stayed up here in this room that now seemed so deserted, so he went downstairs to start work. And yet somehow, that was only worse. Kimi sat at his table, trying to concentrate, but every time he managed to get involved enough in what he was doing that he began to forget what had happened, he'd find himself glancing up at Sebastian's empty chair, and the loss would hit him all over again, the impact of it almost physical.

After a while, Heikki came in for the day, greeting Kimi with a nod. "Where's Sebastian?" he asked curiously, looking around the room.

Kimi kept his voice as neutral as possible as he answered, "He's helping out the household staff today."

"Oh," replied Heikki. He _almost_ spoke, Kimi could see, but then stopped himself. After a minute he finally added, in a gentle tone, "It's probably for the best."

"Yes, I'm sure it is," said Kimi, swallowing down the lump in his throat.

He worked on throughout the day, trying to push away the grief that welled up inside him like a wave, but all he could think of was Sebastian, what he'd said, the exact words he'd used. Kimi repeated them over and over in his mind, and every single time the hurt was as intense as it had been last night, the pain every bit as fresh.

When at last the daylight began to fade, Kimi knew that whatever happened, he couldn't leave things like this between them, so he went straight to the household slaves' quarters.

He stood at the door, looking into the large room, not wanting to intrude by entering uninvited. Sebastian was sitting cross-legged on Dan's bed, and they were chatting and laughing together. Something clenched tight in Kimi's chest as he watched, seeing the way Sebastian smiled, the line of his throat as his head tilted back, how his hands moved as he gestured to make a point. Surely Kimi had no right to be here? He almost turned to leave, but then Sebastian glanced over, noticing him. His face immediately tensed, but not in anger, not like last night. It was more that he was suddenly guarded, on the defensive, and Kimi felt sick to know that he could cause such a reaction in him.

He leaned closer to Dan, murmuring something to him, and then stood up, walking towards Kimi. "Hi," he said, when he reached the doorway.

"Can we talk for a minute?" Kimi asked, trying not to sound as desperate as he felt.

He held his breath as Sebastian paused, very obviously considering whether or not to say _no_ , but in the end he shrugged, said, "Okay."

They walked a short way down the hall together so they could have some privacy, and when they stopped, Kimi all at once had no idea what he had planned to say. So he said the first thing that came into his head, which was, "I _do_ do my best." He knew how pathetic he probably seemed, but he didn't care. "For the slaves," he said, "I really do."

Sebastian's face softened a little. "I know," he replied. "I'm sorry I said that, I know it's not your fault and that you do everything you can."

"I try to," Kimi said doggedly.

"Yeah," Sebastian said. "You do."

Kimi leaned against the wall, feeling awkward, as if he didn't know where to put to his hands. He hated this, he hated himself for not being able to say the right thing. He'd never been good with words, especially when it came to emotions, but he tried to say what he was feeling. "I've just…" he said. "I've been on my own for a long time now."

"But there was someone once?" Sebastian asked.

"Yes."

"And he hurt you?"

"We hurt each other," Kimi replied. "Very badly." He stared down at the floor.

After a few moments, Sebastian spoke. "I'm not him."

"No, you're not," said Kimi. "But I can't stand the thought of hurting you, I just… I can't," he finished lamely.

"And what do you think you're doing now?" asked Sebastian.

Kimi had no answer to that. "Please," he said, wanting to put everything he'd ever felt into that one word. "Please come back."

"I can't," Sebastian stated. "I'm sorry, but I really need to not be around you for a while." He rested one hand gently on Kimi's arm, and Kimi shivered, electricity shooting through him at the feel of the touch. "I hope you can understand that," said Sebastian, and then walked away, into the dormitory and out of sight.

Kimi waited a few minutes, wanting to believe that this wasn't it, that Sebastian would change his mind, come back and say _forget it_ and everything would go on as before, but he stood there alone. He'd fucked things up, just like he always did. His entire life, that was all he'd ever done, fuck things up.

Back up in his room, he thought of getting some more ale, drinking himself even further into oblivion, but what would be the point? It would only be a temporary salve. And perhaps this was what he _deserved_ , to feel every last ounce of this pain, to know exactly how badly he'd shit all over probably the best thing that had ever happened to him in his whole pointless life. There was no running away from what he'd done, and he wasn't enough of a coward that he couldn't face it. 

No drinking, no escape, no relief. This was all there was: just him, alone. The same as always.

He took off his clothes, throwing them carelessly on the floor, and climbed into bed. He closed his eyes and willed himself to stop thinking.

In the early hours of the morning he was awakened, dragged out of sleep by a nagging feeling of _something_. He opened his eyes, but it was a dream, surely, it couldn't be real, because Sebastian was here, sitting on the end of Kimi's bed. He had one leg drawn up to his chest, his chin resting on his knee as he stared into the fading red embers of the fire, perfectly silent and still.

Kimi blinked hard, trying to rouse himself, but no, Sebastian was still there, silhouetted in the faint glow.

"What are you doing here?" Kimi asked sleepily.

Sebastian huffed out a laugh, short and bitter-sounding. "I don't know," he said. He turned to look at Kimi, eyes deep with sadness, and suddenly everything else fell away.

Those eyes… right from the start, from the first moment Kimi had seen Sebastian at the market, he hadn't been able to resist them. He'd been gone right from that first glance, his fate sealed as surely as if it were mapped out by something greater and more powerful than he could ever understand. 

All he wanted was to save Sebastian from ever being hurt again, but right now, Kimi was the one causing him pain. And what was he so afraid of? Perhaps they _would_ hurt each other, but surely nothing could be worse than this, the agony of denying what was between them, so real and true that Kimi couldn't even begin to remember why he'd ever tried to refuse it.

He took a deep breath and shifted over in his bed, pulling back the covers beside him in invitation.

Sebastian gave him a startled, searching look, and Kimi nodded firmly. "Yes," he said simply, his voice steady. He'd never in his life been more certain of anything than this, and he would no longer run from the truth of it. " _Yes."_


	13. Chapter 13

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Continues straight on from the last chapter with some revelations. Sorry to be slow again with updating!! :(

Sebastian got to his feet, standing beside the bed, looking down at Kimi as he slowly undressed himself. There were no doubts in Kimi's mind, all his previous hesitations faded away into nothing. This was _right_ , he knew deep in his bones, watching as Sebastian slid in under the covers beside him. They lay on their sides, facing each other, and for a second neither of them moved, only gazing at each other as if they had all the time in the world.

Kimi touched Sebastian's face, his thumb caressing over his cheekbone, and then he leaned closer. For a moment or two their mouths simply pressed together, but then their lips parted, tongues sliding together, tentatively at first but then becoming deeper and more intense. Sebastian's hand ran up and down Kimi's thigh, and Kimi followed suit, unthinkingly reaching to touch Sebastian's ass. He immediately flinched away, and Kimi quickly moved his hand back up. "Shit," he whispered. "Sorry, I forgot."

"No, I'm sorry," Sebastian replied softly, relaxing his body and settling back in. The reaction was obviously purely instinctive, only a reflex, as he didn't seem at all upset or disturbed. "It's not you. You know that, right?"

"I know," Kimi said. He ran his fingers down the center of Sebastian's chest, not wanting to go lower until he made sure, asking, "Can I touch your cock?"

Sebastian nodded, this time with a sly, eager smile, and Kimi's hand slid further down, curling around the hard, thick length, fitting so perfectly in his grasp as he stroked it, his mouth once again finding Sebastian's, open and ready. 

He shifted nearer to Kimi, throwing one leg over his hip and thrusting up against him, gasping as their cocks touched. Kimi groaned, taking them both in hand, stroking them together, his mouth against Sebastian's in a messy, desperate kiss. They moved together in absolute harmony, as if they were made only for nothing but this and each other.

Kimi could feel himself getting closer to coming, but he couldn't drag his eyes away from Sebastian. He was so beautiful like this it was almost unbearable, the way his mouth was slightly open, those red lips parted as his tongue ran across them, wetting them, the expression of ecstasy on his face as his eyelids fluttered half-closed and he cried out, hot come spurting on to Kimi's hand and stomach.

The sight of him left Kimi unable to hold back any longer, finishing himself off as fast as he could. The two of them were left panting, gradually coming down from the high of orgasm. Kimi pressed a brief kiss to Sebastian's shoulder, his breathing finally evening out.

"You okay?" he asked, worried that it might have been too overwhelming for Sebastian.

"So much better than okay," Sebastian answered, smiling.

Kimi smiled back. "One second," he said and rolled away, climbing out of the bed to grab a cloth which he dampened with warm water. He slid back under the covers and cleaned both of them off, then tossing the cloth carelessly aside and pulling Sebastian into his arms.

He kissed him softly and then leaned back. Sebastian's eyes were the clearest Kimi had ever seen them, that haunted look that had always lingered somewhere in the startling blue for once completely absent, showing only real, unclouded happiness.

"What?" Sebastian said.

"Nothing," Kimi replied, "it's just… your eyes. I always feel as if I almost recognize them."

"Oh." Sebastian blushed, the color rising so prettily over his cheeks that Kimi almost didn't notice the sheepish look that accompanied the words. But then Sebastian went on, "Well, you might?"

"What?" Kimi asked, puzzled. If he'd met Sebastian before, he was certain he wouldn't have forgotten.

"My father was Lord Vettel," said Sebastian.

"You're of noble birth?" Kimi asked, and there was something about that name, something tantalizingly familiar. There had been a Lord Vettel who'd come to stay once for about a month when Lord Rosberg's father had been alive. Kimi recalled one of his sons, a skinny, awkward little barely-adolescent boy with greasy, dirty blonde hair who… he stopped in shock. "That was _you_?"

"You remember?"

"Of course I remember, but I would never have known that was _you_." Kimi pictured the kid in his mind: crooked teeth, a face covered in angry blemishes, dressed in an ill-fitting velvet suit designed for someone far younger, obviously outgrown… he bore almost no resemblance to the man before Kimi now. "How old were you?" he asked.

"Thirteen." Sebastian shrugged. "I didn't think you'd remember me." He looked at Kimi, smiling gently. "The first day I was here you stopped Nico and his friends from beating me up." 

"I remember," Kimi replied. He'd come across Lord Rosberg and three of his more spoiled companions surrounding another, smaller boy, who they'd pushed into the muck heap outside the stables. He was curled up on the ground as the others kicked him hard, the thuds of their boots on his body making a sickening sound. "Hey," Kimi had yelled, and they'd scattered. Even though he was ridiculously spoiled and indulged, Lord Rosberg still had to answer to his father for some things in those days, so he'd run away laughing, not wanting to be caught.

Kimi remembered helping the kid to his feet, trying to clean off his clothes as best as he could then sitting beside him outside the stables, waiting to see if he was okay. He'd looked away as the boy cried for a while, then when he calmed down, sent him on his way with a friendly pat on the shoulder.

"You were so nice to me." Sebastian seemed embarrassed. "I actually… for the rest of the time we stayed here, I used to watch you." 

"Yeah, I know you did." 

"You saw me?"

"Of course I did." Kimi laughed quietly. "You weren't exactly subtle with it."

Sebastian laughed with him. "And here I thought I was so sneaky."

"God, no, you were everywhere for a while there. Always blue eyes, peering out at me from round corners, over the sides of the stalls in the stables, lurking in the kitchen."

"You didn't mind?"

"I kind of felt sorry for you," said Kimi. "You never bothered me or anything, and you were just a kid. No one else took much notice of me back then." 

Sebastian shifted on the bed, then lifted one hand, tracing his fingertips up and down Kimi's arm. "I never even knew your name. I wanted to ask someone but I knew I'd give myself away."

"Give what away?"

"That I had a huge crush on you." 

Kimi couldn't stop smiling. "And here we are now."

"Here we are." Sebastian smiled back, leaning closer, kissing Kimi again. Their mouths opened up like it was the most natural thing in the world, tongues lazily curling around each other, slow and languid. It felt as if time had stopped around them, like they were enclosed in their own, private bubble that no one could ever touch.

After a while, Kimi leaned back, Sebastian's lips chasing after him, peppering his face with kisses until he laughed again. "So if you were nobility, how did you end up a slave?" Kimi asked curiously, cursing himself as he quickly added, "I mean, if you don't mind talking about it."

"No, it's okay," Sebastian replied. "My father liked to gamble. He'd mortgaged everything we owned and when I was fifteen, his debts were sold to Baron Ecclestone." Kimi had heard talk of the Baron at the market, how feared he was. The man was utterly, cruelly ruthless when it came to money. "Our name meant nothing to him, and when my father couldn't pay, he sent in his mercenaries to take everything we owned. My parents and brothers tried to fight, and they showed them no mercy." Sebastian's eyes went misty with sadness. "They were all killed, our estate was burned to the ground, and the Baron took the land for himself as payment."

"And you were sold?"

"Not at first. The mercenaries took me with them, used me for a while." Sebastian inhaled a deep, trembling breath. "It took me a long time to… to get used to it. I always cried a lot, they found that amusing. But eventually, they sold me."

Kimi took Sebastian's hand, pressing it to his lips. What he'd been through… Kimi couldn't even begin to imagine how he'd survived. "Where did you go?"

"Nowhere good." He looked at Kimi. "Until now."

Kimi felt compelled to kiss him again, wishing with all his might that this would always be somewhere Sebastian could be safe. "I'm so sorry that happened to you," he said. "Coming from your background… it must have made it harder."

"I used to think that too," replied Sebastian. "But it's not true. It's hard for anyone, to live like that. It doesn't matter where you're from." He looked at Kimi. "What about you, where were your family from?"

Kimi shrugged. "My parents were slaves."

Sebastian stared at him, shocked. "Then how are you free?"

"They were freed before I was born. We had a little bit of land that we farmed. It wasn't much but we were happy. But they died when I was thirteen and I ended up here." He leaned in, licking at Sebastian's throat as he continued, murmuring the words into his skin. "I still have the deed to the place. Sometimes I think about going back there one day."

Sebastian moaned quietly as Kimi's tongue made its way up and over the line of his jaw. "Why don't you?"

"I don't know," said Kimi. "It's hard work, not much of a life for one person on their own."

"What about for two people?"

Kimi had to smile at that. "Maybe one day," he said. His head settled back down on the pillow, Sebastian's face pressed up against his shoulder, their arms draped over one another. Kimi kissed the top of Sebastian's head. "Early start tomorrow," he said. "Off to Viscount Coulthard's with Dan."

"Mmm," Sebastian hummed contentedly. "Can't wait."

"Me too," Kimi replied quietly. He listened to Sebastian breathe, his inhalations evening out into sleep.

This was happiness, Kimi knew, for the first time in his life. And perhaps he also knew that it wasn't always going to be like this, that there would be obstacles they'd have to face, but they'd face them together, and that was all that mattered.

===

Kimi heard the door open, the noise reaching out to him somewhere deep in sleep. There was a reason he should get up, he knew, something that he should be doing. But he was so _warm_ , so happy, but there was a niggling feeling of something... he couldn't think what it was, but then there was the sound of a loud gasp, and he realized.

"Oh my god!" Dan practically shouted with excitement. "You guys! Look at you!"

Kimi felt Sebastian laugh against his skin, then nuzzle in closer to the crook of his neck. "Go away," Kimi said, sleepily. "We're busy."

"No way, man," Dan replied, "this is like the best thing I've seen all week, you two all snuggled up." He walked over and stood at the end of the bed, looking down at them joyfully, grinning widely. "This is so good," he said, "I get to go be with Jev, and you two have each other. Happily ever after for all of us, yeah?"

"There's no such thing," said Kimi, the words an automatic response, but as he breathed in the scent of Sebastian's skin, he wasn't so sure that was the truth.

"Nuh-uh, Iceman" Dan said, shaking his head. "Pretend you're cynical all you want, dude, but I see what I see and it looks pretty happy to me." He laughed. "I always knew you were a romantic at heart."

"He really is," Sebastian stated earnestly, giving Kimi a teasing nudge.

"Shut up," Kimi told him, unable to resist leaning in to briefly kiss him, eliciting an enthusiastic _aww_ from Dan as he watched.

But when Kimi pulled away, Dan spoke firmly. "This is like the sweetest thing ever but we need to leave in half an hour so if you have to have a quickie before we go then make it really quick, yeah?"

"Fuck off," Kimi grumbled.

"Don't be late!" Dan walked out and shut the door behind him, still grinning. 

"We really do have to get up," Kimi told Sebastian. He went to move, but Sebastian dragged him back, pulling him in for a long, leisurely kiss. "Dan really will kill us if we're late," said Kimi.

"Let him," replied Sebastian.

Eventually they stumbled out of bed, washed and gulped down some breakfast, but before they could dress, Sebastian took hold of Kimi's upper arms, walking him backwards until he was leaning against the wall. Kimi only smiled, letting himself be guided and responding wholeheartedly when Sebastian started to kiss him again. He felt Sebastian's cock brush up against his thigh, and ran his fingers lightly up and down it.

"Can I…" He paused, not wanting to push Sebastian too far, too soon, but then realized that he needed to stop second-guessing Sebastian's feelings. If this was going to work, then Kimi had to trust him, be confident in the fact that Sebastian wouldn't hesitate to refuse him if he wasn't comfortable with anything. So he asked, "Can I suck you?"

"You want to?" Sebastian sounded uncertain. "Do you like to do that?"

" _So_ much," Kimi said, fervently. 

Sebastian nodded. "Okay," he said. Kimi immediately flipped them around so Sebastian was pressed back to the wall and then sunk quickly to his knees.

He should probably wait until they had more time and he could linger over this in exactly the way Sebastian deserved, but today Kimi was too impatient. He needed to taste Sebastian's cock, to feel it in his mouth. He stroked his shaft gently, up and down, then parted his lips, sucking Sebastian in and going down, the thick heft of him filling Kimi's mouth. He'd been fantasizing about this for so long, yet all those daydreams had been colored with shame and guilt. This was something else entirely, right and good and true. Sebastian's hands skimmed up over his shoulders and settled in Kimi's hair, combing through it then pulling gently as he came.

Kimi swallowed then stood up. Sebastian ran his fingers over Kimi's lips, the expression on his face one of almost wonder. He bent one leg, bracing his thigh between Kimi's legs as Kimi thrust up against him, coming almost immediately, the splashes of white dripping down Sebastian's skin.

"Sorry," he said.

"Don't be," replied Sebastian.

All Kimi wanted to do was stay here in this room for the rest of the day, but they both owed Dan better than that. "Come on," he said, wiping Sebastian off.

They dressed, and made their way down to the front courtyard where Dan was waiting with a horse harnessed to a small, two-wheeled cart. " _Finally_ ," he said, rolling his eyes. "Thought I was going to have to go back up there and drag you off each other."

"Stop complaining," Kimi told him, as Sebastian smiled. The two of them climbed in, Kimi in the driver's seat and Sebastian in the back with Dan. Kimi took the reins, slapping them against the horse's back. "Let's go," he said, and they set off.


	14. Chapter 14

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kimi, Sebastian and Dan make the trip to Viscount Coulthard's estate.

Kimi breathed in the damp morning air as the horse trotted along in front of him. It felt good to get away from the daily routine of normal life. Apart from Kimi's regular trips to the market, he rarely left the estate and sometimes it was too easy to get caught up in its self-contained world, forget that there was a whole other universe outside Lord Rosberg's whims and demands.

Behind Kimi, Dan and Sebastian were uncharacteristically silent. Kimi knew Dan was excited, but this was also a huge step for him and the enormity of leaving the place he'd spent his whole life had to be weighing on him. After a while Sebastian spoke up, addressing Dan with, "How are you feeling?"

"Good," Dan replied. "I mean, I'm nervous, but it's all good. I've just never lived anywhere else."

"You were born at Lord Rosberg's?" 

"Yep, my parents worked there." Dan sighed softly. "They're both buried there."

"I'm sorry," Sebastian said. 

"It's okay." Dan shrugged. "It's just weird."

"I can imagine." Sebastian smiled at him. "So, what's this Jev like?" he asked, and Dan grinned in reply.

"He's the best," he said, and then began a lengthy recitation of all Jev's finest qualities, which included, as Kimi listened, awesome hair, an amazing ass, his adorable laugh, the fact that he was cute when irritated, how easy it was to _make_ him irritated... apparently the list was endless.

They stopped briefly to eat and rest the horse at lunch time, Dan having packed some provisions, but the light was still fading by the time they reached their destination. Viscount Coulthard's castle and estate were much, much smaller than Lord Rosberg's but everything was neatly kept, the thick gravel in the courtyard crunching under the wheels of their cart as they drove in.

The heavy front door opened, and Mark came walking out, waving to them. He was followed by Jev and Viscount Coulthard.

"Hey, mate," Mark said, clapping Kimi on the shoulder as the three of them climbed out of the cart.

The Viscount stepped forward. "You must be Daniel," he said, holding out his hand. "Jev's told me all about you." Dan did an awkward half-bow and grinned nervously, shaking the Viscount's hand. He turned to face Jev, who smiled. Jev glanced sideways at Viscount Coulthard, who gave him a small, encouraging nod, and he stepped closer, hugging Dan in greeting, pulling him in tightly. Dan buried his face in Jev's shoulder for a moment, briefly kissing him as they separated, both of them blushing with the awareness that everyone was watching.

"I've given Jev a few days off, Daniel," the Viscount said. "So you'll have plenty of time to settle in." He looked at Jev. "Why don't you show him up to your room?"

Jev nodded, and took Dan's hand, leading him away. Kimi heard Dan saying, in typical Dan fashion, "We get our own room? Cool." 

"And you're Kimi, yes?" the Viscount said, shaking Kimi's hand.

"Yes, my lord," Kimi said.

"And this is?" Viscount Coulthard looked at Sebastian.

"This is Sebastian, my assistant."

"Pleasure to meet you," said the Viscount, also taking Sebastian's hand and shaking it as if he were an honored guest. The man had to know Sebastian was a slave, but he didn't treat him any differently from Kimi, which was pleasing to see. "I believe dinner should be ready very soon," Viscount Coulthard went on, "so I hope you'll both join us?"

"We'd be happy to," replied Kimi. 

"Excellent." The Viscount clasped his hands together in satisfaction. "If you could show them to their room, Mark?" he said, walking back inside.

"Come on," Mark said. Kimi and Sebastian followed him through the door and down some narrow, stone-lined corridors until they reached a plain but comfortable-looking room. There were no fancy decorations, but the bed was large and wide, much bigger than Kimi's back at Lord Rosberg's, and Kimi felt his cock twitch slightly at the sight, imagining being in here with Sebastian later tonight. "There's some fresh hot water on the wash stand," Mark told them. "So you can get yourselves cleaned up and then come down to the banquet hall. Just turn right out of here, down the stairs at the end and straight on." He closed the door behind him.

Kimi knew they didn't have time to start anything, but he still had to walk over, take Sebastian's face in both his hands and kiss him. They held each other for a while, not speaking, but eventually Kimi stepped back. He poured out some water for them, and they both washed their faces, scrubbing off as much of the dirt from the road as they could.

"The Viscount really does seem like a good man," Sebastian commented hopefully.

"He is," Kimi replied. "You can be sure of that."

When they were done they headed to the dining hall, which was not large, but filled with a friendly atmosphere. It seemed as if everyone ate together, slaves and servants and staff alike all sitting at the long tables, chatting happily. Kimi and Sebastian found a seat next to Mark, both digging in hungrily as plates were laid out before them.

There were several courses, meat and soup and then a sweet dessert, and as people began to finish eating, some of the slaves got up, collecting empty plates from in front of the diners. There was a general air of relaxed informality that made Kimi feel very much at home. Under the table, he rested his hand on Sebastian's thigh, squeezing it a little, and Sebastian shifted closer, leaning sideways against him.

Viscount Coulthard wandered over, sitting down beside Kimi as Mark moved over to make room. He stared over at Dan and Jev, who were at the table opposite talking, their eyes shining as they smiled almost shyly at each other, the affection between them so obvious it was as if it was hanging visible in the air. "I just want to say thank you," the Viscount said. "For helping with bringing Daniel here, the sale and everything involved." He turned to look at Kimi. "I know Toto can be something of a bear when it comes to negotiating."

"With the price you offered it was no problem at all," said Kimi.

"Still, I'm most grateful to you," Viscount Coulthard replied. "If I can ever be of any assistance to you, please don't hesitate."

"Just take care of Dan and Jev."

The Viscount smiled at him. "That, I can do."

Kimi regarded him curiously. "You don't mind?" he asked, gesturing subtly in Dan and Jev's direction. "That they're together?"

"No," the Viscount said, shaking his head, his voice firm. "I'm very, very fond of Jev, and I want him to be happy. And this boy clearly makes him happy." He gazed back over at them. "I know Jev is fond of me also, and that's all I ask from him. But two people who feel as they do about each other should be together, yes?"

"Oh yes," Kimi replied, feeling Sebastian's thigh warm and solid under his hand.

"Would that we all could be lucky enough to have that," Viscount Coulthard mused.

"Indeed, my lord," said Kimi, warmth spreading through his veins with the knowledge of how fortunate he was to have found someone like Sebastian.

After the meal was over, Mark took them down to the kitchen for a drink. There was a jug of wine sitting ready on the rough table as they sat down. "This for us, Fer?" Mark called out, and the bearded man cleaning up the pots and pans waved his approval. Kimi and Mark talked shop for a time, and when Kimi mentioned some of Sebastian's bookkeeping refinements, Mark questioned him eagerly. "How does that work, then?" he asked, and Kimi sat back, let Sebastian explain. His voice was uncertain and halting at first but then he gained confidence as Mark nodded, listening carefully. "That's some clever thinking," he said. "We might start using some of that." 

Kimi couldn't help but feel proud as Sebastian spoke, his arm across Sebastian's back as he watched him talk.

They all chatted a little longer, and eventually the bearded man seemed to have finished his work. He hung up his dishcoth and then plopped himself unceremoniously down into Mark's lap, reaching out taking a sip from Mark's goblet of wine before placing it back on the table, the action so intimate and familiar it made Kimi feel the need to pull Sebastian closer. Mark smiled, draping his arms loosely around the man's waist. "This is Fernando," he said. "And Fer, this is Kimi and Sebastian."

"Hello," Fernando said, nodding in greeting, and Kimi and Sebastian nodded back. He turned to look at Mark. "Time for bed, yes?" he said in a low voice.

"Must be," Mark replied. The two of them stood up. "You can find your way back upstairs, yeah?"

"I'm sure we can manage," Kimi said, and Mark grinned, leading Fernando off. Kimi watched them leave, then bumped Sebastian gently with his shoulder. "Time for bed for us too?" he asked.

"Definitely," Sebastian replied.

As they made their way back up to their room, Kimi found himself wishing they could stay here longer than just tonight. This was a good place, he could tell, a safe place. It made him happy to know that Dan would be living here, but the longing he felt was for himself and Sebastian. He knew that back at Lord Rosberg's they'd never be able to fully relax or be certain that they were secure. Yes, Kimi mostly could handle his lordship, but you could never quite predict what the man might do. It would be heaven to be in a place like this, somewhere you could let you guard down and trust that things would be okay.

But that was life, Kimi knew. Maybe one day, he told himself.

Back in the room, they kissed for a few minutes, taking their time, then undressed each other, piece by piece. Kimi pulled Sebastian's shirt over his head, and Sebastian did the same for him, their actions a mirror image until they were standing before one another naked.

Sebastian walked backwards, dragging Kimi along by the hand until he reached the bed. He laid down on his back, legs spread, guiding Kimi down on top of him. Kimi settled his body over Sebastian's, hissing with pleasure as their cocks lined up together.

Their mouths found each other like they'd never parted, and Kimi thrust slowly up against Sebastian, not in any rush for completion, wanting this to last as long as he could make it.

Sebastian pulled back for a moment, obviously hesitating. Kimi was about to ask what was wrong when he said, seriously, "You know, you can fuck me if you want. I mean… I wouldn't mind."

Kimi stroked Sebastian's face, staring down at him. "But you wouldn't enjoy it, would you?"

"Well, no." Sebastian took hold of Kimi's hand, pulling closer to his mouth and kissing the palm, before he said, "But I know you won't hurt me, so if you want to…"

"I don't want to fuck you."

"You don't?" Sebastian seemed confused. "Why not?"

"Because," Kimi said, smiling at him, "if you're okay with it, I want you to fuck _me_."

" _Oh_." Sebastian shivered, biting his lip. "Are you sure?"

"Yes."

"I don't want to hurt you…" 

"You won't hurt me," Kimi assured him. "I know you won't."

"But you'd tell me, wouldn't you?" Sebastian said, anxiously. "If I hurt you, you'd tell me to stop?"

"Of course I would," replied Kimi. "And I know you'd stop if I asked, I know that." He ran his thumb over Sebastian's lips. "I wouldn't ask you to if I didn't know that."

"Okay, then." Sebastian nodded.

"I don't want you to do anything you're not comfortable with."

"No, I want to," said Sebastian. "I just… I want it to be good for you."

Kimi reached down, caressing Sebastian's cock. "Oh," he said, "I know you'll make it good."

Sebastian grinned at him, and Kimi rolled over on to his back. He'd noticed when they'd come back from dinner that someone had placed a stoppered vial of oil on the small table beside the bed, as well as a cloth and a bowl of water. Viscount Coulthard obviously knew how to take care of his guests, so Kimi grabbed the vial.

He bent his knees, feet on the bed, and Sebastian sat up, kneeling between his legs. He held out his hand and Kimi poured some of the oil on to it, placing the vial aside. "Okay," Sebastian said. Kimi heard him take a deep breath, and then there was a finger at his entrance, pushing in slowly, working in and out. 

Kimi took hold of his cock, jacking it unhurriedly, enjoying the sensations as Sebastian added another finger. He could feel himself relaxing into it, opening up ready. It had been so long since anyone fucked him. Years, he thought, but this was going to be worth the wait, he was sure.

Sebastian curled his fingers up inside Kimi, hitting that spot, and Kimi's hips jerked up. "More," he demanded, and Sebastian used another finger, gaining confidence.

"Are you ready?" he asked, his voice strained with lust, and Kimi nodded.

Sebastian laid forward over Kimi, supporting his weight on one forearm as he used the other to slowly guide his cock into Kimi. Kimi had to close his eyes at the feel of it, filling him up gradually until Sebastian was fully inside him. He didn't move, waiting as Kimi breathed in and out. "Oh god, Seb," Kimi said, feeling as if he was going to completely lose it at any second. "Please fuck me," he said, desperately. "Please, I need to you to fuck me."

Sebastian slowly began to thrust in and out of him, and Kimi moaned, letting go like he never had before. "Harder," he said, pulling Sebastian in for a kiss, barely able to focus enough to find his mouth, licking at the corner of his lips, holding on as Sebastian fucked into him faster and faster. His hand slid down between them, pulling on Kimi's cock, and they went higher in perfect unison, both panting out their pleasure in short, fierce breaths timed to the rhythm of Sebastian's fuck.

They came at the same time, Kimi losing it at the feel of Sebastian's come spurting out hot inside him, feeling as if he'd never stop. Sebastian collapsed on top of him, their sweat mingling as their heated bodies stayed joined, never wanting to part.

"Thank you," Kimi whispered. "For everything."

"You're welcome," Sebastian murmured. He paused for a second, and then said quietly, "I love you."

Kimi sighed contentedly. He knew that his fate was sealed, his life tied to Sebastian's now, whatever happened. And come what may, he couldn't be happier about that. "I love you too," he said.

===

The next morning, they were up early, ready to leave. Mark was waiting with a parcel of food for the road, prepared by Fernando, and Dan and Jev also came out to see them off, the two of them quite the sight. They were barely dressed, both with blissed out expressions on their faces, Jev's hair sticking up at odd angles and Dan's neck covered in what looked like bite marks. "Thanks, Iceman," he said, hugging Kimi and then Sebastian. "Look after him, won't you?" he added, and he wasn't talking to Kimi.

"I will," Sebastian said, smiling. 

They climbed into the cart, this time Sebastian sitting next to Kimi, squeezed together in the driver's seat. Kimi clicked his tongue at the horse, who trotted off. He looked back, feeling a lump in his throat as Dan disappeared back into the castle. It wasn't easy to leave him behind, but Kimi knew it was for the best and besides, it wasn't as if either of them was alone any more.

After a few hours' travel, Kimi pulled up the horse. There was a grassy clearing by the side of the road, bordered by a stream lined with willow trees. He loosened the horse's harness, allowing the animal to graze and rest.

Sebastian unwrapped the food Fernando had provided them and they ate, then lay in the shade under the trees for a while, the long grass hiding them from the road. Kimi felt the faint breeze on his face, the weight of Sebastian's head resting on his chest. The only sounds were the trickling of the water and the gentle noise of the horse cropping at the grass. Kimi ran his fingertips up and down Sebastian's spine, lightly at first, but then with more boldness.

Sebastian turned on to his back, unlacing his breeches with a dirty smile, and Kimi moved downwards, taking him in his mouth, sucking gently until he came. After, Sebastian jerked him off and they lay there a time longer, not wanting to break the spell they seemed to have fallen under. But real life called and they gathered themselves up, once more embarking on the journey home, back on the road.

"I was thinking," Kimi said after a long silence. "You remember the other night, I was talking about my parents' old place?"

"I remember."

"And you said maybe it could be okay for two people?" Kimi swallowed, staring ahead, unsure he should be asking this question so soon. But he had to know. "Did you mean that?"

"Absolutely," Sebastian said, not even a hint of uncertainty in his voice.

"Well, I have some money saved," said Kimi. "It's not enough to buy you now, but if I keep saving then in a year or two, it might be." He looked at Sebastian. "We could leave, go away together. Would you want that?"

Sebastian looked back at him, eyes overflowing with happiness. "More than anything," he replied.

"Okay then." Kimi draped his arm around Sebastian's shoulders, pulling him closer. They barely spoke for the rest of the trip, but there were no words needed to express what they felt. It was solid and unbreakable, and Kimi couldn't believe he'd ever doubted the strength of it.

He let the horse amble along, in no hurry to get back, so it was almost dark by the time they arrived. Heikki was waiting in the courtyard, a serious, worried expression on his face. _Shit_ , Kimi thought, knowing that it couldn't mean anything good. Heikki was generally as stoic as they came, so for him to be so visibly concerned was a very bad sign. "What's happened?" Kimi asked immediately, his mind racing with potential disasters.

Heikki looked at him. "We just got word from his lordship," he said. "There'll be a guest arriving first thing in the morning." 

"Who?" Kimi said, because there was only one person who would elicit this reaction in Heikki, and surely, _surely_ it couldn't be him.

"He's coming back," Heikki said, his voice grim. "It's Lord Hamilton."


	15. Chapter 15

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kimi tries to prevent Lord Hamilton's visit, and we find out some more about his past. There's a bit of bad stuff in this one, but nothing extreme as yet. And sorry for another slow update, but all the really bad stuff happens next so I'm going to get through that fast as I can!!

Kimi turned to Sebastian. "I'll meet you upstairs," he said. Sebastian nodded, obviously realizing that something serious was going on, and walked away. Kimi watched him leave, standing there as he glanced backwards, wishing more than anything he could just go with him, lock the door of their room and let Sebastian fuck him till he couldn't think. But instead he had to deal with this mess.

"Does Toto know?" he asked Heikki.

"Yes," Heikki said, "but you know what he's like, he won't say anything."

"No, of course he won't," Kimi mused, thinking to himself. There had to be a way to stop this. "I'll try speaking to him, see if he can do something." He looked at Heikki. "Do the slaves know who's coming tomorrow?"

Heikki nodded. "You know what it's like, can't keep anything secret in this place."

"Are they all right?"

"They're pretty restless," conceded Heikki. "There's quite a few of them who were here last time Lord Hamilton visited, and they've told the others some of what happened." 

"Okay, talk to them, tell them I'm doing everything I can."

"I'll do my best," Heikki said, heading off. Kimi went straight to Toto's work room and knocked on the door.

"Come in," the man called, and Kimi entered.

"Yes?" Toto said, though there was no way he didn't guess why Kimi was here.

"Is it true?" Kimi asked. "Lord Hamilton's really coming back?"

Toto looked up at him, leaned back in his chair. "I'm afraid so."

"We can't let this happen," said Kimi. "You know what he was like last time."

"There isn't anything we can do," Toto replied, sounding so _resigned_ Kimi almost wanted to hit him. 

But he steadied himself, saying, "I thought they'd fallen out."

"So did I, but apparently Lord Hamilton's been writing to him, and somehow he's managed to ingratiate himself back into our master's graces."

"Can't you talk to him?"

Toto shrugged. "What would I say?"

"That he needs to stop this."

"It's not our place to question his lordship's decisions." 

"You're the only person he might listen to," Kimi pleaded.

"His lordship's will is his lordship's will," Toto said calmly. 

"That's a load of shit," Kimi snapped. "You know it is."

Toto wasn't taking the bait. "I swore on oath to his father to always protect his son and to protect this household," he replied. "I won't ever go back on that."

Kimi shook his head impatiently. "Lord Rosberg isn't his father, and he doesn't deserve your loyalty." 

Toto didn't speak for a second, looking back at Kimi with a careful, studied expression on his face. "And what about _your_ loyalty to him, Kimi? Precisely what did his lordship ever do to deserve that?"

Kimi glared back at the man. "Don't drag up the past."

Toto held Kimi's gaze, but then looked away. His voice was more gentle when he next spoke, saying, "You know what the two of them are like, it won't be a week before they've had enough of a spat that Hamilton will be gone."

"A lot can happen in a week."

"Yes, it can," Toto agreed, "but we'll get through it."

There was no point in trying to convince him any further, Kimi could see. "I hope you're right," he said, turning on his heel and leaving the room without waiting for a reply.

He paused in the hall outside, thinking. If Toto wasn't prepared to act, then Kimi needed to take matter into his own hands, so he marched upstairs directly to Lord Rosberg's chambers. 

He nodded at the guard posted at the door, then knocked quietly, not waiting before he entered the room. It was dimly lit, only a few candles burning. Some of the slaves were lying asleep on the bed but there was no sign of Lord Rosberg. Kimi saw a light coming from behind the door that led to his lordship's separate dressing room, and he headed over, not bothering to knock this time.

His lordship was standing at a table in the center of the room, casually and unashamedly naked as he looked through a pile of furs and silks. Kimi guessed he was deciding what he would wear tomorrow to greet Lord Hamilton. It was strange, the hold that man had over his lordship. Lord Rosberg liked to impress all his friends, but there was something more to his relationship with Lord Hamilton. They'd been childhood friends, and gotten into their fair share of mostly harmless trouble together, but as adults, they seemed to be a bad mix. His lordship was always oddly compliant around Lord Hamilton, never arguing with him or contradicting him, somehow always led along as a mostly passive participant in whatever debasement Lord Hamilton chose to inflict on others.

Lord Rosberg looked back over his shoulder at Kimi. "What?" he said.

Kimi decided not to tiptoe around the issue. "You're really going to let Lord Hamilton back into this house, my lord?"

His lordship faced Kimi, his arms folded defensively. "I believe that who I choose to associate with is none of your business, yes?

"I bit my tongue the last time he was here, but I won't stay silent this time if he begins to abuse the slaves again."

"Really?" Lord Rosberg asked, the word dripping with sarcasm. "I thought staying silent was what you did best. After all, that's the only reason I still put up with you."

Kimi ignored the slight and went on. "You can't let him treat the slaves the way he did during his last visit, my lord, you can't allow that to happen again."

"The slaves are my property, I'll allow my friends to treat them however I wish."

"Yes," Kimi agreed. "They _are_ your property. But would you allow your friends to treat the rest of your property in this way? Your horses, perhaps? Or the castle? Would you allow them to be damaged the way Lord Hamilton seems to enjoy damaging the slaves?"

Lord Rosberg laughed bitterly. "You always have an answer, don't you? Always so noble, so concerned for others."

"Yes, I am concerned," Kimi said. "And not just for the slaves, but for you, my lord." He took one step closer, but that was all he dared for now. "I don't like what Lord Hamilton does to you, the effect he has on you."

Lord Rosberg gave Kimi a furious look, his voice like ice as he said, "Why don't you take your self-righteousness and fuck off back downstairs then, like a good boy." He turned his back on Kimi, picking up and examining one of his more luxurious fur coats.

Kimi took a deep breath. There was nothing for it, he knew. This was his last resort, the only appeal he had left.

He moved nearer then rested his hand gently on the nape of Lord Rosberg's neck, fingers squeezing softly into a caress. His lordship's body was stiff, spine straight and muscles tense, but he leaned almost imperceptibly back into the touch. "Nico," Kimi said. It had been so many years since he'd spoken the name that it felt foreign and strange in his mouth, the shape his lips made around it unfamiliar, but he went on. "Nico, you are what you are, I know that, I've accepted it, but you're not _this_. I know you, and this isn't you, I have to believe that."

Lord Rosberg spun around, his face almost contorted with haughty rage. "Don't you _ever_ dare to address me like that again, you lost that privilege a long, long time ago," he spat out. He sneered at Kimi. "And you don't fucking know me, you never did."

"Maybe not," Kimi said. He stepped away, but his lordship followed, moving in closer, inserting himself into Kimi's personal space, not hesitating as he cupped Kimi's groin through his breeches, rubbing roughly, staring into Kimi's eyes with a challenging look. Kimi didn't back off, calling the bluff, but his lordship wasn't going to give in either.

"When was the last time I fucked you, Kimi?" he asked, never wavering in his gaze as his hand stroked up and down Kimi's length. "Must be nearly ten years now?"

"Almost," Kimi replied, not looking away. He couldn't help himself from inhaling sharply as he started to harden under the touch, and Lord Rosberg smiled triumphantly at the sound.

"We were so young and foolish, weren't we?" he went on, the bitter, disdainful tone in his voice making Kimi's heart race with tension. "We thought we were in love." His lordship shifted even nearer, his lips against Kimi's ear as he whispered, "I'm a much, _much_ better fuck now." He bit down on Kimi's ear lobe, hard enough to draw blood, making Kimi gasp in pain. "Much better than that mousey little blonde thing you're so protective of, I'm guessing."

Kimi's blood boiled, but he wasn't stupid enough to react.

"I bet he's got a big cock though, hasn't he? The quiet ones always have." He grabbed Kimi's shoulders, roughly shoving him around so he faced the table, pushing his hips flush up against the edge. Kimi didn't fight him. He could, of course, being bigger and far stronger than his lordship, but resisting wouldn't serve any purpose in this situation. "What a shame," Lord Rosberg continued, "that he probably doesn't even know what to do with it." Kimi could hear him touching himself, the slick sound of precome sliding under his hand. "I remember it always took a lot to satisfy you, didn't it?" 

Kimi braced his arms on the table, waiting for the inevitable. His lordship's hand lingered at the top of Kimi's breeches, but instead of unfastening them, it trailed down, squeezing at the muscles of his ass. He felt his lordship's cock press in close, grinding up against him. He listened as Lord Rosberg moaned, gripping Kimi's hips as he rubbed himself off until he came. A warm, wet patch soaked into Kimi's breeches, and his lordship released him. 

"You can leave now," Lord Rosberg said. The sneer was for once absent from his voice, something almost pained lingering in its place. 

There was nothing else Kimi could say, except, "Please just think about it." 

"I do my best to never think about you, Kimi," his lordship replied distantly. "I find it easier that way."

"I'm sorry, my lord." Kimi walked out. He barely even understood what had just happened but he hoped he'd somehow managed to get through to Lord Rosberg.

He went directly down to the store rooms, picking out some fresh clothes. He stuffed the come-stained breeches into a basket placed there for dirty linen, pushing them down under some sheets, feeling vaguely guilty, though he knew he'd done nothing wrong. He just didn't want to have to explain things to Sebastian, not now. Not yet, at least.

He found some water and a cloth and quickly washed the drying blood off his ear where Lord Rosberg had bitten him, and then went upstairs. 

When he opened the door of their room, he found Sebastian pacing up and down anxiously. He stopped as soon as he saw Kimi. "You changed your clothes," he said, vaguely puzzled.

"Yeah." Kimi looked down at himself. "I went to see Lord Rosberg, I didn't want to go in my dirty clothes from the trip home."

"Oh," said Sebastian. "But what's going on?" he asked worriedly. "Who's Lord Hamilton?"

Kimi couldn't bring himself to answer, pulling Sebastian tightly into his arms and simply holding him, breathing in the scent of his hair and skin until he began to feel calmer. Sebastian seemed to understand, wrapping his arms around Kimi and pressing his body up against him, waiting until Kimi was ready to talk.

At last he felt strong enough to speak, and he loosened their embrace. Sebastian looked up at him inquiringly, and Kimi said, "Lord Hamilton's a nasty piece of work, the way he treats the slaves." Kimi shook his head. "It was bad the last time he was here, _really_ bad. I know Lord Rosberg can be a bit of a shit, but Hamilton's just…" Kimi didn't even know how to explain it. He couldn't understand the _delight_ Lord Hamilton took in hurting the slaves, it was something so alien to him. "He's not good." He looked at Sebastian. "Maybe you should stay up here for a few days, keep out of the way." Kimi couldn't bear the thought of Sebastian coming into contact with Lord Hamilton in even the most casual way.

Sebastian frowned at him."You can't just lock me up here like I'm a princess in a tower."

Kimi couldn't help smiling at the image, but he was serious when he said, "You might not be safe from him."

"No, I might not," Sebastian pointed out, "but you can't protect me from everything."

"But I want to," Kimi replied.

Sebastian smiled gently at him. "But you can't."

"I know."

They both undressed quietly and got into bed, Sebastian fitting himself perfectly into Kimi's arms like it was where he belonged. They kissed, mouths opening up against one another, their tongues tangling in a slow dance of familiarity. Sebastian kissed his way along Kimi's jawline, licking his neck before he stopped.

"What happened to your ear?" he asked.

"Oh," Kimi said, shrugging. "When we were lying in the grass at lunch time, I think something bit me. An insect or something."

Sebastian looked at him thoughtfully, but didn't say anything. He settled his head back down on Kimi's chest, sighing with contentment.

"Do you mind if we don't…" Kimi said, his hand running up and down Sebastian's back. "I'm just really tired."

"Of course not," Sebastian said. "This is good, this is always enough."

"Yeah," Kimi replied, trying not to think about what tomorrow would bring. "More than enough."


	16. Chapter 16

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lord Hamilton arrives. Not a happy chapter, but the bad stuff is not as yet explicit.

Kimi woke up early the next morning, managing to carefully extricate himself from Sebastian's embrace without disturbing him. He dressed quickly and quietly, making to leave but he was drawn back to the bed. He stood there at the foot for a minute, drinking in the sight of Sebastian like it was an elixir, soothing the tension that knotted inside him. Sebastian was always beautiful, but he was particularly beautiful like this, his features relaxed in sleep. Closed eyes were framed by long eyelashes, and his red lips were slightly parted as he breathed in and out. Kimi watched his chest rise and fall, his own breathing deepening in rhythm. He only wanted for the two of them to never have to leave this room, staying here safe forever, but that wasn't the way of the world, he knew.

There was a heavy, leaden feeling in his chest as he made his way downstairs, almost an impending sense of doom that he couldn't shake off. He realized it didn't help anyone to expect the worst, but previous experience had taught him that when it came to Lord Hamilton, the worst truly was the worst. 

Lord Rosberg and some of the other staff were waiting at the front entrance to the castle, ready to greet Lord Hamilton. His lordship gave Kimi a brief glance as he lined up with the others, but looked away quickly, not acknowledging him. It wasn't long before Lord Hamilton's carriage pulled into the courtyard, drawn by four showily groomed black horses. The carriage itself was polished to a high, refined-looking sheen and even after the long journey, it still gleamed in the early morning light.

Lord Hamilton emerged from inside, wrapped in ostentatiously exotic furs, a strangely shaped hat perched on his head. Kimi had forgotten Lord Hamilton's rather unique fashion sense. The man had never met a fad he didn't like. "Nico," he said warmly, embracing Lord Rosberg tightly. "How I've missed you."

His lordship hugged him back. "And I you," he said. "It's been far too long, Lewis."

The rest of Lord Hamilton's entourage emerged from the carriage. There were six others in total, two people Kimi recognized from last time, hangers-on in the disguise of friends, two men dressed in the bizarrely-designed uniform of Lord Hamilton's personal bodyguard, and two exhausted-looking slaves. 

Lord Rosberg linked his arm through Lord Hamilton's, saying, "Come on, come upstairs for some breakfast." He began to lead Lord Hamilton off, waving back at Kimi. "Send us up some entertainment, will you?" he said dismissively.

Lord Hamilton looked over, his upper lip curling with unconcealed disgust as his eyes met Kimi's. "Kimi, how delightful," he said sarcastically. "I'm so glad to see you're still working here. What a joy you always are."

"My lord," Kimi replied curtly, nodding.

"We'll be needing your best boys, so make sure they're up to the task, won't you?"

"Of course." Kimi watched them walk away, then stamped off down the side of the castle to the servant's entrance.

===

For the first few days, things didn't seem so bad. The slaves were being used hard, _very_ hard, but there seemed to be no serious damage beyond a few bruises and cuts. Kimi wanted to hope that this time Lord Rosberg was managing to control his friend, but then on the third morning of Lord Hamilton's stay, Mitch came limping back downstairs with some of the other slaves.

"What happened?" Kimi asked immediately.

"It's nothing," Mitch answered, biting his lip in pain as he stood on one leg, the other held up gingerly.

"What _happened?"_ said Kimi.

"They just had me tied up at a weird angle, and Lord Hamilton tried to turn me over with releasing me." Mitch shook his head. "I thought he was going to pull my hip out."

"But he didn't?"

"Only just," Mitch said. "I don't think he even cared."

"You said something? He didn't listen?"

"They had a gag on me." The kid was putting a brave face on, acting casual, but Kimi could see that his hands were trembling slightly and he was paler than usual. Kimi walked around him, checking for further injuries. There were several large welts on his back, deep enough that they were oozing blood. Kimi gritted his teeth, trying to remain calm. "What did he use on you here?"

"It's like a big cat o'nine tails with blades on the ends," Mitch replied. "Lord Rosberg stopped him before he did too much with it." 

"He stopped when Lord Rosberg asked?"

"Well, eventually." Mitch shrugged. "They kind of had an argument about it. It got pretty heated."

"Okay," said Kimi, nodding slowly. "Go in the infirmary, I'll need to clean that up."

Mitch nodded obediently, limping off. 

Kimi stood for a second, thinking, considering his options, but then suddenly he heard the sound of laughter in the hall outside. There were loud footsteps, and Lord Hamilton's voice booming out, echoing on the walls as it drew closer.

Kimi stared over at Sebastian, panicking. "Go in the infirmary with Mitch," he said. Sebastian nodded, standing up, but he'd only taken a few steps across the room when Lord Hamilton walked in.

"Hello, Kimi," he said. Lord Rosberg and a few of Lord Hamilton's entourage, including his bodyguards, trailed in after him. 

Kimi saw Sebastian shrink back instinctively, his shoulders hunching, as if he was trying to disappear. Kimi stepped forward into the center of the room. "What can we help you with today, my lord?"

"We want some fresh boys, of course," Lord Hamilton replied. "They tire too easily, we need more." He gave Kimi a withering look. "I don't see how you can be doing your job properly if we don't have enough boys to keep us satisfied."

"I'm sorry, my lord, but if you'd given us advance warning of your visit, I'm sure we could have had extra slaves on hand ready for you."

"What a shame, then," Lord Hamilton said. Heikki was already at the door of the dormitory, bringing in some of the more rested slaves. There was Marcus, Kevin, Carlos, Max and several others, Max giving Kimi his customary resentful smirk. Lord Hamilton looked them up and down. "They'll do, I suppose," he said. "What do you think, Nico?"

Lord Rosberg shrugged, unsmiling. He always seemed _smaller_ when he was around Lord Hamilton, that cloud of ego and self-importance that usually surrounded him somehow deflated. "Whatever," he said.

"Aw, princess," said Lord Hamilton, his voice sickly sweet with put-on concern."I just want to make you happy." 

"I'm happy," replied Lord Rosberg, sullenly, appearing as far from happy as it was possible to be.

But that wasn't any of Kimi's business. He held his breath, hoping that now that Lord Hamilton had made a sufficient show of himself, displayed his dominance in the most petty way possible, that they would all leave.

But then it happened. Lord Hamilton glanced over at Sebastian and said, "What about him?" Kimi suddenly felt as if he was falling, the earth opening up beneath his feet. His lungs were empty of air, and when he tried to speak the words died on lips, frozen and helpless.

"He's a household slave," Heikki said firmly, and Kimi shot him a quick, grateful nod.

"So what?" said Lord Hamilton. "If he's a slave, he's a slave. Come here, darling, and let me have a look at that sweet mouth of yours." He beckoned to Sebastian, who remained rooted to the spot, visibly terrified. Lord Hamilton nodded impatiently at his bodyguards, who took hold of Sebastian's arms, dragging him stumbling towards Lord Hamilton, presenting him in front of the man.

"Oh yes," he said, running his thumb over Sebastian's lips. "Won't these look pretty wrapped around my cock." He smiled greedily. "Let's get you upstairs and on your knees."

Kimi looked desperately over at Lord Rosberg, who met his eyes for a second, a blank expression on his face before he turned away. "My lord," Kimi said. _"Please_." He went to take a step forward, but felt Heikki grab his arm with a warning grip, holding him still.

"Is there a problem here, Nico?" Lord Hamilton said, looking over at Lord Rosberg.

"No," his lordship replied, staring down at the ground. "No problem at all." He lifted his eyes, meeting Kimi's gaze defiantly. "Take him," he said.

Lord Hamilton's bodyguards were either side of Sebastian, gripping his arms roughly, pulling him out the door. Kimi thought he would perhaps struggle with them, but there seemed no fight left in him, as if he had long ago resigned himself to this fate. Kimi gave him an anguished look, but Sebastian didn't even appear to see him, his eyes empty of life, hollow and vacant-looking.

Kimi strained in Heikki's grasp, but it was useless, he knew. There was literally nothing he could do that wouldn't make things worse for Sebastian. Nothing. 

"Is he your special friend then, Kimi?" Lord Hamilton asked, noting Kimi's distress with unabashed glee.

"No," Kimi replied, trying as hard as he could to sound neutral and uncaring, but he knew his tone betrayed him. "He's just a slave."

"Just a slave," mused Lord Hamilton. "Well, in any case, I promise I'll take extra good care of him for you." He gestured at the slaves Heikki had brought in, and they obediently filed out, followed by Lord Hamilton and his companions. Lord Rosberg left the room last, glancing back over his shoulder. Kimi was expecting a victorious smile of satisfaction, but instead there was only a petulant, bitter sadness.

He _knew_ , Kimi suddenly understood. Nico knew _exactly_ what he was doing, and how bad it was. He just didn't care. 

Perhaps he'd _never_ cared.

As soon as they were gone Kimi freed himself from Heikki's hold. "Fuck," he said. _"Fuck_. I should have stopped them."

"You can't stop them, you know you can't," Heikki stated. "If you give Lord Hamilton even the slightest opportunity to get you fired, he'll take it."

"I have to do something."

"And what do you think will happen to Sebastian if you're not here? 

Kimi slumped down in his chair, resting his head in his hands, despair washing over him. Heikki was right, of course. 

"If you tell me this was always going to happen and what did I expect, getting involved with a slave, then I swear I will fucking hit you," Kimi snapped at him.

"No," Hekki replied quietly. "I wasn't going to say that." He sat down across from Kimi, looking at him. "Up until Mitch just now, Lord Hamilton hasn't been that bad, has he?"

"Bad enough."

"But not as bad as last time, no?"

"No."

"So maybe it will be okay?" Heikki barely even sounded hopeful. He was only trying to make Kimi feel better, and it wasn't as if Kimi didn't appreciate the effort, but it was no comfort.

"You know it won't be okay."

"I know," Heikki said. "But look, Sebastian's been through worse, hasn't he?"

"I don't know," replied Kimi. "Maybe."

"I saw him when he got here," said Heikki. "I'm pretty sure he's been through worse. And he survived, didn't he? So he'll survive this."

"He shouldn't _have_ to survive it." Kimi heard the waver in his own voice, cursing himself for showing how badly this was affecting him.

"No, he shouldn't." Heikki frowned. "But he will, and this time he'll have you to help him through it, yeah?"

"I suppose." Kimi looked up, and saw Mitch waiting hesitantly at the door of the infirmary.

"Should I go?" he asked quietly.

"No," Kimi said, standing up wearily. "Come on, I'll fix up your back."

===

Hours passed, though they felt like days. Kimi tried to work, hoping it would stop his mind from wandering, but he couldn't concentrate, his thoughts always returning to Sebastian and what he must be enduring right now. Images crowded into Kimi's brain, pictures of Sebastian with Lord Hamilton, every possible abuse and violation burning itself into his imagination until he wanted to scream in frustration at his own powerlessness.

In the end, he simply sat, leaning back in his chair and staring into space, willing his mind blank, praying for nothingness.

It was late afternoon when Heikki said, "How about I go up and see if can get a feel for what's going on?"

Kimi nodded silently, not trusting himself to speak.

"Okay," Heikki replied.

After he was gone, Kimi got up, pacing up and down the room, counting his steps till he thought he might go crazy. He checked on Mitch, who was resting on his bed in the dormitory, and then went back to pacing, circling the room until his head was spinning.

It must have been at least half an hour before Heikki walked back through the door.

"What's going on?" Kimi asked immediately.

Heikki didn't reply, running one hand through his hair. He seemed strangely agitated, his normally composed and impassive face strained with distress, his eyes nervous as he looked away, unable to meet Kimi's gaze. His cheeks were flushed, his shirt untucked, breeches messily and obviously hastily laced.

"What happened? Is it Sebastian?" Kimi said, louder now, panic creeping up inside him. He had no idea what this was, but it was bad, he knew.

"It's nothing," Heikki replied. "But they want you upstairs."

"What?" said Kimi. "Why?"

Heikki evaded the question, only saying, "Lord Hamilton's asking for you by name."

"Heikki…" Kimi said. "Tell me."

"Just…" Heikki looked at him helplessly. "Just go upstairs." He went into the infirmary and slammed the door behind him.


	17. Chapter 17

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kimi goes upstairs. So I knew this bit was always going to be bad but it somehow ended up _really_ bad. Sorry, and I understand if anyone wants to skip this one. :(
> 
> **There is graphic non-con in this chapter.**

It was clear Heikki wasn't going to talk about what had happened, and that the only way Kimi could find out exactly what was going on was to go and see for himself. A frozen trepidation filled him, cold and relentless, but not for a second did he consider not facing whatever was awaiting him in Lord Rosberg's chambers. Whatever Sebastian was suffering, the one thing Kimi could do for him was to not let him be suffering it alone.

He took the stairs two at a time, his heart in his mouth as he approached the entrance to the chambers. The guards posted there nodded at him, and Kimi knocked quickly, pushing the door open without waiting for an answer. 

The atmosphere hit him as soon as he walked inside, the air stale and stuffy, thick with the smell of sweat, alcohol and come. His lordship's chambers were often somewhat rank when he had guests, but this was far worse than normal. And there was an unfamiliar scent in the mix... something with a distinct, unpleasant edge that made Kimi's stomach turn. It was _fear_ , he realized. There was a tension in the air that was unmistakably dangerous.

Kimi looked around the room, desperately trying to spot Sebastian. Lord Hamilton's two friends were on the bed with a few of the slaves, one of them fucking someone with some vigor while the other held him down. The bodyguards were both leaning back against the table, breeches open, kissing each other openly as Max and Kevin knelt in front of them, sucking their cocks. Lord Rosberg stood wearing only a shirt, watching with an absent expression on his face, stroking himself with one hand, a goblet of wine in the other.

In the middle of the room was a slave tied to one of Lord Rosberg's specially made benches. He was bent over with his ass in the air, legs spread wide with each ankle restrained tightly to prevent him from moving.

Though the slave's face wasn't visible, Kimi didn't have to look twice to know it was Sebastian. 

Drying come was flaked on his buttocks and the backs of his thighs, and there were red welts striped over his skin. For one horrifying second, Kimi recalled what Mitch had said about Lord Hamilton's cat o'nine tails, but this was clearly the result of a milder cropping, the skin seeming unbroken. Fresh come was dripping out of his ass, slowly sliding down over his thighs. It was white, Kimi could see, so at least that meant there couldn't be any significant bleeding. It was small comfort, but it was something.

Kimi tried to sidle closer unobtrusively and see Sebastian's face, but it was too late, as someone grabbed his arm roughly. "Kimi," said Lord Hamilton. The man was naked, his skin smooth and unmarked, cock hard and jutting out in front of him. "So nice to have your company." He gestured at Sebastian. "And you can see your friend's enjoying himself." Lord Hamilton smiled, lowering his voice. "I had the pleasure of being the first to fuck him, and he was nice and tight for me."

Kimi took a sharp breath, but didn't reply, fearful of what he might say if he spoke. He couldn't further endanger Sebastian by making the situation any more volatile than it already was. 

"The thing is, I was thinking," Lord Hamilton said, walking to stand behind Kimi, reaching around to slowly rub at his crotch. Kimi stood as still as he could as Lord Hamilton touched him, his cock not responding, his body tense with the effort to restrain himself from physically hurting this man. "And what I was thinking," Lord Hamilton continued, "was that it was such a shame not to share with you, Kimi." His cock was now pressed hard against Kimi as he continued to stroke him. "You work so tirelessly and seem to have so little pleasure in your life, and I thought I'd like to reward you by letting you fuck this pretty ass."

"I'd prefer not to do that, my lord," Kimi said evenly.

"Oh," Lord Hamilton replied, immediately, the words like poison in Kimi's ear, "I'm sorry, did I phrase that as if you had the right to refuse me? Because, last time I checked, you don't." He laughed cruelly. "Your big blonde friend from downstairs certainly seemed to enjoy himself with him. It took him a _long_ time to come, I think he wanted to make it last." 

Kimi tried not to think about that image, knowing what it would have cost Heikki to do such a thing. He looked over at Lord Rosberg, who was standing staring at them, drinking deeply from the goblet in his hand. He was swaying a little, clearly drunk, and seemed ill-at-ease, almost disturbed. Whatever was going on, his lordship wasn't enjoying himself, but Kimi knew now for certain that he wouldn't do anything to stop Lord Hamilton.

But he still asked. "My lord?" he said, the last hope he had of not having to do this fading away.

Lord Rosberg looked back at him. His jaw was clenched tight, his eyes unfocused. "Do as Lewis says," he said, and then turned away, wandering off up the other end of the room.

"Hear that, Kimi?" said Lord Hamilton. "You're to do as I say." He grinned like a predator going in for the kill. "You're not going to disobey a direct order from your master, are you? Because I'm fairly certain that would mean instant dismissal. We'd have to send you packing right now, wouldn't we?"

Kimi thought, remembering what Heikki had said earlier about Lord Hamilton being prepared to seize any opportunity to oust Kimi from his job. Lord Hamilton had always hated him, Kimi knew that, and though the man took a huge and obvious pleasure from cruelties like this, his ultimate goal in this current charade was probably to be rid of Kimi. Though Kimi had only a small amount of influence over Lord Rosberg, even that was too much for Lord Hamilton. He was a vain, insecure man who couldn't bear to not be in control at all times, and he accomplished that by associating with men weaker than himself, men like Lord Rosberg.

And right now, Kimi couldn't be the weaker man. He had to be strong, make the worst decision possible and do what was necessary. Lord Hamilton was correct in that if Kimi was fired, he'd be escorted from the estate immediately. There would be no grace period or notice, that wasn't how things worked. And then Sebastian would be left here, alone, completely at the mercy of Lord Hamilton. 

Kimi couldn't let that happen.

"As you wish then, my lord," he said, stepping forward, standing behind Sebastian. He tried rationalize it to himself. How many times had Sebastian been taken already in the hours he'd spent in this room? What would be once more in the grand scheme of what had been done to him? Nothing much, surely, Kimi told himself, knowing it wasn't true. But he would do what had to be done.

He unlaced his breeches, lowering them enough to take out his flaccid cock, spitting into his hand before stroking himself. He closed his eyes, willing himself to get enough of an erection to get this over with. He pictured the times he'd been with Sebastian but that only made him even softer. Even the _thought_ of what they'd previously shared didn't belong here, couldn't be sullied by what was going to occur. Instead, Kimi concentrated purely on the physical sensations, finally getting sufficiently hard. There was a bitter taste in his mouth as he moved closer to Sebastian, lining himself up behind him.

He laid his hand softly on Sebastian's back, hoping to perhaps reassure him somewhat, let him know that this, at least, would be as swift and as painless as Kimi could possibly make it. Sebastian's head lifted for a moment at the touch and he glanced back over his shoulder. His eyes were red, his mouth swollen and used-looking, and tears stained his cheeks. Kimi wasn't sure Sebastian would even recognize him, recalling the expressionless way Sebastian had looked at him when he'd been dragged out of the work room. But here, the impenetrable mask that had settled on his features disappeared for a split second, recognition sparking deep within the blue of his eyes. He nodded briefly at Kimi, forgiveness and understanding communicated without a single word. Kimi only wanted to say _I'm sorry_ , his heart breaking like he'd never known it could, but before he was able to even open his mouth, Sebastian's head had slumped back down, his body again limp and yielding.

"Come on," Lord Hamilton said impatiently. "Get on with it."

Kimi took a deep breath, holding his cock and guiding it slowly into Sebastian. More come leaked out of him as Kimi pushed in, stopping when he was fully sheathed within him. Kimi tried not to think about what he was doing, attempting to follow Sebastian's lead and dissociate from the situation as best he could, but it seemed there was no escape, the full horror of what he was doing settling over him like a weight. He would carry the knowledge of this forever, he knew.

Lord Hamilton was right behind him, and slapped him hard on the ass. _"Move,"_ he hissed out viciously. Kimi obeyed, thrusting his cock in and out of Sebastian as gently as he could manage. "Harder," Lord Hamilton commanded, and Kimi tried to give the appearance of putting more energy into it without actually doing so. 

Lord Hamilton pressed up behind him. "Are you going to come?" he asked, biting the back of Kimi's neck and then looking over his shoulder, watching. "I won't let you stop until I know you've come." 

Kimi kept moving as he felt slick fingers push into his ass, carelessly harsh, working inside. He closed his eyes, trying not to think as Lord Hamilton's cock entered him, focusing on trying to relax. It wasn't so bad, he told himself, as Lord Hamilton fucked into him with a fixated intensity, one arm wrapped around Kimi's chest, the other gripping his hips hard enough to bruise. Every thrust pushed Kimi's cock further into Sebastian, and he concentrated on bracing himself, pushing back against Lord Hamilton enough that he was receiving the brunt of the man's force, trying to spare Sebastian from the worst. 

"You love it, don't you?" Lord Hamilton whispered against Kimi's skin. "You fucking _love_ it." He inhaled deeply, then said, a greedy tone in his voice, "Pull out of him, let me watch you come." Kimi did as he was told, and Lord Hamilton immediately took his cock in hand, pulling on it roughly as he fucked Kimi even harder. "Come for me, Kimi, show me how much you love it." Kimi kept his eyes closed, going to a place deep within himself, somewhere far away from where this was actually happening. He knew perfectly well that Lord Hamilton was more than tenacious enough to keep going for as long as it took to force an orgasm out of him, so there was no choice left to him. He focused once more, somehow managing to climax, barely registering the feeling, no pleasure whatsoever in it.

His come fell on to Sebastian's skin, mixing with the fluids of others that already marked him. Kimi was now just one of many, yet another in the anonymous series of men who had violated Sebastian over his lifetime.

Lord Hamilton rested his chin on Kimi's shoulder, staring intently, still fucking him without pause. "What a stubborn fool you are," he muttered, pushing into Kimi with some violence as he finally came.

He stood behind Kimi, breathing heavily for a minute. Kimi gasped as he pulled out, and they both stepped back a little. But Lord Hamilton clearly had more in mind, snapping his fingers at one of the slaves. Max hurried over, and Lord Hamilton pointed at Sebastian's ass, the come dripping over him. "Clean that up for me, would you?" he said.

Max glanced at Kimi, taking a moment to smile at him, his lips curled into a sneer, then dropped to his knees. He bit at the backs of Sebastian's thighs, being deliberately and unnecessarily brutal in his attentions as he worked his way upwards, licking up the come that lingered on his skin. He only stopped when he reached Sebastian's buttocks, pressing his mouth between them and making a show of tonguing and sucking in an ridiculously obvious performance.

"That will do," Lord Hamilton said, pleased. "And now I think Kimi needs a kiss, doesn't he?"

"Yes, my lord," Max said, standing up, smirking delightedly as he approached Kimi. His full lips were covered with semen, and he pouted showily, a challenging look on his face.

Kimi didn't give either of them the satisfaction of the slightest hesitation, grabbing Max's face and dragging him closer, his mouth open against the boy's. Max's tongue invaded him, brazen and assured. Kimi tasted come, his own and others, and swallowed it bitterly. He bit down hard on Max's bottom lip, the metallic tang of blood mingling with the taste in his mouth. The boy yelped, backing away quickly, fingers pressed to the broken skin, scowling daggers at Kimi.

Kimi faced Lord Hamilton. "Anything else you'd like?" he snapped.

"That's all for now," Lord Hamilton replied. He seemed annoyed, as if this hadn't gone the way he'd planned. _Good_ , Kimi thought. 

"You can leave," said Lord Hamilton. "I'll send for you if I need anything further."

Kimi nodded, pulling up his breeches, not bothering to try and lace them, aware his hands were shaking too much to even attempt it. He looked over at Lord Rosberg, who was still standing, watching, as passive as ever. His face was white, the expression in his eyes seemingly somewhere between fascination and repulsion, his cock half hard. Kimi shot him a look of disgust, then turned away, making for the door. It took every single ounce of strength he possessed to walk out of the room alone and leave Sebastian there, but Kimi knew there was no choice. 

As soon as the closed the door behind him, he ran to the garderobe at end of the hall, heedless of the guards staring after him. He only just made it before vomiting violently, retching until his ribs ached and there was nothing left in his stomach but bile. He rested for a minute, trying to catch his breath and calm himself, but it was no use, so he washed his face, made a half-hearted attempt to wipe off his ass, then headed back downstairs.

He was silent as he entered the work room, only going over to his chair and sitting down with a slight wince.

After a few moments, Heikki walked over, unspeaking. He laid his hand carefully on Kimi's shoulder, giving it a gentle squeeze. Kimi reached up, resting his hand over Heikki's, knowing he understood.

There was nothing to say.


	18. Chapter 18

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sebastian returns, Kimi knows what he has to do.

Heikki eventually went back to his own table, seemingly getting on with some work, but Kimi knew him well enough to observe he was only shuffling papers around, not actually accomplishing anything. There was nothing either of them could do but wait, sit here hopelessly. 

After what seemed like forever, just as the evening was beginning to set in, there was the sound of footsteps in the hall outside, and Kimi leaped to his feet. Heikki hurried out to see who was coming. "It's them," he called out back into the room, and Kimi rushed over, his heart in his mouth to see what state Sebastian would be in. The rest of the slaves shuffled into the dormitory, looking utterly exhausted and spent. Kimi looked anxiously for Sebastian, but he wasn't among them.

"Did they keep him up there?" he asked, and Heikki shook his head, gesturing at one of the guards who walked into the room with Sebastian's limp, naked body slung over his shoulder. For a terrifying second Kimi thought he was unconscious or even dead, but as the guard roughly threw him down on the closest bed, Kimi could see his eyes, open and empty of even the slightest recognition of his surroundings. The guard muttered something to Heikki, who nodded.

Kimi kneeled beside the bed, desperately wanting to touch Sebastian in an attempt to reassure him, but he was aware that after the ordeal Sebastian had just been through, any physical contact would possibly only add to his trauma. And considering what had happened, Kimi's touch might be particularly unwelcome.

"Is he injured?" Kimi said, looking Sebastian up and down, unable to see anything obvious. He still had dried come all over him, his skin peppered with a few fresh welts. There were red marks around his ankles and wrists where he'd been bound, but nothing else that Kimi could observe.

"Let me check him, yes?" Heikki replied, and Kimi stood up, stepping back to allow him room.

He examined Sebastian's body, turning him on to his side to inspect his ass, running his hands up and down his arms and legs, feeling for any sprain or damage. 

"I think he's okay," Heikki finally stated. "He'll be sore for a while, but he's not injured."

Kimi exhaled in relief. "He just needs some time," he said. "I'll take care of him." Heikki looked at him helplessly. "What?" asked Kimi.

"The guard said they specifically requested that he be rested twenty four hours and then taken back upstairs."

Kimi stared at him in horror. "They can't do that, he's been through enough."

"That's what he said."

Kimi seethed with fury, knowing exactly why this was happening. "Lord Hamilton's just using him to try and get to me."

"Yes, he is," Heikki replied, "but we can't change that. You just have to be strong, both of you."

"Well, that's not good enough."

Heikki narrowed his eyes suspiciously. "You're not going to do anything stupid, are you?"

"Of course not," Kimi said. No, he wasn't going to do anything stupid, he was going to do the smartest thing he could, the only option available to him. He'd been left with no choice. But it would be better for both of them if Heikki had no knowledge of that. "Can we at least get him dressed?" 

"Do you think that would help him?" asked Heikki. 

"Yes," said Kimi. Sebastian's own clothes were heaven knew where up in Lord Rosberg's chambers, so Kimi went to the store room, grabbing a shirt and some breeches. He stood there for a moment, remembering the first time he'd found some clothes for Sebastian, how he'd seemed more comfortable when finally dressed. Kimi had told him he was no longer a body slave, and Sebastian had believed him. And even though Kimi had done everything within his power to make sure that was true, in the end, he'd betrayed Sebastian. He'd done as he was told, taken him. He could tell himself that he'd saved Sebastian from further harm, that the end justified the means, but the fact was inescapable.

Kimi knew that if he hadn't given in to temptation on that fateful day at the market and brought Sebastian here, he would have been dead long ago, and he couldn't help wondering if that wouldn't have been better than what the man had suffered through today. But what was done was done. Kimi had willingly taken on the responsibility of Sebastian's well-being, and he wasn't giving up now. He set his jaw, feeling more determined than ever. He took the clothes back into the dormitory where Heikki was waiting.

Between the two of them, they carefully dressed Sebastian, taking it in turns to lift his body and pull the shirt and breeches on. He was pliant in their grasp, every limb limp and heavy, his muscles slack and eyes so vacant Kimi could hardly bear to see them. When they were done, they laid him back down on his side, and Sebastian slowly curled in on himself, pulling his knees up to his chest and wrapping his arms around them.

Heikki and Kimi backed away, leaving him to rest, both hovering in the doorway of the dormitory, watching. "He'll be okay," Heikki said.

"I doubt that."

"Eventually he will be."

"No, he won't," said Kimi. None of them would be, not after this.

The two of them went back into the work room, and Kimi sat down.

"You going to stay here?" Heikki asked, and Kimi nodded in reply. "Okay," said Heikki, "but I need some sleep." He looked at Kimi. "You'll be all right?"

Kimi only nodded again.

"You know where to find me if you need anything." Heikki paused in the doorway as he turned to leave. "I'm sorry," he said, softly.

"Thanks." Kimi gave him a wryly sad smile. It wasn't much, but it helped, knowing that Heikki understood. 

Kimi sat there a while longer, not bothering to light a lantern as the darkness closed around him. He'd already made his decision, and now he could only wait. 

===

After a few hours, everything was quiet. There were only the sounds of sleep drifting in from the dormitory; heavy, deep breaths and the occasional snuffling snore. Kimi knew it was time. 

He went upstairs to their room, only trying to focus on what he needed to do right now and not think about the bigger picture, the enormity of what he was about to risk. He found a spare pair of boots that would fit Sebastian, and then rummaged around in the trunk he kept at the end of his bed. Hidden in the bottom corner was a small purse filled with coins, everything Kimi had managed to save in his years working here. He stuffed the purse into a saddlebag, along with a few clothes, and went back downstairs via the kitchen. The room was deserted, and Kimi went into the pantry, grabbing some food and wrapping it in paper. He shoved the parcel into the saddlebag and then buckled it tightly, throwing the bag over his shoulder and heading out to the stables.

The stable dogs trotted out warily at the sound of his approach, but they immediately recognized Kimi and were quiet, wagging their tails. "Hey," he said, giving a few of them a friendly pat. He worked quickly and quietly, saddling up two horses and leading them out into the courtyard, slinging their reins over a nearby rail.

There was a guard dozing fitfully in the gatehouse, and Kimi shook the man awake. "I'm taking one of the slaves to a new owner overnight," Kimi told him. "It's a rushed sale, so we'll need the gate open and ready for us to leave in a few minutes."

The man nodded sleepily, beginning to turn the lever that opened the castle's heavy gate.

Kimi went back inside and crept into the dormitory. As far as he could tell, everyone else was asleep, but even from across the room he could see Sebastian's eyes shining in the darkness as he stared out vacantly. Kimi crouched beside him. "Sebastian," he said, his voice low as he gently touched Sebastian's shoulder. "I want to help you, but you have to listen to me."

There was no reply, no sign Sebastian had even heard the words.

"Seb, please," Kimi whispered, more urgently. "We have to get you out of here."

Again there was no response, but then Sebastian sat up, his movements stiff and awkward. Kimi had no idea if he'd understood, but it seemed as if some kind of survival instinct had kicked in, the possibility of escape somehow penetrating the fog of trauma that clouded his mind. Kimi nodded at him encouragingly, and slipped the boots he'd brought on to Sebastian's feet.

"Can you walk?" he asked, but didn't wait for an answer, throwing Sebastian's arm over his shoulders, helping him to stand up and then leading him forward. Kimi was trying to be as silent as possible, not wake anyone up, but when he glanced back to see if any of the slaves had been disturbed, he suddenly saw Max. The boy's eyes were gleaming in delight as he sat up in his bed, smiling smugly at Kimi. " _Shit,"_ Kimi murmured, knowing Max wouldn't miss this opportunity, and his feeling was correct. They were barely out the door of the room before Kimi heard him shout for the guards, raising the alarm. Kimi could only grab Sebastian's hand and hold it tight, dragging him along as best he could. Sebastian half-ran, half-stumbled beside him, seemingly only just managing to stay on his feet as they made it out to the courtyard, the cobblestones slippery beneath their boots, damp with the evening dew.

Kimi could hear the guards thundering down the stairs behind them, shouting out in confusion as they tried to organize themselves and comprehend exactly what was going on. They would be here any second, Kimi thought, his mind in a panic as he tried to stay calm. He threw the saddlebag over the withers of one horse and then helped Sebastian up on to it, hoping desperately that he was in a fit enough state to ride. Kimi slapped the animal on the rump and it startled forward, racing off through the gate as Kimi jumped on to the other horse, barely making it into the saddle as took off after its stablemate.

Kimi looked back as the guards flooded into the courtyard. Some headed straight for the stable, saddling up their own horses ready to give chase, while others raced towards Kimi, trying to stop him. The gatekeeper stared back and forth, confusion on his face, clearly undecided as to what he should do. He at last started to turn the lever that would close the gates, but it was too late. Kimi was already through, galloping off in Sebastian's wake, trying to keep up.

There were footsteps running uselessly after them, but Kimi urged on his horse, catching Sebastian. He saw Sebastian was holding the reins firmly, eyes straight ahead, focused entirely on the road opening up before him.

It was only a minute or two before Kimi could hear the guards' horses nearing behind them, the lights of the torches they carried drawing closer and closer. They would be relentless in their chase, Kimi was certain. Attempted escapes by slaves were a rarity, and something that Lord Rosberg had no tolerance for. Kimi had to make sure that Sebastian wasn't captured.

He inhaled a deep breath, knowing what he had to do. He jerked on his horse's reins, attempting to slow it down. The animal fretted a little, fighting him as Sebastian's horse strode away from them but Kimi was unyielding. He looked back over his shoulder to check that he was within sight of the guards following, then veered off into the woods down a rough track, trying to draw the chase away. It was slower going here, the horse having to maneuver around rocks and tree roots, the path uneven and only roughly carved out through the trees.

He spurred his horse on, glancing backwards, pleased to note that it appeared most of the guards had followed him. He turned forward again, startling back with horror at the sight of a large fallen tree that was lying across the path, looming immediately in front of them. The horse panicked, trying to veer away, but it stood no chance. The obstacle was far too high to jump, yet the beast tried its best, lurching upwards, its chest hitting the tree with a sickening thump. 

Kimi was thrown forwards over the animal's head violently, landing awkwardly with one leg twisted up under him. For a moment he lay there, watching the horse trot away calmly, before coming back to reality, hearing the stampede of hooves approaching. He had no idea whether or not he'd injured himself, the adrenaline coursing through him masking any pain he might be feeling. The more urgent problem was that he'd winded himself severely and was struggling frantically for breath.

He tried to crawl away, perhaps find somewhere to hide, but he found he could barely move, his chest heaving as he coughed and spluttered uselessly.

The guards were on him before he had a chance. "He's here!" he heard them shout. "We've got one of them!" Several of the men leaped off their horses and grabbed Kimi, pulling him to his feet, gasping desperately for air.

The guard in charge looked at him. It was Checo, Kimi saw. He knew Kimi, of course, and though they'd never been anything more than nodding acquaintances, even that faint familiarity now meant nothing. Kimi was a criminal, a prisoner, and his former position of authority at the estate would, he had no doubt, only serve to make his treatment at the hands of the guards even worse.

"Bind him," Checo commanded his men, and two of them obeyed, shoving Kimi's hands behind his back and tying them fast with rope, then doing the same with his ankles. They let him go, and Kimi fell to the ground, still having no small amount of difficulty breathing. 

Some of the other guards galloped up, reining in their panting horses as they approached. "Did you get the other one?" Checo asked.

"We can't find him," the guards replied.

"Keep looking," said Checo. "We'll take this one back, get as many as we can organized into a search party." He didn't even use Kimi's name, frowning to himself. "And we'll need trackers out at first light. His lordship's on the warpath and there'll be hell to pay if we don't find the other one alive."

Even though Kimi was still struggling for oxygen, he sighed in relief. For now, at least, Sebastian had escaped. The longer he could avoid the guards, the more chance he would have of being able to get away. Kimi recalled gratefully that Sebastian's horse had been the one carrying the saddlebags with the money and provisions. There wasn't a huge amount of either, but the food would keep him going for a few days at least, and there was sufficient funds that he'd be able to journey far enough to escape Lord Rosberg's clutches.

Two of the guards lifted Kimi, throwing him sideways over his horse so his head was hanging down one side, his legs the other. It made it even more difficult for Kimi to breathe, but he didn't complain, grimacing in pain as the guards led the horse on, back towards the castle.

As they trotted in, Kimi could see that many of the staff had gathered in the courtyard, no doubt woken by the commotion. Flaming torches lined the stairs leading up to the door as the small crowd watched, faces solemn with concern at the sight of Kimi being pulled off the horse and dragged along, his bound ankles leaving him unable to walk. Kimi kept his head down. The only person whose gaze he bothered to meet was Heikki, who glared back at him angrily, shaking his head in disgust and turning away as Kimi mouthed _sorry_.

Lord Rosberg stood by the door, his jaw clenched tight with fury, unspeaking. Lord Hamilton was, of course, at his side, a satisfied smile on his lips. He finally had Kimi exactly where he wanted him, and Kimi knew he wouldn't hesitate to use this to his ultimate advantage.

There was an old dungeon in the basement of the castle, furnished with two barred cells that had never been used during Kimi's years at the estate. They'd mostly stored wine down there for as long as Kimi could remember, but as he was manhandled down the stone steps, he could see that the cells had both been cleared out, some straw tossed carelessly on the floor inside each.

Kimi was roughly thrown into one cell, landing heavily on the floor. A guard bent down, brandishing a knife that he used to cut through the ropes that bound Kimi's wrists and ankles. As he stood up, he kicked Kimi harshly in the stomach, laughing as he curled up in pain. "Never did like you," he said, slamming the door of the cell behind him, the lock clanking in place as he turned the key, stalking back up the stairs.

Two guards took up positions on sentry outside the bars, facing the room silently, not looking back at Kimi.

He lay there, staring across the room at the cell opposite, its door open and unbarred, waiting. There was no question who that other cell had been readied to hold, and as long as it remained empty, Kimi thought, that was all that mattered.

Sebastian was free.


	19. Chapter 19

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kimi is in trouble. Bad things happen.
> 
> **There is non-con in this chapter, but it's mostly not too graphic.**

Kimi dozed fitfully, sitting up with his back to the wall, the rough stone digging into his skin. The only light came from the torches burning steadily in their holders outside the cell and the glow of the moon that shone weakly through the tiny, barred window set high above Kimi's head.

Kimi looked up at it as the dawn broke, watching the small square of sky start to glow and then lighten with the sun's rising. One of the guards threw a stale-looking crust of bread through the bars of the cell, but Kimi ignored it, letting it lie there on the floor.

After what was perhaps a few hours, he heard the door at the top of the stairs open, and someone enter. Kimi looked up, and saw Heikki.

"Please wait outside," Heikki said to the guards on sentry duty, gesturing at the door. 

They glanced back and forth at each other nervously. "We're not supposed to…" one started hesitantly, but Heikki interrupted him.

"Just stand outside the door up there," he said impatiently. "There's no other way out, yes?"

The guards nodded, clearly not willing to disobey someone who spoke with such authority, and walked off up the stairs.

"Thanks," Kimi said, standing up with some difficulty, his body still stiff and sore. He approached the bars of the cell, but Heikki only stared at him impassively, his eyes cold with anger. "I'm sorry," Kimi added.

"What the _fuck_ were you thinking?" Heikki snapped at him.

"I wasn't thinking," replied Kimi. "I just had to save Sebastian from any more time with Lord Hamilton."

"You had to _save_ him." The word dripped with sarcasm as Heikki enunciated it. "God, you're so ridiculous, why do you have to be like this?"

"Like what?" Kimi asked, feeling miserably defensive.

"You're so fucking pig-headed with this self-sacrificing martyr act you've got going on, it's such bullshit."

"It's not an act," Kimi said stubbornly.

"Yeah, well, now I have to deal with the fucking mess you've made, and when they catch Sebastian it's going to be much, much worse for him, thanks to you."

"They won't catch him."

"His lordship's got the whole castle out there looking for him, and he's offered a huge reward to any villagers who spot him," said Heikki. "Believe me, they'll catch him."

"He can look after himself."

"I hope for his sake, that's true."

Kimi stared down at the ground for a minute, trying not to think about Sebastian, hoping with all his might that he would be safe. But he also couldn't forget that Lord Hamilton remained at the castle, still with the chance to inflict his desires on the other slaves, and that wasn't good either. Sebastian might be temporarily safe, yes, but no one else was. "What else is going on?" Kimi asked. "Have their lordships taken anyone yet today?"

"No," Heikki said. "Lord Rosberg's too angry and I think too drunk to fuck anyone and Hamilton's too busy planning what creatively terrible things he's going to do to you."

"It's that bad?"

"Oh, it's far worse," Heikki said bitterly.

"I can handle it."

"I doubt that."

"As long as Sebastian's okay, I don't care what happens to me."

"Well, maybe _I_ care what happens to you, Kimi," Heikki said sharply. "Maybe other people care. Did you ever think about that?"

Kimi had no idea how to answer that, so he didn't even try. "I really _am_ sorry for the trouble I've caused you," he said instead. "But I'm not going to apologize for getting Sebastian out of here, and I'd do it again if I had to."

"Fine." Heikki held up his hands in frustration. "I give up then," he said, and stamped off up the stairs.

The guards reappeared and once more took up their posts. Kimi sat, staring off into space as the day dragged by. He knew he was being stubborn, and Heikki had every right to be angry with him, but what he'd said was true. He didn't regret what he'd done, and given the chance, he'd do exactly the same.

Night eventually settled in, and a new shift of sentries appeared to stand silent in front of Kimi's cell. The crust of bread still sat where the guards had thrown it earlier in the day, and at last he was hungry enough to pick it up, forcing himself to eat it. He would need his strength for whatever was coming, he knew that.

There were two buckets in opposite corners of the cell, one filled with water, one empty. Kimi took a drink from one and then pissed in the other. He kicked some of the straw on the floor into as big a pile as he could manage and then lay down on his side, falling into a restless sleep.

He had no idea what time it was when a familiar, sneering tone woke him. "Hello, Kimi," Lord Hamilton said, his voice oozing condescension.

Kimi sat up, rubbing his eyes, trying to get his bearings. "What the fuck do you want?" he said.

"I just wanted to see you." Lord Hamilton shrugged his shoulders, all innocence, but Kimi knew better. "I do hope you're enjoying your new accommodations, I had Nico prepare the dungeon days ago, all ready for you and your friend."

"What?" Kimi asked, not understanding. 

Lord Hamilton smiled, baring his teeth like he was about to go in for the kill. "I just had the _strangest_ feeling you were going to try something foolish and I was so hoping you wouldn't disappoint me."

"You set this up," said Kimi, suddenly comprehending. He hadn't even thought about the fact that the cells had been so conveniently cleared out, ready and waiting as soon as he was captured.

"Your buttons always were so very easy to push," Lord Hamilton said. "It's nice that you're so reliably predictable, makes things that much simpler."

Kimi didn't reply. He'd assumed Lord Hamilton had been bluffing in his attempts to get Kimi to disobey Lord Rosberg, but it seemed those efforts were only part of much larger and more insidious plan: trying to force Kimi's hand to aid Sebastian's escape, knowing that Lord Rosberg would have no excuse to ignore such a huge betrayal.

Kim wondered if Lord Hamilton was smarter than he'd given him credit for, but no, it was simply that the man was more devious than Kimi could begin to imagine. Max had probably been in on it as well, told to stay awake and keep watch for when Kimi would make his move. God, he'd been so stupid, playing right into Lord Hamilton's trap.

But Kimi wasn't going to give him the satisfaction of conceding defeat. "I did what I had to do," he said. "Predictable or not."

"When Nico told me about the little blonde piece you're so infatuated with, I knew I had to take advantage." Lord Hamilton laughed. "And he really was an excellent fuck, wasn't he?"

Kimi bit his tongue, aware that anything he said would only egg the man on.

"I like them when they're like that, so broken, so passive and pliant." Lord Hamilton reached down and made a show of rubbing himself through his breeches. "You can do anything to them and they'll simply accept it without the slightest resistance," he said. "Though of course, there's also something to be said for someone a little feistier like you, Kimi. It really is so delightful watching you swallow your pride and take it."

"Whatever turns you on," Kimi replied curtly. 

"Oh, but it does," Lord Hamilton stated. "So much. And what turns me on even more is the knowledge that Nico's giving me carte blanche to punish you for this whole sorry escapade."

There was a time when Kimi wouldn't have believed him. He would have thought Lord Rosberg incapable of such cruelty, but now he was wiser.

"And I can't fucking wait," Lord Hamilton went on. "You've been a thorn in my ass for a long time, ever since you stole Nico from me all those years ago."

"I didn't _steal_ him," Kimi snarled. "He was never yours to begin with."

"Perhaps not." Lord Hamilton shrugged. "But I was the one there to help him, pick up the pieces after you tossed him aside."

"That wasn't what happened, and you didn't _help_ him. You used him, got inside his head when he was most vulnerable like the twisted little worm you are," Kimi spat. "You turned him into something he never was."

"I only brought out his true nature."

"You're fucking _sick_ , you always were."

Lord Hamilton smiled again, as if Kimi had paid him a compliment. To a man like him, it probably was a compliment. "But I do hope we can find your friend," he said. "I'd hate for him to miss out on what I have planned."

"You ever fucking touch him again and I'll kill you," Kimi hissed out. "And you won't find him, believe me."

Lord Hamilton smirked back at him. "Well," he said, "we'll see, won't we?" He gathered his fur-lined robes around him and swept off dramatically, leaving Kimi feeling frustrated and helpless. 

He couldn't go back to sleep, sitting waiting, thinking, staring up at the window until it was light.

The room was quiet for the rest of the day, vague sounds of the activities of the castle drifting down into the room. Kimi listened but couldn't make anything out, and soon gave up trying. At last, in what Kimi judged to be late afternoon, Lord Rosberg made his way unsteadily down the stairs.

He stood before Kimi's cell, reeking of alcohol. Kimi deliberately remained seated, knowing how much that would irritate his lordship, only giving him a silent, disdainful look.

After a few minutes, Lord Rosberg spoke. "I assume Lewis has told you I've given him permission to punish you?" he said.

"Don't want to get your hands dirty, my lord?" Kimi replied sarcastically.

Lord Rosberg smiled at him thinly. "I'm just not certain I'll be able to be as harsh on you as your actions have required me to be."

Kimi sneered back, a foul taste in his mouth. "You always were a fucking coward, weren't you?"

Lord Rosberg drew in a furious breath. "I should have fired your insolent ass years ago, you disrespectful piece of garbage."

"You would have saved my insolent ass a lot of trouble if only you had," Kimi shot back.

Lord Rosberg took a moment to compose himself before he spoke again, his voice now icily calm. "It's always saddened me what a disappointment you turned out to be, Kimi."

"The feeling is entirely mutual, _Nico_."

"You disgust me."

Kimi finally hauled himself to his feet, walking closer to the bars. "The person you're most disgusted by is _you_ , my lord," he said, relieved to be finally speaking the truth after all this time. "You hide behind all this excess and debauchery because you can't face what you've allowed yourself to become." Kimi laughed bitterly. "I always wanted to believe there was still a good man somewhere underneath all that self-loathing and vanity, but you're no deeper than a mirror, just a shallow reflection." Kimi looked at him. "You're _nothing_ ," he said, shaking his head. "Not anymore."

Lord Rosberg faltered backwards like Kimi had hit him, opening his mouth to speak, but no words were forthcoming. He turned away quickly and scurried back off up the stairs, slamming the door of the room behind him.

Kimi sat down again, waiting. When darkness fell, a group of several guards entered the room, unlocking his cell. Kimi didn't fight as they roughly stripped him of his clothes, and then took hold of his arms, dragging him upstairs and out of the dungeon, naked.

Kimi was expecting to be taken to Lord Rosberg's chambers, but instead he was led down some barely familiar halls and finally into a far smaller room. There were several reclining couches piled with cushions lining the walls, and in the center of the floor was some kind of restraining device Kimi had never seen before. He wasn't even sure how it would work at first glance, but he didn't have to wait to find out, as he was kicked off his feet and then bound swiftly. The device immobilized him in a kneeling position, bent forward slightly at the waist with his ass sticking out, his hands tied in front of him.

He looked around as much as he was able to, and judged the only people in the room were Lord Hamilton's friends, his two bodyguards, and the slaves he'd brought with him. Just one soul from Lord Rosberg's household was present and that, of course, was Max.

"Good evening, Kimi," he said. The cut on his lip where Kimi had bitten him was still visible, the mark beginning to heal.

"I hope you don't mind," Lord Hamilton said, walking over, throwing him arm around Max's shoulders. "But Max asked especially if he could help us out tonight, and he's such a sweet boy I didn't have the heart to deny him."

"Of course," Kimi replied. It didn't matter now anyway.

Kimi heard someone open the door behind him. No one spoke, but then Lord Rosberg's voice said softly, "Teach him a good lesson, but don't go too far, will you?"

"Don't you worry your pretty head, darling, I'll look after him," Lord Hamilton answered in that patronizing, obsequious tone he always used with Lord Rosberg.

"I'm leaving this in your hands, Lewis," Lord Rosberg said seriously. Kimi nearly rolled his eyes at his lordship's naivete, but then perhaps Kimi was the one who was being naive. Surely Lord Rosberg had to know what he was permitting to happen here.

But Kimi was finished trying to fathom Lord Rosberg's motivations. The man was what he was, and it was no longer Kimi's concern.

The door closed, and Kimi was alone, utterly at Lord Hamilton's mercy.

A ring gag was shoved between his teeth, holding his mouth open ready to be used, the straps of it buckled tightly around the back of his head. What felt like a large plug was pushed violently into his ass, and Kimi had to swallow hard with the effort not to make a sound at the pain of it.

He watched as Lord Hamilton stalked around in front of him, stroking the leather cords of a cat o'nine tails over his fingers, careful not to touch the ends, which Kimi could see were tipped with razor-sharp slices of metal that glinted in the light. 

"Do you like my toy?" asked Lord Hamilton. "Nico wouldn't let me use it on the slaves, so I saved it up especially for you." He swung the whip through the air gently, almost experimentally, smiling to himself, and then leaned down, tenderly stroking Kimi's face as he whispered in his ear, "I hope you'll scream for me, Kimi. We're going to take our time with this, and I want to hear you, so please don't feel you need to hold back."

Lord Hamilton stood up straight. "Ready for the show, boys?" he said.

Kimi closed his eyes as he felt the first, stinging lash of the whip.

===

He had no idea how much time passed before he began to lose consciousness, the pain at last easing as he started to drift away. He was still being flogged, and blood dripped slowly down his sides, pooling warm on the floor around his knees. He'd been reasonably certain right from the start that Lewis was going to kill him, but now he had no doubts.

Kimi thought back over his life. It hadn't been much, he knew that. He'd never produced much good or made the world a better place. In fact, he'd made it considerably worse, enabling Lord Rosberg to reign free over his stable of victims. Kimi might have tried his best, but it had never been enough. He'd never been brave enough, he knew that.

Except once. 

The one time he hadn't taken the path of least resistance, the most courageous thing he'd ever allowed himself to do. The only thing he'd ever done right: he'd loved Sebastian. Perhaps he should have cursed himself for not acting on his feelings for Sebastian sooner, knowing that they'd ended up with so little time together, but he couldn't bring himself to regret one single moment. Everything that had happened had led up to what they'd shared, and it had been nothing less than perfect.

He remembered Sebastian fucking him, the way he'd looked at him. It already seemed so long ago, a lifetime away. He could see Sebastian's eyes in front of him now, filled with life and love, drawing him in. Kimi smiled to himself, falling forward into the welcoming blue as darkness enclosed his mind.


	20. Chapter 20

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kimi is in a bad way. Sorry for the delay with this one. :(

There were voices, far away. Somewhere in another place, where the pain was. Kimi listened, detached from the scene, not entirely sure what the commotion seemed to be about.

"What have you done?" Lord Rosberg was yelling, the words rising in pitch until they were almost a scream. "Lewis, what have you done?" 

"How could you let this happen, my lord?" Heikki said, speaking at the same time, his tone one of desperate horror. Kimi wondered what was causing him such dread. "You assured me you had this under control."

"I didn't…" his lordship said. "I told him not to…"

"It's fine, he loved it…" Lord Hamilton spoke, quickly interrupted by the sickening crack of a hard fist connecting solidly with someone's jaw. That had to be Heikki, Kimi thought distantly, as his lordship couldn't throw a punch of that kind if his life depended on it. There was the sound of someone falling backward. Lord Hamilton cried out in pain, then shouted indignantly, "How dare you touch me, you ignorant _peasant_. Guards, take him now."

"No!" Lord Rosberg commanded. "Get out of here, Lewis," he continued, deadly and coldly serious. "Leave now, before I let Heikki do whatever he pleases with you."

"Oh, I'm sure he'd enjoy that, wouldn't he?" Lord Hamilton replied. "Fine, I'll go. But I'll be back, Nico. You never can resist me, you know that. You're nothing without me."

"Not anymore," Lord Rosberg stated firmly. "Not ever again." He hesitated for a moment, then said, "And take that piece of shit with you, I don't want him in my household."

"My lord…" said Max, panicked-sounding, but Lord Hamilton didn't let him finish.

"A farewell gift?" he said, his voice still dripping with condescension. "How generous of you, darling." He snapped his fingers smartly. "Come on, boys, we're leaving."

"My lord," Max repeated, pleading now, but he was ignored.

"Aw, Max," Lord Hamilton said, his voice fading as he exited. "I'm sure we'll have so much fun together, won't we?"

How many people were there? A few, Kimi thought, all leaving, the sound of shuffling feet on the flagstones of the room, echoing off down the hallway. The room was immediately quieter, and there was a metallic smell in the air. _Blood_ , he realized. Someone was bleeding.

"Shit," Heikki said. Kimi felt the straps binding him being released, and pain once more flared through him as his body slumped free from its restraints. But it wasn't so bad, surely? He could feel it, and yet he couldn't, floating somewhere as if in water, numb with cold. 

"We'll have to get him downstairs to the infirmary."

"Is he going to be okay?" Lord Rosberg asked, sounding frantic.

"No, he's not," Heikki said grimly. "His ass is…" He drew in a sharp breath. "I need to stop the bleeding there, and they've practically flayed him with the flogging, his whole back. It's a miracle he's still alive." He called out to someone. "I need a stretcher, send downstairs for a stretcher."

"I didn't know…" Lord Rosberg started, but Heikki cut him off roughly.

"Right now I'd suggest you shut the fuck up, my lord, before I'm tempted to hit you also."

"Sorry," his lordship said, almost petulantly, but Kimi could hear the anguish in his voice.

Kimi was slowly lifted from the bench, and once more everything faded into darkness.

===

He had no idea how much time passed. He was in a bed somewhere, lying on his stomach. His back throbbed with every breath he took, every single heartbeat pumping blood through his body like fire. Kimi couldn't say if he even existed outside the pain, no longer a person but a being made only of suffering. Sweat pooled underneath his body, shivering helplessly as someone wet his lips with a damp sponge and he swallowed instinctively. 

There were brief flashes of pure, intensified agony, something stinging being applied to his back and ass as Heikki muttered, "I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry," over and over and over again until Kimi was certain he must be imagining it.

And there were conversations, always soft and murmured. Kimi heard Mitch's voice, saying, "Me and some of the boys have been talking, and if you want to get some proper rest, we can watch him."

"Are you sure?" Heikki asked.

"We're sure," said Pierre.

"Okay, well," replied Heikki, "I'll just be down the hall so if he changes at all you can call out for me."

Kimi couldn't open his eyes, but he could feel the two of them standing there, hovering over him.

"Do you think he's going to die?" Pierre asked tentatively.

There was a pause before Mitch answered, "I don't know."

"Why did he try and run away? He must have known he'd be punished, helping a slave escape."

Mitch sighed. "I guess they must have had something going."

"Aren't they still looking for Sebastian?" said Pierre.

"No," replied Mitch, "Heikki told me that when Lord Hamilton got kicked out, his lordship called off the search."

Kimi exhaled, and fell back into a feverish, restless unconsciousness.

===

He knew he wasn't dead, not yet. Sometimes he couldn't be sure, but mostly he understood that this was still life, that time was passing whether or not he managed to be aware of it. What he couldn't understand was _why_ he continued to live, some tiny flame inside him that refused to be extinguished, burning brightly even through this.

He was _waiting_ for something, he was sure.

Something, _someone_. All he had to do was hold on.

"He needs proper care, my lord, better than what I can provide for him. He needs to be treated by a physician," Heikki was saying as Kimi drifted back into awareness.

"I've sent for the best available," Lord Rosberg replied, "but it's not easy to find someone at such short notice."

"How long before they can get here?" asked Heikki.

"At least a week, perhaps two," his lordship said, his voice grimly resigned.

"With all due respect," Heikki said, sharp, "that's not good enough."

"It's all I can do." 

"You owe him better than that."

"You're in no position to tell me what I do or don't owe him," snapped Lord Rosberg.

"I'm inclined to believe that we _all_ need to remember what we owe Kimi, my lord," Heikki retorted. "We all let this happen."

"Do I need to be reminded of that?" his lordship said. "Don't you think I feel bad enough?"

"No," Heikki replied icily, "I don't think you do."

"Well, you're wrong." 

Someone gently touched Kimi's hand, held his fingers for a brief moment.

===

There was no sense of day or night, not even hours or minutes, only the present moment, replayed endlessly. "How is he?" Kimi heard Toto ask.

"Bad," Heikki answered. "And he's getting worse. His back is severely infected and the wounds are so large and deep that there's very little I can do." 

"Lord Rosberg's sent for a physician?"

"Yes, but he won't be here for another week, possibly more."

"Can he last that long?"

Kimi heard Heikki inhale. "I don't know," he said. "I'm not sure. He's strong but..." His voice faded off.

The two of them were silent for a minute, and Kimi wondered if he'd drifted away enough that they'd left the room without him hearing, but then Toto spoke again. "You know, he came to me the night before Lord Hamilton arrived, tried to get me to talk to Nico."

"And you said no?" Heikki replied.

"I did," Toto said quietly. "I was sure things would blow over before it went too far. I know his lordship is capable of petty cruelties, but I would never have believed he'd allow something like this." He took a deep breath. "I should have spoken to him when Kimi asked."

"It probably wouldn't have helped," said Heikki. "I know Kimi tried, but his lordship wouldn't listen."

"Well," Toto stated, "from now on, he's going to listen. Whether he likes it or not."

"You can make that happen?"

"I _will_ make that happen. I once made a promise to his lordship's father, and I have not been strict enough in my efforts to hold myself to that promise."

"Then perhaps," Heikki replied, "you and I need to work together more closely? Make sure no one falls back into old habits?"

"Most certainly," Toto agreed.

Heikki paused for a moment, and Kimi swore he could almost _hear_ him thinking. "Just hypothetically, let's say," he went on, in a careful, neutral tone, "if someone was arriving here tomorrow, someone who could take Kimi to a place where he'd receive proper care, would you back me up with his lordship? Make certain that he wouldn't prevent Kimi from leaving?"

"If it meant Kimi had a better chance, then yes, of course," said Toto. "Definitely."

"Definitely," Heikki echoed. "Okay, then."

===

Someone was carefully stroking Kimi's hair; cool, smooth fingers carding through the sweat-matted strands. There wasn't much time left, he suddenly realized. He'd been waiting for what felt like so long, holding on stubbornly, but he could feel the end approaching. Perhaps it was time to let go. 

"I'm sorry, Kimi, I'm so very sorry," Lord Rosberg was whispering. "I was just so angry at you, I've been angry at you for so long…" His lordship sniffed ungracefully, voice thick with tears. "And you were right, what you said. It's not you I hate, it's myself. But I can change, I promise. I know you don't want to be with me, but if you just stay with us I'll show you that I can change." There was the sound of a stifled sob before Lord Rosberg continued. "Please, Kimi, _please_. Just stay, just a little longer."

But what was left? What was there to stay for?

"Please," Lord Rosberg whispered once more, as Kimi heard the door of the room open.

His lordship turned, then leaped violently to his feet, the chair he'd been sitting in clattering back roughly behind him. " _You_ ," he hissed venomously to whoever had entered the room. "How dare you show your face here, how _dare_ you."

The voice that replied was thin with uncertainty and fear, but it was also clear, unwavering. "Hello, Nico," the voice said, and in one huge, pain-filled rush Kimi was crashing straight back into reality, even the slightest inclination towards surrender immediately vanishing.

He was here, at last. It was Sebastian.


	21. Chapter 21

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sebastian to the rescue, with a little help from the others. :)
> 
> And just a note to say that I'm sorry I haven't answered the comments on the last chapter yet!! I will do it because you all are lovely but I just wanted to get this posted now.

Kimi willed himself to move, to speak, even only to open his eyes, but his body simply wouldn't respond. He lay there, listening helplessly, consciousness returning to him with alarm as it gradually dawned on him: Sebastian was here. He was actually here; this wasn't some delirium caused by Kimi's fever, but reality. And while Lord Hamilton might be seemingly gone for good, Lord Rosberg couldn't be trusted not to exact immediate and swift revenge on Sebastian for daring to escape. Kimi was certain that all the conciliatory words his lordship had just been whispering about promises to change and becoming a better man would mean nothing in the face of his fury at being confronted by Sebastian.

Sebastian wasn't safe, he couldn't ever be safe here. _No_ , Kimi screamed inside his head, but there was only silence.

"Hello, Nico," Sebastian had said, and Kimi knew the use of his name would only further enrage Lord Rosberg. What the hell did Sebastian think he was even _doing_ here?

Lord Rosberg huffed out a short, disdainful snort before replying to Sebastian's greeting in an exaggeratedly sarcastic tone. "Oh, I see," he said, "we're on first name terms now, are we? You'll forgive me if I don't respond in kind, as I don't actually know your name." He laughed. "You seem to have forgotten that you're a slave. You're _my_ slave and now that you've come crawling back I'll be exercising my right to fairly punish you."

"Fair punishment?" Sebastian asked. "Is that what you've done here, to Kimi? A _fair_ punishment?"

Kimi could almost hear Lord Rosberg bristle with indignation. "That wasn't me. And it was a mistake, I will admit, I…" Before he could continue, Sebastian swiftly interrupted.

"And you used to know my name," he said. His voice was calm, with a resolute, underlying strength, but Kimi knew him well enough to hear the fear lurking behind the words. What it must be costing him to be here, facing Lord Rosberg like this, Kimi couldn't begin to fathom.

"I highly doubt that," his lordship replied dismissively.

But Sebastian wouldn't be dissuaded, saying, "It's Sebastian, Sebastian Vettel."

There was a pause, and Kimi pictured his lordship trying to take in that information, not letting his demeanour slip as he digested the fact. "Well," he said finally, "I wouldn't have recognized you. Though you were merely an insignificant pain in my ass back then and you remain so. I heard what happened to your family all those years ago. Shame your father was such a dissolute waste of space, I'm not surprised he pissed away your fortunes." Sebastian didn't reply, and Lord Rosberg went on, his voice gaining strength as he continued, reaching a crescendo of anger. "You think because you used to be a noble that means you have some kind of status? That you can come here, talk to me like this?" he asked incredulously. "It doesn't mean a thing. It means less than nothing, just as _you_ mean less than nothing. You're lower than low. You're my property and I'll do as I please with you."

"That's all anyone is to you, aren't they? Just _property_ ," Sebastian said disgustedly. "Not just your slaves, but everyone. Even Kimi." 

Kimi heard Lord Rosberg take a step forward, and he held his breath. "Please don't dare to presume you know anything at all about me and Kimi," his lordship snapped. 

"I know that you used to be together," Sebastian said, standing his ground.

"Did he tell you that?" Lord Rosberg scoffed. "I don't believe you."

"No," replied Sebastian, "he didn't tell me. But he didn't have to, it's plain to see. Plain as the fact that you fucked him over, tossed him aside like garbage, but you still couldn't let go. You'd rather let Lord Hamilton nearly kill him than see him happy with someone else."

"That's not true."

"Look at him," Sebastian almost shouted. "Look at what you've done to him. You don't think he deserves better than this?"

His lordship laughed bitterly in reply. "You think you could do so much better? How could someone like you give Kimi the life he deserves? What could you ever do for him?"

"Well," said Sebastian, seeming to rein himself in and speak more evenly, "right now I can take him to a place where he'll be cared for properly. There's an excellently qualified physician waiting on standby, ready to treat him."

"What?" Lord Rosberg replied, his anger and haughtiness all at once vanishing. "There is? Where?"

"Viscount Coulthard's estate. He has a full-time physician on staff who's been appraised of Kimi's condition and is willing to care for him."

"Oh, you've wormed your way in over there, have you?" Lord Rosberg said. "David always was a soft touch for a pathetic sob story like yours." He was silent for a minute, apparently considering. "Do you think it's wise to move him?"

"I don't think we have any choice." For the first time since he'd entered the room, Sebastian's voice wavered. "I'll come back, if you want," he said, "you can punish me if you need to, but right now the only thing that matters is looking after Kimi." 

This time, before Lord Rosberg could answer, another voice suddenly chimed in. "That's a generous offer, Sebastian, but given everything you endured with Lord Hamilton, I'm sure Lord Rosberg feels no further punishment will be needed." It was Heikki, speaking with steady, irrefutable conviction. "As you say, we need to focus on Kimi."

"Excuse me?" Lord Rosberg exclaimed. "When the _fuck_ did that become your decision?"

And now Toto spoke up. "When you, my lord, made it necessary," he said firmly. "There's a carriage waiting outside and Kimi will be moved immediately." Kimi heard Lord Rosberg begin to speak but Toto kept going without the slightest pause, ignoring his lordship's faint protests completely. "And Sebastian will be accompanying him, as I've just completed his sale to Viscount Coulthard."

"You sold him without my permission?" asked Lord Rosberg, disbelieving. 

"You're always telling me not to bother you with trivial estate matters, my lord," Toto replied casually, "I thought it of no consequence to accept an excellent offer on a minor household slave."

The room was silent, the tension so palpable Kimi could feel it prickling over his skin. But at last, Lord Rosberg said, "Fine. Whatever." His customary petulance was gone, replaced by what sounded like resigned surrender.

"Okay," Heikki stated, and others entered the room. Kimi couldn't tell how many, but there were at least two familiar voices: Mark and Dan. 

" _Shit_ ," Kimi heard Dan whisper at the sight of him, but he didn't hesitate, helping to lift Kimi on to a stretcher and then maneuvering him out the door.

Kimi gritted his teeth, trying stay conscious through the pain and fever as he was carried outside and loaded into what had to be some kind of wide, covered landau, the stretcher resting lengthways between the seats.

A cool but violently trembling hand stroked over his forehead, and Kimi instantly felt more relaxed, recognizing Sebastian's touch. "He's burning hot," Sebastian said, all the emotion he'd been restraining while confronting Lord Rosberg now evident in his voice. "Oh god, I never should have left him, what did they do to him?"

"We'll get him to the doctor fast as we can," Dan reassured him, then asked, "What about you, are you okay?"

"I'm all right," Sebastian answered quickly.

"That was full-on, going in there to face Lord Rosberg by yourself." Dan sounded rightfully concerned. "Are you sure?"

"Yes," said Sebastian. "I had to do it, for myself and for Kimi. I won't cower to men like him, not anymore. I'm done hiding."

Kimi heard the driver urge the horses forward, the first movement of the carriage sending enough pain shooting through him that he once more slipped exhausted into grateful unconsciousness.

===

There were voices, again, so far away that Kimi had to concentrate in order to be able to hear them.

"This is a very, very severe infection," a formal-sounding man stated. "I'll do everything I'm able to, but you should prepare yourself for the worst." He exhaled. "If I'd been able to treat him sooner, then…"

"He's strong," someone said. Was it Sebastian, Kimi wondered? It sounded like him. It had to be him. "I know he'll make it. He has to."

"Well, if he's strong-willed and wants to live, then that's the best medicine of all. For now I'll apply a poultice, try to draw out the worst of it," the first man said. "And I'll give him a tonic that might help the fever. He'll need to be dosed every three hours for a few days, can you deal with that?"

"Absolutely," came the reply. It _was_ Sebastian, Kimi thought, suddenly remembering what had happened, that he was now at Viscount Coulthard's estate. The memory of Sebastian confronting Lord Rosberg felt more like something he'd dreamed, but it had all been real.

And that meant he had to fight this, he knew. There was no question of it. Death still called to him, oblivion sweetly singing his name but Kimi was never even tempted to answer, holding on with every ounce of strength he possessed.

===

As best as Kimi could make out, Sebastian almost never left his side, changing the dressings on his back, gently wetting his lips with a sponge, cradling and lifting his head to carefully dose him with the foul-tasting tonic. In the rare times when Sebastian wasn't there, Dan was. Sebastian was mostly silent; occasionally murmuring quiet, soothing words, but when Kimi was alone with Dan, he was regaled with stories of everything that was going on in Viscount Coulthard's household: how they'd had "awesome" roasted quail for dinner last night, that one of the kitchenhands was hooking up with one of the footmen and while they thought no one knew, it was all anyone was talking about, that Viscount Coulthard's favorite horse was lame and he'd postponed his hunting trip… it went on. Kimi liked to listen, the stories making him feel more connected to the world, helping him to cling to what was real.

Sometimes Jev would wander in, sit with Dan a while. It made Kimi smile inside to hear them with each other; the playful, teasing banter that passed between them so affectionate it was impossible not to be charmed.

But today they were quieter, more serious. "Do you think he can hear us?" Jev asked.

"I bet he can," Dan replied. "I'll bet you anything soon he'll just sit up and put that grumpy Iceman voice on and tell me to stop fucking around and get back to work." Dan assumed an exaggerated imitation of Kimi's usual monotone. "'What do you think you're doing? Why are you smiling at me? Stop smiling!''"

Jev laughed. "Okay, but you know if he can hear you talk like that, he _will_ kill you when he wakes up."

Dan laughed along with him, almost wistfully. "I don't care," he said, "he can kill me all he likes, as long he _does_ wake up."

===

How long had it been? Days, perhaps? A week? He tried to think, but someone was close by, so instead he listened.

"I know you can hear me," Sebastian whispered. "I know you're going to come back to me, aren't you?" Kimi felt the bed beside him dip as Sebastian laid himself down, moving slowly. He was careful not to get too close, mindful of Kimi's injuries, but Kimi could feel him, the weight of his body lying next to Kimi, exactly where he belonged. "I know that I'm strong enough to live without you, I know because you were the one who showed me how strong I am, but Kimi…" Sebastian's fingers brushed across Kimi's cheekbone, and Kimi heard him swallow hard. "I don't _want_ to live without you, I need you. I need you to come back to me. I want to spend the rest of my life with you, if you'll let me, please?"

_Yes_ , Kimi answered, inside his mind, trying desperately to form the word, say it aloud, but all that seemed to come out was an ugly, guttural-sounding grunt.

Had that been out loud? Kimi couldn't tell, but he quickly realized Sebastian must have heard the noise, as he gasped, somewhere between shock and delight. " _Kimi?_ " he said hesitantly, waiting for a minute before leaning closer and softly kissing Kimi's lips. "I knew you were here," he said. "I knew it." 

_Always_ , Kimi thought but this time there was no sound. He let his mind slip away once more, safe in the knowledge that he wasn't going anywhere.

===

Kimi opened his eyes just a little, squinting in the light of the room. As best as he could see, it was only illuminated by a fire burning in the grate, but even that was painfully bright.

He managed to move his arm slightly, open up the fingers of his hand, trying to signal, and Sebastian was straight away at his side, carefully taking Kimi's hand in both of his own, holding it like a precious, weighted treasure.

"Sorry," Kimi muttered, the word barely intelligible even to his own ears, but of course Sebastian understood.

"Sorry for what?" he whispered, smilling, tears visible in those blue eyes as he gently stroked Kimi's hand.

"Hamilton and the others, I'm sorry." He tried to go on, wanting to explain, but his voice was already fading. "Sorry I fucked you," he managed to grit out, and then closed his eyes again.

"No," Sebastian said. "No, I know you had to. I'd still be there, even Hamilton might still be there if you hadn't. I know that, I understand." He ran his fingers through Kimi's hair. "You're strong, you always do what's necessary, however difficult it is." He was silent for a second and then said, "I'm sorry I left you there, in the woods with the guards. I'm sorry I kept running, but I didn't know what else to do."

Kimi squeezed Sebastian's hand as best he could, gripping it weakly in his own. "No," he murmured. "It's okay." He already felt exhausted, but he knew for certain that he'd turned the corner and that at last the fever and infection were abating. Darkness beckoned to him, and for the first time it wasn't the cold, empty hollow of unconsciousness, but warmth and peace of a deeply healing sleep. 

He breathed in, and held Sebastian's hand, not letting go.


	22. Chapter 22

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I completely do not understand how you can write more than 50k of words and be like three chapters from the end of a story and suddenly get writer's block so bad you're basically frozen for two months but at least it wasn't permanent, I guess? Sorry!! :(
> 
> But anyway, Kimi continues to get better, things move on.

Kimi had no idea how long he'd been asleep when he finally stirred back into wakefulness, but he was straight away aware that this was different. This time he was truly awake, fully in the present moment and that half-reality, half-delirium induced dream feeling that been his permanent state as he slipped in and out of consciousness was completely gone. He still felt weak and light-headed, of course, but there was no question that he was past the worst of it.

He took a deep breath and was able to shift his head enough to look across the room. Sebastian was there, fast asleep on small, uncomfortable-looking bed shoved awkwardly in the corner. It seemed he hadn't even bothered to undress or get under the covers, as he was slumped there on his side, fully clothed. Even in sleep he looked exhausted, and Kimi felt a surge of guilt, guessing that Sebastian hadn't exactly been looking after himself while trying to help Kimi recover.

There was no reason to wake him, so Kimi lay there, perfectly content to simply watch Sebastian for a while, secure in the knowledge that they were together and, more importantly, that they were _safe_. Kimi had no idea what the future held for the two of them, but he knew they were away from harm and for now that was the only thing that mattered.

Eventually Sebastian began rouse himself from his slumber, shifting and stretching until he sat up and looked over at Kimi, meeting his eyes. For a split second he appeared almost shocked, completely taken aback, but then his face lit up from within as he smiled. "Good morning," he said.

"Morning," Kimi replied.

"How are you feeling?" Sebastian asked.

Kimi tried to shrug, but his shoulders barely moved, and what motion there was made him wince in pain. "I'm okay," he said firmly.

Sebastian nodded, still smiling, now seeming a little amused at Kimi's stubbornness. "Do you want some water?"

"Please," said Kimi. He felt a flash of annoyance at the fact that he had to allow Sebastian to wait on him hand and foot like some kind of helpless invalid, but silently remonstrated with himself to be gracious about the situation. This was only a temporary state, after all, and there was the constant memory of the fact that he'd once cared for Sebastian in a similar way. And while his ego might want to believe that that wasn't the same thing at all, he knew that simply wasn't true.

Sebastian brought over a mug, gently lifting Kimi's head and holding it to his lips. Kimi was surprised how thirsty he was, and drank deeply. "Thank you," he said when he was finished.

"You're welcome," replied Sebastian. "And the physician should be here soon to check up on you." He paused, looking down at Kimi. "Anything else you need?"

"No, I'm good."

"Okay," Sebastian said. He turned, busying himself with straightening up the room, making his own bed, stoking up the fire, going to fetch more water, taking out a pile of dirty linen that was sitting in the corner. Every so often he'd glance back over his shoulder and smile at Kimi, who lay there silently, still thinking back to when he'd been the one looking after Sebastian. He supposed they'd come full circle in some way, and it felt both strange and miraculous. Kimi had been so sure he'd never see Sebastian again but here they were, going on with life. 

Maybe, Kimi allowed himself to muse, just maybe Sebastian wasn't the only one who'd underestimated his own tenacity and ability to survive. Perhaps Kimi, too, was stronger than he'd ever realized.

After a time, the physician knocked on the door. "I see you're back with us," he said as he entered the room. He wasn't smiling, but there was a kindness and sense of relief in the words, and Kimi nodded.

"I hope so," he said.

"Well," the physician replied, "let's see, shall we?" He was a small, serious looking man with gray hair and a beard, who frowned to himself as he carefully examined Kimi, removing the dressing that covered the wounds on Kimi's back. He touched the raw, exposed skin gently, but Kimi still flinched in pain, unable to help the reaction. Out of the corner of his eye, he could see Sebastian waiting anxiously nearby.

"That's good," the man said. "The infection is receding and the fever has definitely broken, so you're on the mend." He turned to face Sebastian before he went on, saying, "You've done an excellent job with caring for him, so if you can continue to keep the injuries clean I'd suggest leaving the dressings off at least during the day." He now looked back at Kimi. "And if you can perhaps start to change position a little, lie on your side if you can bear it, I think that would help."

"Can I sit up?" Kimi asked hopefully.

The physician regarded him kindly. "Give it a few days," he said. "You've been through a lot, don't risk a relapse by pushing yourself too far." He moved aside, murmuring some further instructions to Sebastian. Kimi laid still, reminding himself that he had to be patient. This man's skill and treatments had helped save him, and Kimi knew it would be best for everyone if he continued to follow his advice, frustrating as it might be.

The physician was just leaving the room when another visitor arrived, and there was no missing this one. "The Iceman returns!" Dan exclaimed, grinning widely as he practically leaped in through the door. "I heard downstairs you were waking up."

Kimi recalled Dan's words from a few days before, and put on his grumpiest voice. "Why are you smiling about it?" he said. "Stop smiling." 

Dan instantly understood the joke, laughing delightedly. "You _were_ listening, I knew it."

"I was always listening," Kimi replied. "You talked a whole lot of shit, if I remember right."

"You loved it, man," Dan told him, and Kimi couldn't deny it.

"Yeah," he admitted. "I liked it." He shifted to look up at Dan as best he could. "Thank you for helping," he said.

"Ah, no problem." Dan shrugged. "I just filled in when I could, Seb here did the bulk of it."

"I know he did," replied Kimi, giving Sebastian an affectionate sidelong look. Sebastian met his gaze and yet again, smiled.

===

Kimi continued to improve over the next few days, and though everyone seemed pleased with his progress, he himself found it almost unbearably slow. He was soon able to turn over enough to lie on his side, and the change in position was a huge relief after being stuck lying on his stomach for what felt like an age. Within a week, the physician had given him the all-clear to try sitting up, and Kimi was determined to make it work, so sick of lying in bed dependent on others for his every need that he was ready to scream in frustration.

"Are you sure?" Sebastian asked, worry in his voice. He and Dan were stationed either side of Kimi, and they looped their hands underneath his arms.

"I'm ready," Kimi replied, steeling himself, knowing this wasn't going to be pleasant. But it would be worth it. Sebastian and Dan gradually raised Kimi's torso up off the bed, his muscles straining with unfamiliar use as they helped turn him until he was finally sitting upright. 

He felt so dizzy and lightheaded that he swayed back and forth for a second, but he held steady. Blood rushed down through the healing wounds on his back, the pain of it truly agonizing. Kimi closed his eyes for a second, knowing it would pass as his circulation righted itself, trying to bear it in the meantime.

Dan and Sebastian hovered beside him, hesitantly holding out their hands as if they were waiting for him to fall, their tension and concern heavy in the air, making Kimi feel as if he couldn't breathe. He gritted his teeth through the hurt, making an ineffectual attempt to bat away Sebastian's outstretched arms. "Stop fussing," he barked sharply, his irritation boiling over for just a moment. 

The two of them stepped back warily. They both looked cautiously at Kimi, who finally exhaled as the worst of it passed. "Sorry," he said, "I'm okay now." 

He watched as Sebastian and Dan met each other's gaze and then suddenly burst into relieved laughter. "Wow," Dan said, grinning happily, "our cranky Kimi's back."

"He must be feeling better," Sebastian chimed in. He appeared more relaxed than Kimi had seen him in some time and the sight made Kimi's heart feel lighter, another burden lifting. "Anyway," said Sebastian, "I need to go and get some fresh water and some food for us." He looked at Dan. "Will you stay here with him?"

"I can look after myself," Kimi grumbled, though he knew perfectly well that wasn't yet true. 

Dan only smiled and said. "Sure thing."

When Sebastian had left the room and enough time passed that he had to be out of earshot, Kimi finally spoke. "Can I ask you something?" he said to Dan. He shifted a little, wincing as he tried to sit more comfortably

"Course you can." Dan pulled a chair closer and sat himself down beside the bed.

Kimi wasn't sure he wanted an answer to the question he had in mind, but this was something needed to know. He took a deep breath before he went on. "How did Sebastian first get here?" 

"Oh," replied Dan, frowning at whatever memories the query brought forth. "He just turned up one day. It was…" Dan shook his head, his usual optimistic self completely subdued. "It was bad."

"How bad?"

" _Really_ bad," Dan said. "He was terrified, like crazy with it, and all he could say was that he had to get back, go after you."

Kimi listened carefully as Dan went on.

"From what he said later," Dan continued, "he'd been hiding in the woods from Lord Rosberg's search parties, and they'd nearly caught him more than once. And then he'd gotten completely lost trying to make it here."

Kimi took in the information, thinking. It was nothing worse than he'd expected, but the idea of Sebastian alone, being hunted by Lord Rosberg's guards as if he was an animal, made him sick with anger "Did he tell you what happened with Lord Hamilton?"

"Not for a bit," said Dan. "At first we couldn't get him to tell us anything, he was so dead set on going straight back over there to you. We had to stop him, like physically stop him from taking one of the horses and just leaving." Dan stared down at the floor for a minute. "He told me some of what they did," he said quietly, then looked at Kimi. "He told me what they made you do."

Kimi didn't say anything. He didn't want to talk about it, and he knew Dan wouldn't push him. But it helped somehow, just knowing that someone like Dan was aware what had happened and understood exactly how bad it had been. Kimi might not have always been so easy to get along with over the years, but Dan had never failed to stand by him, and that meant more than he could ever say.

"Anyway," said Dan, "Viscount Coulthard was awesome about it all, so Mark looked after Seb, and me and Jev went to Lord Rosberg's, snuck in through the back to the kitchens and Rob let us talk to Heikki." Dan relaxed back into something more of his normal cheer. "He told us you were in a bad way and in need of a doc so we sent word back and Seb was there with the cavalry by the next day." Dan grinned again. "And here we are."

"Here we are," said Kimi, hardly able to believe everything that had unfolded. He thought to himself for a moment, then asked, "How's he been since then?"

"Honestly, he seems pretty all right, considering. Once we got you back here he calmed down a lot and since then, he's just been focused on looking after you."

Kimi nodded to himself. He would do anything to make sure Sebastian was okay, but it wasn't just a matter of recovery. There were other things that needed to be fixed. "Could you maybe ask Viscount Coulthard if I can speak with him sometime?" he said, knowing what had to be done.

Dan eyed Kimi suspiciously. "You got a plan?"

"I just want to get something sorted out," Kimi evaded.

Dan laughed, not questioning him further. "I'll tell him you'd like a chat."

Sebastian walked back through the door, carrying a pitcher of water and some plates of food, and Dan immediately jumped up. "I'll see you guys later, then," he said, bouncing out of the room in his usual energetic fashion.

"What was that about?" Sebastian asked, looking after him.

"Who knows?" Kimi replied, waiting until Sebastian had put down the pitcher and plates before he said, "Can you come here?"

Sebastian walked over and sat down on the bed beside Kimi, facing him. "Is something wrong?" he asked, seeming concerned.

"I'm fine," said Kimi firmly. Just to be able to sit here and look into Sebastian's eyes felt like more than Kimi could have ever hoped for when he was back in that room with Lord Hamilton. Kimi pushed the thought out of his mind, knowing it was completely in the past now and didn't belong here. He was determined not to allow anything to sully their future together. He tried to lift his hand to caress Sebastian's face, but the pain was too much, so he settled for resting his palm on Sebastian's thigh. Just that touch was enough to ground him, make him feel at ease.

He breathed in. "But I'd like to kiss you," he said. "If that would be okay?"

Sebastian didn't answer but leaned forward eagerly, briefly pressing his lips against Kimi's. He went to pull away but Kimi followed, not breaking the kiss, and Sebastian relented, moving back in. Kimi inhaled the sweet, earthy scent of Sebastian's skin, feeling the familiar softness of his lips, knowing he was finally back where he belonged.

Kimi closed his eyes as Sebastian's mouth gradually opened, full and blossoming. Kimi mirrored the movement with his own lips, unable to stop himself from sighing in pleasure when Sebastian's tongue slid into his mouth. It was everything he'd been waiting for, and though the kiss was deeper and more sensual than he could have imagined, it didn't feel sexual, not at all.

This was purely about the connection between them, and it was as if nothing had happened, like they'd never been apart from one another. Kimi had never doubted that the bond between them was unbreakable, but now he was even more certain of it. 

When at last they parted, Kimi smiled. "Thanks," he said.

"You're welcome," Sebastian replied, laughing softly.

Kimi looked at him seriously. "You saved my life," he said. _In so many ways_ , he wanted to add, but he knew Sebastian understood.

"Well," said Sebastian, lightly, "you saved mine. I owed you." 

Kimi felt his smile widening into a grin. "I guess we're even then," he teased.

Sebastian smiled back at him fondly, eyes alight with happiness. "I guess we are."


	23. Chapter 23

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Some things are resolved, and Kimi and Seb finally move on.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And that’s the end of it all!! I can't believe it's actually done!! Thank you to everyone for reading and commenting along the way, it has been an absolute joy to get so much support and feedback from you all. :D

After a few days, Kimi was mostly able to raise himself up into a sitting position without help, but Sebastian always insisted on standing nearby, waiting to assist should Kimi need it. This morning, though, he'd managed quite well on his own, and felt stupidly pleased about it. It might not be much of an achievement in the grand scheme of things, but it was solid progress.

"All good?" Sebastian checked in before he stepped back.

"All good," Kimi answered. He might still be frustratingly weak, but now that he'd beaten the fever and infection he was improving rapidly, and the physician had given him permission to try walking around a bit within the week. Kimi couldn't wait to finally get out of bed but he knew better than to rush things. Sebastian and Dan would kill him, apart from anything else.

"Okay," Sebastian said, rearranging the blankets so Kimi's legs were properly covered and propping some pillows up behind him. Kimi endured the fussing patiently. Since talking to Dan he'd started to realize that taking care of him was, at least partially, something of a coping strategy for Sebastian, so he was making an effort not to be snappish when Sebastian went all mother hen on him. He knew they'd come a long way already, but that they both still needed to process what had happened, and he was in no hurry to force anything. They had all the time in the world now.

Sebastian startled slightly at the sound of a knock on the open door of the room, and Kimi turned to look. Heikki was standing there, a hesitant expression on his face, as if he wasn't certain he'd be welcome.

"Hey," Kimi said, warmly.

"Come in," Sebastian added, smiling.

"Hey," Heikki replied, walking inside. His gaze raked up and down over Kimi, visibly swallowing hard at the sight of him. Kimi knew he still didn't look so great, but he also knew he probably looked about a thousand times better than the last time Heikki had seen him.

Sebastian dragged a chair up next to Kimi's bed. "Sit down, make yourself comfortable," he said to Heikki. "I've got to go and talk to Fernando down in the kitchen," he continued, "so I'll leave you two, if that's all right?"

"Sure," Kimi said, aware Sebastian was trying to give them some space. It wasn't necessary, but he still appreciated the gesture, watching as Sebastian left the room with a glance back over his shoulder.

Heikki sat down, facing Kimi. "It's good to see you," he said. The statement was simple but the emotion in his voice was anything but that.

"You too," Kimi replied, meaning it sincerely. 

Neither of them spoke as Heikki leaned over and took Kimi's hand, holding it for a minute, squeezing it hard in his own. Kimi squeezed back, though his grip was no longer any match for Heikki's.

They looked at each other silently, both conveying exactly what they needed to without a single word, until Heikki nodded, smiling with relief as he released Kimi's hand and sat back in his chair.

"So," Kimi said, "how are things at the estate?"

"Oh," Heikki replied. "Well. There's been a few changes."

"Really?" said Kimi, surprised.

"Yeah, I mean things are what they are, there's no changing that." Heikki shrugged resignedly. "But quite a few of the body slaves moved over to household duties when we offered them the chance. I've got Mitch and Pierre helping me out with the books and the rest of the administration, and they're doing really well."

"They're both smart," Kimi agreed, "I imagine they'd be good at that."

"Also Toto's set up some very strict rules about how the rest of the body slaves can be used."

"Like what?"

"Like time limits on how often they're taken, how long before they're given a break, those kind of things," explained Heikki. "And they're allowed to say no to certain acts if they wish to."

Kimi was pleased at the news. "How's his lordship taking that?" he asked. He had to smirk a little at the thought of Lord Rosberg having to deal with Toto now.

"He's been hanging around pouting and sulking a lot, but I'm pretty sure it's mostly for show." Heikki shook his head ruefully, laughing briefly. "Honestly, I think he's the happiest he's been in a long time, he seems far more relaxed now Toto's keeping him on a tight leash."

"He always was pretty lost when left to his own devices," Kimi agreed.

"Toto's vetting all his friends too," added Heikki. "He hasn't been allowed any visitors till now, but the Duke of Button's coming to stay next week so we'll see how that goes."

"Button's okay," Kimi said. "He'll give you some shit but it's all just stirring, and he takes care with the slaves."

"Good to know," Heikki replied.

They talked on for a while longer, mostly just catching up on gossip and idle chat, until Sebastian returned, wandering in. He held back for a minute until Kimi beckoned him over. He perched awkwardly on the edge of the bed, but soon started to relax as he joined in the conversation, particularly interested to hear about Mitch and Pierre taking over his old job. 

Finally, Heikki stood up. "I better get back."

"So soon?" Sebastian asked. "It's a long journey, are you sure don't want to stay, have something to eat with us?"

"No, I don't want to be gone too long," said Heikki. "I just needed to see for myself that everything was all right."

"I can understand that," Sebastian told him.

Heikki gently rested his hand on Sebastian's shoulder, looking at him seriously. "I'm trusting you to take good care of him," he said.

"I promise," Sebastian responded. "Absolutely."

Heikki nodded, satisfied. "And you," he said, pointing at Kimi, still gripping Sebastian's shoulder with his other hand, "you look after this one, yes?"

"Of course," replied Kimi. 

"Good," Heikki said, as if it was all settled.

===

"I know that legally he's your property…" Kimi hated to use the word 'property', but it was true.

Viscount Coulthard smiled as he replied, "I don't think he belongs to anyone but you."

"So you'll help me?"

"I can take care of that, yes," Viscount Coulthard assured Kimi. "The paperwork will take some time, but it's a relatively simple procedure so I'll get Mark started on it."

"I would be most thankful, my lord," Kimi said. It was the first day he'd been out of bed, and he felt so happily normal, simply sitting here at the table having a conversation with the Viscount. The man looked up, over Kimi's shoulder, obviously seeing someone enter the room. Kimi glanced back, seeing Sebastian, who gave him a quizzical, curious look, which Kimi studiously ignored.

"Ah, Sebastian," Viscount Coulthard said. "Come here, sit down with us, I'd like to ask you both something."

Sebastian sat himself in the chair next to Kimi, who could tell he was somewhat unnerved to be dealing directly with the Viscount. Kimi reached over and took Sebastian's hand, holding it reassuringly.

Viscount Coulthard regarded them for a moment, then began. "I would like to formally offer the two of you a place here at the estate. Kimi, I'm familiar enough with your work for Lord Rosberg to know you're an excellent manager, and Sebastian, Mark's told me of your bookkeeping skills. You'd both be an asset to our household and I know all the staff and indeed myself would very much like for you to remain here with us."

Kimi looked at Sebastian. They hadn't yet discussed the future in any way, and Kimi knew this wasn't a decision to take lightly. Yes, in the past they'd made vague plans for a life on the land Kimi's parents had left him, but so much had changed since then. 

"I…" he started, about to tell Viscount Coulthard that they'd need time to think about his offer, generous as it was, but Sebastian interrupted, speaking firmly over the top of Kimi.

"Thank you, my lord," he said. "We couldn't be more grateful for everything you've done for us, but…" he paused, his voice faltering almost undetectably, but then he gripped Kimi's hand harder and went on. "If you'll grant me permission to leave then we have a place of our own waiting for us, and once Kimi's well enough we'd like to move on."

Kimi stared at Sebastian, pleasantly surprised by his decisiveness. He narrowed his eyes questioningly, but Sebastian nodded back at him, seeming absolutely certain.

"Well," said the Viscount, "I can't say I'm not disappointed but I can understand.You can leave whenever you're ready, Sebastian, but I do hope you'll both come back and visit us all as often as you can, yes?"

"Of course," Kimi replied. "It's not too far from here, so we'll be back." He smiled. "Dan will make certain of that, I'm sure."

Viscount Coulthard laughed. "He is really rather charmingly persistent, isn't he?"

"He's hard to resist," Sebastian agreed.

Kimi looked down at the table for a moment, serious now as he composed himself. "But I couldn't begin to say how much we appreciate the help you gave us, my lord. I won't ever forget it, and I doubt I could ever repay you..." 

Kimi didn't know what else to say, but the Viscount obviously understood. "I'm just glad that it all worked out so well," he said. "And if you remember," he went on, his tone lighter, "I did say once that I owed you a favor, so consider the debt paid." 

"Thank you," said Kimi.

"You are more than welcome." Viscount Coulthard stood up. "And with that I'll take my leave of you. And know that if you should change your mind at any time, my offer still stands." He took Kimi's hand, shaking it firmly, then did the same with Sebastian. "You will always have a place here, both of you."

He swept out of the room, leaving behind the vague scent of perfumed oil.

Kimi turned to look at Sebastian. "Are you sure that's what you want?" he asked. "If you'd rather stay here, I wouldn't mind."

"No." Sebastian shook his head. "I'll miss everyone here, of course I will, but I just want to be with you, just the two of us."

"Just the two of us," Kimi echoed. He leaned over and kissed Sebastian, mouth lingering lovingly over his full, soft lips. He pulled back and looked into Sebastian's eyes, letting everything he felt radiate out through his gaze, open and unashamed, secure in the knowledge that he was finally no longer alone and would never be so again. "Sounds perfect," he said.

===

"You need any help with that?" Sebastian called out.

"No, I'm fine," Kimi answered.

Several months had passed since the fateful events that had almost destroyed them both, and life was finally beginning to settle into some kind of routine. 

When they'd finally been able to make the journey to Kimi's family farm, they'd found the fields overgrown with weeds and the fences collapsed, but the stone-built cabin was still standing. It had looked to be in a state of almost total disrepair, but closer inspection had shown the foundations and walls were solid. A whole group from Viscount Coulthard's household, Dan, Jev, Mark and Fernando among them, had come out for a few days and helped construct a new roof for the place. It had been hard work, but with so many hands the job had gone quickly. 

There was still a multitude of smaller tasks that needed to be completed and Kimi was tackling them one at a time. He still wasn't as strong as he'd once been and needed to rest more often than he'd like, but the work was getting done. Today he was fixing the badly warped door frame that was letting cold drafts into the house at night.

His back was completely healed, but the scars the injuries had left were thick and misshapen. Kimi found it difficult to raise his arms above shoulder height, and the skin often itched and pulled, making him feel like he was trapped inside an unyielding carapace. But it seemed to be gradually improving. Sebastian would regularly rub oil into his back to soften it, which made a huge difference.

"Are you sure you don't need any help?" Sebastian said, coming up behind Kimi, slinging his arms loosely around his waist and gently kissing the nape of his neck.

"It's nearly done," replied Kimi. He knew the offer was mostly for form's sake, as Sebastian had turned out to be endearingly useless at construction and practical repairs. But he was skilled in other ways: their thriving vegetable patch was testament to that, Sebastian surprising even himself with his previously undiscovered green thumb. Between the garden and the dairy cow and flock of chickens Viscount Coulthard had gifted them with, they were currently living a life of abundance.

Sebastian pressed up closer, and Kimi ceased his work, leaning back into him contentedly. He could feel Sebastian's cock hard against his ass, but neither of them made any motion to satisfaction. For quite some time they'd done nothing but kiss and touch each other, in no hurry to resume the sexual part of their relationship, but in the past several weeks they'd ventured as far a few tentatively exciting hand jobs, and Kimi knew things were building between them, the tension of want starting to return.

He hissed slightly as a drop of sweat ran down his spine, stinging at the inflamed, scarred skin.

"Is your back bothering you?" asked Sebastian, concerned. "Do you want me to put some oil on it?"

"No, it's okay," said Kimi. "It'll pass."

"No," Sebastian replied, "come on, you've been working too long anyway, you know you have to be careful with getting enough rest."

"Fine." Kimi rolled his eyes, making Sebastian laugh. He put down his tools and allowed Sebastian to lead him inside. "Fuss, fuss, fuss," he grumbled happily.

"Poor, put-upon, Kimi," Sebastian teased, fetching the oil as Kimi pulled off his shirt and flopped face down on their bed.

Sebastian climbed across him, straddling Kimi's thighs, sitting down on to him. Kimi felt the oil drizzle down over him, slightly colder than his skin but soon warming as Sebastian's nimble fingers began to massage it in, working at the thick knots of scars that marred Kimi's back.

Kimi lay there, enjoying the feeling and letting his mind wander, remembering when Sebastian had washed his back those mornings in the bathhouse, how strange and unsettling it had been at the time. It had been so long then, since anyone had touched him, and now here he was, spoiled for it.

He recalled how hard he'd had to concentrate to not get too much of an erection, Sebastian's skilled hands making it almost impossible to avoid becoming aroused. Today, though, there were no such constraints and Kimi sighed, relaxing into it as his cock began to stir beneath him.

For a time, he simply enjoyed the feeling, but soon he began to feel the slightest edge to it, that sweetly familiar _need_. He considered, wondering if it was the right time to take things further, whether either of them were ready, but they could always take a step back if things got too much. He trusted that Sebastian would tell him if this was too far, too fast. 

Kimi raised his hips off the bed just enough, unlacing his breeches and shoving them down past his ass. He could hear Sebastian behind him, beginning to breathe harder.

"You can go a bit lower with it," Kimi said quietly. For a split second, Sebastian hesitated, but then his hands moved downwards, slick with oil as they stroked over Kimi's ass, gently at first, but then more assured, the touch firm, almost demanding.

Kimi shifted himself, rubbing slowly up against the bed. Sebastian's fingers dipped lightly into the crevice of Kimi's ass, and he found himself letting out a loud, unrestrained moan, as if something inside of him had been finally released, broken wide open. Desire swept over him, and he was suddenly overwhelmed, desperate for it, grinding himself against the mattress wantonly.

"Fuck," he said, "fuck, _please_ , Seb, I need you."

"It's okay," Sebastian soothed. "I've got you." An oiled finger slid inside him and Kimi pushed back up into it, hungry for more. There were two fingers, three, and then the blunt tip of Sebastian's cock pressed up against him, entering so slowly than Kimi heard himself whine with want. 

Sebastian stopped when he was fully seated within him, waiting, and Kimi felt a surprising relief flood through him. He realized that somewhere deep in his mind, he'd been terrified that once Sebastian was inside him, other memories would return, intruding on what they shared, poisoning it, but those events couldn't feel further away right now. Not when Sebastian was now thrusting into him, grabbing Kimi's hips and lifting him up off the bed, dragging him back onto his hands and knees so he could take hold of Kimi's cock, pulling on it with rough, efficient strokes.

They both came quickly, the pent up energy of it like an explosion as the two of them cried out in unison. Kimi could feel himself trembling as Sebastian pulled out of him, and he collapsed down on to the bed, weak and spent.

Something welled up in his chest like a wave cresting, a feeling he didn't understand, and he was unable to restrain himself as a wailing sob escaped from him, his body wracked with it as he started to cry in earnest. "Sorry," he kept saying, trying to stop but only losing control further. "I'm so sorry."

Sebastian didn't say anything, simply gathering Kimi into his arms, holding him until the worst of it passed. He kissed the top of Kimi's head, stroked his hair tenderly, and waited, patient, until Kimi finally started to calm. He inhaled, deep and gasping, burying his face in Sebastian's neck, trying to steady himself.

At last, he was able to relax somewhat, resting his head on Sebastian's chest and listening to him breathe, lying there quietly. He felt oddly cleansed, almost _lighter_ , as if he'd set down a heavy burden he hadn't even known he was carrying. The evening began to close in around them, light dimming, but neither of them made any move to get up, remaining in silence. There was nothing more that needed to be said, the connection between them existing as something far beyond mere words.

"You know," said Kimi at last, what felt like hours later, "I have something I need to tell you." He raised his head, looking into Sebastian's eyes.

"What?" Sebastian asked.

Kimi frowned, trying to gather his thoughts. "You remember that Viscount Coulthard still technically owns you, yeah?"

"Yes," replied Sebastian. He didn't sound happy about it, but there was a resigned acceptance in his tone.

"Well, I made some arrangements with him before we left."

"So I'm going to belong to you?" Sebastian asked hopefully.

"No." Kimi smiled at him. "Next week, we can collect the papers, and you'll be freed."

"Freed?" Sebastian asked, as if he didn't quite understand. "I won't be a slave anymore?"

"No," Kimi confirmed. "You won't ever belong to anyone again, your life is your own."

The biggest grin Kimi had ever seen spread slowly over Sebastian's face, and he practically lunged at Kimi, grabbing him and hugging him so hard Kimi struggled to breathe for a minute. When Sebastian finally let go, he leaned back, still smiling as he wiped a few tears away.

"Thank you," he said, the words full of emotion. "Thank you." He nudged Kimi playfully. "But you do know I'm not going anywhere, right? Even if you don't own me?"

Kimi shrugged. "I think we're pretty much stuck with each other."

"You're like a poet, the way you talk." Sebastian grinned at him.

"Whatever," replied Kimi, beginning to feel as if he was on steadier ground now. "But there's something else," he said. "I know your family's estate is long gone, but when you're free, you can reclaim your title."

"No, Sebastian said, without the slightest hesitation. "I wouldn't want that."

"You'd have status," Kimi pointed out. "Position."

"I don't need either of those," Sebastian replied. "Status and position never brought me or my family anything but grief."

Kimi nodded, understanding. "Well," he said, "it's probably better anyway."

"Why?"

"I don't think I could get used to calling you 'my lord'."

"I don't know," Sebastian laughed, "I think I might kind of enjoy you calling me 'my lord'."

"Yeah, that's not ever going to happen," Kimi stated defiantly.

"You never know," said Sebastian, smiling as he leaned in for a deep, open kiss, tongue curling lazily into Kimi's mouth. 

Kimi hummed happily in response, snuggling back into Sebastian's embrace. "I love you," he murmured against Sebastian's lips.

"I love you too," Sebastian replied, the words whispered into Kimi's skin.

Darkness closed around them, but they barely noticed, warm together, their hearts beating steadily as one, safe and forever unbroken.


End file.
